


Chocolates

by Aaronmizuno



Category: Love Live! School Idol Festival (Video Game), Love Live! School Idol Project
Genre: Angst, Believe in Happy Endings, Biting, F/F, Female Protagonist, Female Relationships, Gay Nishikino Maki, Illustrated, Implied Sexual Content, Nishikino Maki-centric, Resolved Sexual Tension, Sad, Suggestive Themes, Teenage Drama, Texting, Valentine's Day, Valentine's Day Fluff, after canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-03-14
Packaged: 2019-03-18 06:00:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 45,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13675713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aaronmizuno/pseuds/Aaronmizuno
Summary: A surprise Valentine's Day visit from the professional idol world's newest darling Yazawa Nico, kick-starting the beginning of the end of the long stalemate in her and Maki's relationship.For better or worse, baby.The fluff tag only applies to the first chapter. Additional tags may appear as the story continues.





	1. Valentines Day Chocolate

**Valentines Day Chocolate**

 

Notes: This story is an alternate timeline from the one occurring in my main story, Nishikino, taking place in Maki’s second year.

  


\----------

  
Maki was running late. A rare enough happenstance that when Kayo-chin’s Line message popped up asking where she was and if she was okay, it made sense. It didn’t annoy her. It just made her smile and tap out the truth. She relayed that she’d stayed up too late reviewing Otonokizaka’s new idol group’s latest composition (again) and was just heading out. It might have been more information than was strictly necessary, but this was Kayo-chin. She’s one of the only people on the planet that Maki would bend over backwards to make happy.   
  
It was the follow-up message that threw her.   
  
**_Fuwafuwa.Rhapsody:_ ** Oh good! Nico-chan is here! She was asking about you.  <3   
  
It didn’t just throw her, it physically stopped her in her tracks. Why would Nico be at Otonoki? Shouldn’t she be in Osaka!? She had a super exclusive sold-out event at the Billboard Live tomorrow that she should be preparing for! What the hell was she doing screwing around here in Tokyo!?   
  
**_Fuwafuwa.Rhapsody:_ ** You know what today is, after all~!   
  
On the move again at a significantly increased pace, Maki checked the top of her phone and cursed inwardly. February 14th. Valentine’s Day. Obligatory chocolate exchange day. Stores with high enough quality sweets to warrant gifting didn’t open until ten and none were on the way to class anyway. Maki twirled around and kicked in a Start Dash home. She had a personal reserve she could tap for the eleven girls that she had meant to make the effort for, only five of which were µ's alumni. The other six were a few members of the A/V club, members of the new idol group, and a classmate who had been exceedingly helpful in this past µ's-less year that would likely be the VP to her impending student council president position.   
  
It was the sudden appearance of this sixth former µ's member that was the problem. Regifted and no-effort chocolate wouldn’t do for _her._ It’s not that Nico was picky… just being remembered would have been appreciated and she knew it. it’s that Maki had already ordered a fairly significant spread to be delivered to her room as a fire-and-forget measure. In Osaka. _Where Nico no longer was._ _  
_ _  
_ Regifted chocolate would feel awful to hand over after all the effort she’d spent arranging _that_ delivery.   
  
“God dammit, Nico…” Maki muttered for what was probably the hundred and eleventh time this month, “Everything always has to be so _difficult_ with you _._ ”   
  
Maki had been proud of that spread! This kind of thing was… difficult… and not just counting the logistics of finding a trustworthy member of the team that could keep her secretly appraised of Nico’s whereabouts and lodgings. It was tough emotionally as well… especially given the lack of any kind of confirmation on either end. No confessions. No kissing (that wasn’t on the cheek or forehead anyway…), and certainly no illicit rendezvous that could potentially send Nico’s rocketing idol career into a tailspin. Just… countless little heartfelt efforts that hopefully conveyed what they felt.   
  
Maki was… pretty sure it was mutual anyway. The spread in Osaka would have been MORE than enough to deliver that message! Even better, she wouldn’t be there just in case it was received poorly or to muck up anything that could come after… as she inevitably would.

She _always_ screwed things up when it came to Nico.   
  
Kayo-chin sent four more messages by the time Maki sprang from her home, chocolate in hand, a fifth dinging as she jogged down the road. It wasn’t until she was stuck at a crosswalk five blocks later that she was able to fully secure the sweets in her bag and fish out her phone.   
  
**_Fuwafuwa.Rhapsody:_ ** She seemed _really_ disappointed that she didn’t get to catch you at the gate.   
  
**_Fuwafuwa.Rhapsody:_ ** Oop! She wanted it to be a surprise! I’d say pretend you didn’t know, but she caught me texting you. Sorry!   
  
**_Fuwafuwa.Rhapsody:_ ** She says she’s going to hang out in the club room most of the day. Isn’t she supposed to be in Osaka?   
  
**_Fuwafuwa.Rhapsody:_ ** Rin-chan says you should “go for it” this time.   
  
**_Fuwafuwa.Rhapsody:_ ** Natsume-chan keeps apologizing for relying on you so much. Any luck with her composition?   
  
Oh thank god. Something about today could be business as usual. To this, Maki tapped out a quick reply of, “Chop Rin extra hard for me, tell her to mind her own business, and assure Oda that it’s not a problem. It’s serviceable. I’ll deal with Nico later.”   
  
She said that now, but she knew that was total bullshit. She would sooner ditch her duties as class rep in the morning than miss out on a chance like this. Now… if only she’d kept up on her exercise. This whole running thing was way more difficult than it was a few months ago…   
  
\--------------------  
  
  
The club room was empty. This was… fortunate? She had like, two minutes to get to her seat. It didn’t feel fortunate at all. It actually felt like she imagined waking up to a stocking full of coal on Christmas morning would be like. She… god help her… she even took the time to walk around the table to make sure Nico hadn’t taken a nap just out of view. How pathetic was that? Thank god she _wasn’t_ there because the aftermath of being caught being so needy would have been _terrible._   
  
Especially given the lost puppy look on her face… or the unintended whine that came along with her pout. Now she was mad at Kayo-chin too, wishing she hadn’t known she’d come so close to seeing Japan’s newest “ _darling.”_ It’s not like she had any real claim to her time anyway… just...   
  
With a sigh, she turned and left. Sniffing back her disappointment and scrounging to find the dignity she’d temporarily forgotten.

 

\-------------------

 

“Maaaaaaaaaaaki-chaaaa~n!” Rin cheered from behind, having latched on with her usual affectionate cheer, “Maki-chan~ Maki-chan!! Look! Look!”  
  
“Look at what?” Maki groaned wearily, entirely for show, “I can’t see what you have if you’re hiding behind me.”   
  
Suddenly, Maki’s vision was filled with blurred browns and oranges, causing her to flinch back with an alarmed, “Bueh!?”   
  
“See! Look what Nico-chan made for me, nya!!!” Rin cheered, now cheek-to-cheek and displaying the… apparently chocolate… as proudly as if she’d made it herself. It was definitely a Nico-created confection. A two dimensional, cat-head shaped chocolate with some… admittedly adorable detailing done with tubed on white and dark chocolate. Most of the piece was orange, probably from some kind of food coloring.   
  
The more Maki looked at it, difficult as it was with Rin waving it back and forth, the more impressive it became. It looked better than most professionally decorated sweets, and Maki had seen quite a few. If Nico had put this much time into Rin’s… what would be waiting for her?   
  
She needed something. She needed it to be here and she needed it fast.   
  
“It’s nice,” Maki commented flatly, “Now get off so I can give you chocolate from me, unless you didn’t want it.”   
  
Rin’s over exaggerated gasp, cheek self-slap, and backpedalling was… expected. Expected, but satisfying. Maki let the annoyance in her expression slip for just a moment to flash a smile Hanayo’s way as she pulled out the imported fudge truffles in her bag. They might not be hand-made, but she _was_ sharing her absolute favorites.   
  
Her favorite chocolates for her favorite people.

 

\------------------

 

By the time lunch came around, every µ's alumni still remaining in attendance at Otonokizaka had made a point to not only tell Maki via Line that Nico was here, somewhere, but to also send a selfie with the incredibly well-made and thoughtful valentines chocolate she’d given to them. Two of them actually had a little of the famous Yazawa in the shot, so that confirmed that this wasn’t all just some incredibly cruel joke.  
  
Whether that was better or worse, Maki intentionally forced herself not to think about it. She _was_ at school after all. There were classes to focus on, homework to scramble to completion, cram school homework to wrap up, notes to finalize, modifications to suggest and explain to the new group’s composer Oda Natsume, and last ditch texted preparations with Waki-san to deal with the… issue at hand.   
  
Swallowing down her disappointment at having gone through half the day without a glimpse or so much as text from the sneaky Valentine’s gift-giver, Maki was ready to commit to scheduling the appointment that, from the phone vibrating, Waki likely just sent her the time for via Line.   
  
Only it wasn’t Waki. It was a selfie of Nico. On the roof. Wearing shades, sticking her tongue out, and throwing out a one-handed Nico-nii.   
  
**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Meet me on the roof if you’re lookin’ for an ass-kicking.  
  
The amount of relief and excitement at the invitation was… well… honestly? It was humiliating. Fortunately, no one was looking at her grin like a complete moron before biting her lip and texting back.   
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You better get running, because you’ve done it now, _little girl._   
  
There. That should get a rise out of her. Maki’s smile couldn’t be wider, or more mischievous, as she entered the stairwell leading to the roof. She wasn’t getting away this time.   
  
With haste she’d never admit, Maki bolted up the stairs until the last flight, taking a moment to calm her breathing, straighten her hair, smooth her blazer… that kind of thing. A quick peek out the roof-access door’s window just showed an empty roof, so Maki plowed on ahead trying to look as nonchalant as possible.   
  
That casual face was completely spoiled when, as she crossed the threshold, Nico called out in her deepest voice, “Nishikino Maki! You’ve got a lot of nerve standing up the likes of Yazawa Nico, Rising Star of the Idol World!”   
  
The outburst made Maki not only jump in surprise, but squeak. Maki hated squeaking… almost as much as that dumb ‘bueh’ thing that kept slipping out.

Standing tall with the help of some rather impressive heels, Nico stood imperiously to the side of the door, pointing dramatically as she continued, “I waited at the front gate for you for almost an hour! Don’t you know valuable my time is!?”  
  
Schooling surprise with as much boredom as she could muster, Maki shot back, “Nico-chan… what the hell are you even doing here. You should be in Osaka.”   
  
Nico dropped the Lady Yazawa act to look absurdly pleased. As she approached, she grinned and replied, “You knew?”

“Of course I knew, idiot. You better not be getting cold feet after finally making it big,” Maki said with a wink.  
  
All grins, Nico took advantage of the added height to switch the usual hug dynamics around on her… and it was honestly kind of glorious. Resting her cheek against Nico’s collar was a guilty pleasure that had become incredibly rare as contact with her became more and more scarce.   
  
“Is everything alright?” Maki asked, “The show is still on for tomorrow, isn’t it? You didn’t get canceled, did you?”   
  
“Pfft. Hardly. I wasn’t about to let Valentine’s Day pass without seeing my best girl. The stage isn’t the same without you guys and I had to make sure you all knew that _someone_ still thought the world of you.”   
  
Maki was glad that Nico’s chin was in her hair. This expression was a bit too honest to share. With a sigh, Maki replied, “You idiot, we still have to go out with face masks for any after-school gatherings. I’m surprised you haven’t been swarmed all day. Maybe you’re not as popular as you think.”   
  
Nico scoffed, but didn’t otherwise react.

Maki pulled away, wanting to get a better look at the elusive Yazawa, “That aside, everyone seemed really happy with their chocolate. They’ve been blasting my Line with it all day. Have you just been hiding up here all morning?”  
  
“Yup,” Nico chirped, “Waiting until I wouldn’t get my number one fan in trouble~ Did you worry I’d forgotten you?”   
  
“Ugh. Hardly,” Maki groaned, but let the smile stay, “Did you really come all the way out here just for us?”   
  
“Well, you guys and Cocoro really needed a pick-me-up. She got turned down a few days ago and I couldn’t let her just sit and sulk on Valentine’s day!”   
  
Maki grabbed onto Nico’s arms and cried out, “Cocoro _liked_ someone enough to _confess_ … and they _turned her down!?_ What the hell? Is she okay? _”_   
  
Eyes sparkling, Nico gave a sheepish smile and replied, “Yeah, she’s a tough girl. It helped to see her famous big sister though.”   
  
“Do you have any plans for her for later?”   
  
With a questioning look, Nico asked, “I… well… not really. I thought we’d just hang out a little before I had to jump back on a plane for Osaka.”   
  
Maki bit her lip and thought about her impromptu planning. This was _really_ not the time to be selfish, despite how badly she wanted to be. With a pained look that she couldn’t restrain, Maki asked, “When I heard you were back… I… may have jumped the gun a little.”   
  
“Aww, did Maki-chan think I’d come all the way out here to spend Valentine’s Day with _her_ ? It’d make sense since I love my Maki-chan sooooo much, and you were _definitely_ the top of the list. It’s just… that list was for Nico being selfish and not being a good big sister.”   
  
Confessions without confessing. The name of their game. Maki shrugged, sighed, and held up her phone to show a storefront, “I… may have got us reservations at La Maison Du Chocolat over in Minato. I… when everyone said you had all this cute chocolate for them I… ugh… I didn’t want to not have something in return.”   
  
Nico matched Maki’s sigh, though her face was all bright smiles, as it always was these days, “Maki-chan really doesn’t do things half-way, does she? Isn’t that what White Day’s for? Kind of presumptuous though, thinking that just because everyone else got Nico’s handmade choco that she’d have some for _you_ .”   
  
“Y-you don’t?” Maki replied, taking a step back wide-eyed and surprised. God, all this distance had completely destroyed her ability to remain composed around her… and that absence had made it more difficult to be angry about the fact.   
  
“Of course I do!” Nico laughed, clearly reveling in Maki’s reaction, “Maki-chan’s my favorite, after all~”   
  
Trying her best not to sulk at how easily Nico was pummeling her heart today, Maki thrust the phone back into her face, “Right. Anyway. Cocoro needs this more than I do. Do you think she’d be interested?”   
  
“You sure? It’s got to be brutal to get in there today of all days. I didn’t even know that place _took_ reservations…” Nico replied, her voice soft, “... and what about you?”   
  
“Cocoro is important to me. Valentine’s day is supposed to make you feel better about your relationships, not dwelling on being turned down. Especially not someone as sweet as her.”   
  
“Maybe _you_ should take her,” Nico suggested, taking Maki’s hand in hers, “You know… it wasn’t a boy that turned her down.”   
  
“Bueh? But you… wait… what?”   
  
Nico giggled even harder, pulling the continually off-balance Nishikino into another hug, “Oh, I’ve missed messin’ with you. Yeah, turns out that girl likes the ladies as much as her big sister. I really should have seen it coming with how taken she was with you… even though _everyone_ loves Maki-chan.”   
  
“But… you should be there… and I…”   
  
“Yeah, probably shouldn’t give her the wrong impression. If you broke her heart after all she’s already been through I think I’d be pretty mad at you. Still, I kind of like the idea of the three of us hanging out again.”   
  
Grateful again for the hug-obfuscation, Maki’s face was scrunched up with frustration. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go _at all_ . Why did it feel like Nico was… was trying to pawn her off on Cocoro. _Of course_ that’s not what was happening here, but still. For that matter, why would anyone turn down Cocoro? She was such a sweet kid! Sweet, but... alone time with Nico… Ugh. Too many strong feelings battling it out for supremacy.   
  
“It has to be you. You know you mean the world to her,” Maki managed as Waki’s message arrived asking for confirmation to continue. Maki tapped out a quick request to see if the expansion to a 3-seater would be possible and multiple apologies for being a pain. Nico just stroked her hair as she received an immediate reply and then confirmed with thanks.   
  
Maki pulled away and made a show of putting her phone back in her bag, “It looks like they can accommodate us. Are you sure you’re alright with me coming?”   
  
Nico’s smile looked less bright, but somehow more genuine, “You’re too much sometimes, you know that? _Of course_ I want you to come along. Cocoro will too. If there’s anyone on the planet who shouldn’t be alone on Valentine’s Day, it’s Nishikino Maki...”   
  
The temporarily taller woman leaned in and pressed her lips to Maki’s forehead, whispering, “Thank you. You really are the best,” before pulling back and re-brightening to idol levels, “Next to yours truly, that is! Enough of getting sidetracked with you stealing the show by being amazing. It’s time for Maki-chan to _truly_ accept Nico’s feelings in the form of _lovingly_ crafted Valentine’s day choco!~”   
  
Flatly, Maki deadpanned, “... You’re saying _I’m_ too much?,” before sighing and turning away while leaving a hand outstretched, “Alright. I _suppose_ I’ll accept Nico-chan’s chocolate.”

Yeah. That’s right. Swallow all those warm and fuzzy feelings bubbling in your heart and put on that ‘I couldn’t care less’ show. There was legitimate pride in being able to shrug off that level of praise and affection without combusting/imploding on the spot. Particularly with how _intensely_ effective it was.

Oh yeah.

Still got it.  
  
“That’s my girl,” Nico preened, “Get ready to have that Nishikino pride _wrecked_ . Feast your eyes on _these_ beauties!”   
  
Maki didn’t turn until she felt the bag (a bag!?) in her hand. Nico hadn’t let go just yet, because the bag was too big to fit in one hand alone. A quick look to double-check was in order. This was… kind of crazy.   
  
“That’s right, sweetness. That’s all yours… but don’t keep me waiting. You’ve got to have one right now.”   
  
The clear cellophane wrapping held what looked like dozens of individually sculpted, three-dimensional, dark chocolate rabbits. Alright, they looked like they had used a mold, but a quick glance showed that each of them had received some level of customization. Were each of these unique?   
  
“This is…,” Maki began, but faltered. It was certainly excessive… but incredibly thoughtful. She couldn’t make light of this level of effort… but if she was honest about it she’d end up saying too much.   
  
“Say, thank you, Maki-chan.”   
  
“Thank you,” Maki replied, almost throwing in her own name at the end as a full-mimic since no other snark was coming to mind naturally, “They’re beautiful.”   
  
“And not for just looking at! Come on, try one!”   
  
“Right,” Maki fumbled, suddenly forgetting how to work a goddamn twist-tie. So much for ‘still having it’. Maybe the reason they hadn’t hooked up yet had nothing to do with idol protocol and everything to do with moments of complete ineptitude like _THIS._ A quick glance at Nico’s wildly amused face, barely hidden behind a gloved hand, definitely suggested she just kept her around for comedic value.   
  
“There. Jeez,” Maki griped, finally getting the package open and pulling out the one on top. It… oh my god, it had fwoopy chocolate curls molded to mimic Maki’s own hairstyle. There were dabs of purple colored chocolate over the eyes and angry red eyebrows. It was absolutely _adorable_ .   
  
Somehow, Maki managed to speak through an incredibly crooked smile, “I’m not sure how I’m supposed to feel about eating myself.”   
  
“What, you’d rather eat me instead?” Nico teased, laying a hand over her heart and fanning herself with the other, “You’ll have to get further down before you find those.”   
  
“There is no way you didn’t come up with that line ahead of time,” Maki replied coolly, though her face was practically steaming.   
  
“Damn straight I did. Now, hurry up and let me watch you eat yourself.”   
  
Both caught a passing case of the giggles before Maki composed herself enough to pop the one-and-a-half-lego-brick-tall piece in her mouth. She bit down and her mouth was overwhelmed with the indulgent warmth of rich dark chocolate ganache filling. Nico’s smile stretched wide as Maki couldn’t help but groan in delight. All pretense was gone. It wouldn’t matter where Maki took Nico after school. Nico had won this battle. Nico had taken a year of listening to Maki’s preferences and transformed it into the perfect weapon, matching class with quantity in a bite that was just one step from being too much.   
  
“Hee hee, that was a good sound,” Nico preened.   
  
“My god. Nico-chan. This is amazing... I’m delicious,” Maki praised, legitimately feeling like she needed to sit down because this mouthful was taking up all of her brains processing power.   
  
“I’ll be the judge of that later~” Nico teased, riding the emotional payoff of what must have been an enormous amount of work. That filling wasn’t too thick or dry… it was like… like a molten lava cake’s filling without the heat. How did she do that? It was so good that the innuendo _almost_ passed by unnoticed.   
  
Nico slid in, wrapped an arm around her shoulders, and asked, “So when’s our reservation, Hot Stuff? I’m going to have to go get Cocoro’s outfit prepared for our big date, which I’m getting really excited about by the way.”   
  
Maki’s mind was clearly still rebooting from the Shokugeki no Soma levels of sweets bliss, so she merely brought up the text conversation with Waki and showed her. Unfortunately, Nico touched the screen and swiped to earlier in the conversation. She immediately started cracking up, “Aww, Maki-chan, I count as a huge emergency? She guessed it was me before you told her? Just how much do you talk to that poor woman about me?”   
  
_That_ got her mind moving moving. With a wide-eyed close-mouthed scream, Maki scurried a few steps away while locking her phone. “I take it back. You two go on without me. Pass along my best, would you?”   
  
Nico stopped guffawing long enough to reply, “Yeah, yeah, text me the deets when your face cools down. I’ll see you there though, right?”   
  
“I’ll... stop at home first to get changed. There’ll be time,” Maki relented.   
  
“Ohh! So this really _is_ a date, then? I **_knew_ ** this was a good idea. Let’s embarrass the hell out of that poor girl. Sound good?”   
  
“You’re evil, you know that?” Maki replied, lightening up now that her face was no longer melting.   
  
“Ehhh!? Nico doesn’t know what you’re talking about! Nico’s all about bringing smiles to everyone’s hearts! Nico Nico Niiiiii~” Nico beamed before continuing, “Oh, and Maki-chan better dress flirty date-nice. Nico guarantees that there’ll be paparazzi since she’s supposed to be in Osaka. Cocoro’s debut should _definitely_ be with beautiful famous ladies at each arm, ne?”   
  
Nico’s smile was as infectious as ever. Maki agreed, “As long as she’s comfortable with it. I don’t want to upset her any more than she’s already been.”   
  
The idol smile seamlessly shifted to Nico’s most genuine as she crossed the distance once more, “... and that’s why Maki-chan is my favorite. If I had you on tour with me, I really would have it all.”   
  
“I’ve missed you too,” Maki allowed, giving in fully to the embrace and breathing deep that lively Yazawa Nico cocktail of strawberries and melon.

 

\-------------------

 

  
As expected, the others leapt at the chance to point out Nico’s continued wildly flirtatious behavior as undeniable proof of her interest. That had become a thing this year; trying to encourage Maki to complicate Nico’s already tumultuous life by burdening her with her stupid, and ultimately pointless, feelings.   
  
Didn’t they get that things were better as they were? Right now things were so… safe. Nico laid it on thick, particularly when they were alone. _Way_ thicker than when other people were around… which told Maki that she wanted to keep things secretive. Private. Just between them. If Maki started reciprocating with as much fervor… it would probably just scare her off.   
  
It’s like they didn’t understand that Nico was able to be so blatant _because_ she wouldn’t act on it. Even if she really… _really_ wanted to. Maki always wrote it off (and may have even fantasized a little) to the woman likely having an enormous sex drive that she had to safely vent off somehow. Previously, any sign of returning that level of affection always ended… well… awkward. The speed at which Nico backed off… well… better to have those private moments than to lose her completely. There were worse fates than being on the receiving end of that kind of attention, even if you wanted to reciprocate with all of your being but just wasn’t allowed.   
  
So, by the time she was on her way home, the constant retaliatory head-chops on Rin, the patient denials to Kayo-chin, enduring unrequested advice from Umi and Kotori (who had flown back from Paris for the week), and restraining herself from visiting violence upon an over-excited and over-affectionate Honoka… Maki was feelin’ a little surly.   
  
She almost canceled.

  
Almost.

 

… but the allure of getting to spend Valentine’s day with Nico, publicly, in a date setting, with the safety net of her intelligent and adorable little sister was too amazing an opportunity to even _consider_ passing on.   
  
After surviving the µ's gauntlet, sans Nozomi and Eli, the only challenge remaining was wardrobe. How date-like should she go? Her parents loved keeping her classy with the kimonos, but… no. Her personal take if she were to hypothetically be spending the evening alone with Nico would be along the lines of her Bibi attire… which… also no.   
  
Ultimately, she settled for a more western classy.

  *  Black mid-length dress with sheer rose-and-thorny-vine designs running down the length of her arms and across a sheer “open” back.  
(Because Nico always made strangely flattering and inappropriate comments when it looked like she was going bra-less)  
•  Strappy heels.



(Because just say no to Nico having the height advantage)  
•  Gold bracelets and layered gold chain necklaces.

(Because any Bibi throwback just made her feel attractive as hell)

  *   The Louis Vuitton handbag from the µ's collab they did just after their brief stint in the U.S.  
  
Maki fucking loved that stupid bag with it’s gaudy µ's logo. It was the perfect example of bad design being excused because of the name attached. Black faux crocodile scale that gleamed like latex dom gear? Gold filigree and chain connecting the handle and strap? Diamond bedazzled µ's logo? It was just… _indulgently_ terrible.  




Throw in some extra care on eyeshadow, contouring, lipstick, and eyeliner. Pick an appropriate fragrance. Swap out the sheer for darker stockings because the bruising around her knee from Monday still hadn’t totally faded. Tossle the hair and boom, she was ready to stoke some fires and catch some Yazawa eyes. Sure, she could play it off like she was teasing Cocoro, but there’s no way she wasn’t going to play up to _her_ “best girl.”

 

\-------------------

 

“H-hello,” Cocoro began, wide eyed and already blushing, “I… ah… It’s good to see you?”  
  
“It’s been too long,” Maki replied warmly. It didn’t take any special effort either. Maki loved that kid. Still, there was decorum to observe and if this was going to be an evening of indulging the poor girl then no time like the present, “I think I may have underdressed for the occasion. Nico-chan didn’t warn me how cute you’d gotten.”   
  
It was odd to feel satisfaction from making a fourteen year old blush. Maybe it was Nico’s enjoyment of seeing the girl squirm being infectious? Either way, Maki was grateful for taking the time to go to the nines. Nico had done the same, clearly having taken advantage of her new massive budget to expand her wardrobe.   
  
Nico was also right about the cameras. Apparently, when a high class, open door establishment knows that a nationally beloved icon was coming in on the busiest day of their year, they called in _everybody._   
  
Times like this really reminded you just how long Nico had been waiting for this kind life. She didn’t just play up to the cameras, she commanded them. There were even a few people looking for interviews with the “Idol on the lamb,” who had gone missing from her post in Osaka overnight. Maki would always prefer a more personal Nico, but she couldn’t deny that the woman’s public game was strong.   
  
Cocoro was also a natural. She handled it with grace that Maki could only marvel at, especially for someone who hadn’t already been caught in this kind of thing before. It took quite a bit of willpower to draw back up that idol persona that she and Nico had built together. Remembering the tone of voice, the expressions and body language, the turns of phrase that complimented their dynamics… all of it came back, but not easily. Why she hadn’t expected this was beyond her.   
  
Still, watching Cocoro swallow down the intense fluster and pressure of knowing that footage of her was absolutely going to be appearing in the news tonight along with at least a week’s worth of variety shows, was inspiring. Watching her endure it while on the receiving end of the combined attentions of the most playfully volatile µ's ship NicoMaki? That was a masterpiece.

  
Oh... the chocolate was good too.

 

\-------------------

  
“Alright kids, just settle in and give me a few to lose these guys. It’s good to see you two again, by the way.”   
  
“Likewise, Waki-san. Thanks again!” Nico chirped as she helped Cocoro get buckled in.  
  
Secure in Waki’s back seat, Maki and Nico flanked an exhausted Cocoro. It was the only way to get away from the press who were apparently starved for content today. If she was being honest, Maki was feeling pretty worn out herself. It had been fun, but in that whirlwind sort of way that is all excitement and reactions and none of the more personal things. Not a disappointment, time with Nico rarely was, but… not really what she’d been looking for.   
  
“How’re you holdin’ up?” Nico asked, brushing Cocoro’s hair from her face as the younger girl was visibly going through the motions of calming down. Hand on chest, measured breathing, closed eyes with a high brow.   
  
“Onee-chan is really impressive. I don’t know how you two keep up with all that.”   
  
“Exhausting, isn’t it?” Maki agreed, earning a relieved smile from the girl.   
  
“Maki-chan used to have the same problem… until she got coaching from a _real_ professional.”   
  
“The only thing that was pro about you back then was your ego,” Maki sniped back lightly.   
  
Cocoro giggled at Nico’s exaggerated frown which redoubled as she reached over and flicked Maki’s ear. The younger girl fought a losing battle against all out laughter as the two began exchanging pokes and flicks as open warfare broke out between the two. This quickly shifted to the two focusing their efforts from one another on to the younger Yazawa… pretty much like the verbal interplay had gone at the date.   
  
By the time Waki announced they were in the clear and asked if there was anywhere else they’d like to go, poor Cocoro was a red-faced giggling wreck.   
  
“Anywhere? Maybe the hospital for the young lady?” Waki cracked, prompting Maki and Nico to relent their assault.   
  
“How long until you need to get to the airport?” Maki asked Nico, who was rubbing apologetic circles on a gasping Cocoro’s back.   
  
“Nnn… we should probably head back to the apartment. I’ll have enough time to catch Mama coming home from work before I’d need to call the driver.”   
  
“I could wait outside if you like,” Waki offered with a glance at Maki, “If you thought it’d give you girls a little more time.” The woman tapped Nico’s address (easy, because it was one of the saved destinations) and started the trip back.   
  
“You’re coming back with us, Maki-chan?” Cocoro asked, perking up considerably.   
  
“Hey, I thought **_I_ ** was the main event,” Nico teased, leaning into the girl and looping an arm around her shoulders.   
  
“It’s Valentine’s day!” Cocoro argued, somehow immediately shifting the climate in the car from playful rough-housing to silent tension, “You two should be together for it!”   
  
Dead. Silence.   
  
Sure, everyone made _every_ effort to push them toward each other. Less so since Nico had mostly vanished from their private lives and danced off into the limelight. However, that was almost an exclusively private effort. Never spoken out loud when the two were together. The only reason that Maki knew Nico endured the same was because she’d confessed as much. Once. During one of their more intensely honest moments.   
  
Having that kind of statement drop so… so blatantly? With company present?   
  
Neither knew how to react. Maki would have felt _slightly_ better if Nico was showing even half of the fluster she herself was surely blushing out to the world… but instead she just looked uncomfortable. Not even shocked, just...

Just uncomfortable.  
  
Poor Cocoro looked so confused that Maki couldn’t just let things stand as they were. It was clear she was starting to worry she’d done something wrong when really she was just saying exactly what Maki wanted to say herself. Hell, she wanted to get on that plane with her and just… follow her tour. She could catch up on classes later. The lessons would always be there. This was the the exciting first year surge of Nico’s professional idol career!   
  
Even though it had only been a couple seconds, it felt like an hour before Maki gathered the sense to respond with, “Don’t you worry about that. It’s been a great day and I got to see her a lot more than expected already.”   
  
Nico’s eyes were locked on her now. Discomfort lost and traded for intensity. Clearly measuring every word and nuance of expression. Way higher stakes than the news and paparazzi. Crack that crooked smile you know she loves. Crook those eyebrows. Force the playfulness into your voice when you say, “Honestly, I wasn’t even sure I’d get a text with how busy she is these days.”   
  
Nico’s expression remained, her eyes still locked to Maki’s but her voice was light as she said, “There’s a thought. We’ve had cameras aimed at us all evening, but Nico hasn’t posted even one selfie with her best girls!”   
  
The phone was already out, but Cocoro’s face was still tense with worry. That wouldn’t do, so when they huddled into the poor girl’s space, Maki added, “Besides, if she hadn’t snuck all the way out here just to show me up, she’d have a pretty nice surprise waiting for her back at her room.”   
  
Nico hesitated in taking the shot, but Maki absolutely didn’t. The selfie frenzy began as the three ran the gamut of expressions and positions. Some sharable, most not. There was no way that either Nico nor Maki would even consider sharing intentionally awful angle, triple chin face scrunch, goofy nerd faces like these with anyone but each other.

Well, each other and Cocoro, obviously. Maybe a few for the other girls of µ's.

 

\-------------------

  
Nico’s mother was over the moon to see that Maki had accompanied her two eldest. Cocoa had already set to the task to recording every station that Nico could remember seeing on site. Cotaro had all but latched onto Maki’s side from the time they returned until the time she and Nico finally headed back out. Cocoro had shared Line contact info with Maki and both assured the other they’d be in touch, particularly if the younger girl needed to talk about anything she’d be uncomfortable mentioning with anyone else… particularly on topics of romance.   
  
Nico assured Cocoro that any advice that came from Maki would be perfectly acceptable… assuming you always did the exact opposite of what she suggested.   
  
Maki assured Nico that she only gives good advice and that she’s just incapable of following it herself.   
  
“That’s not surprising, you’re kind of a hot mess,” Nico replied.   
  
“... at least I’m hot?” Maki teased back, reading the mood as lighthearted enough to drop the self deprecation for a minute.   
  
“Tch, see Cocoro? This is what I mean,” shoving the taller redhead out the door as the rest of her family laughed, “If you want some real love advice, you come to big sister Nico~”   
  
“She’s already well-versed on how to love you, Nico-chan. Come on, you’re going to be late.”   
  
“Come back soon!” Cocoro, Cocoa, and Mrs. Yazawa called out, with Cotaro chipping in a beat later.   
  
… and then it was just the two of them again. It was getting later in the evening. Nico’s flight wasn’t until midnight. She still had almost two full hours left… but one of those would be spent waiting at the airport and the better part of half of another just getting there.   
  
That’s a lot of time to spend between Nico’s mother’s apartment door and the car where Waki was waiting downstairs. Technically, they should probably already be heading down in case of traffic issues, but Nico’s hand on her wrist stopped her from turning toward the elevator.   
  
She had that look again. Eyes locked, face neutral yet the mood shift was intense. She wordlessly tugged on Maki’s arm and Maki allowed herself to be led to the stairwell. Up the stairs to the roof access, the second they’ll have been on today. Out into the chill winter air. Away from the door and around the side of the access shed. It was cloudy, and the moon was new.   
  
Nico hadn’t let go. Maki was too aware of the woman’s thumb tracing circles on her wrist. Her voice low and quiet, Nico said, “Thanks for today. She was really broken up and… I think this helped.”   
  
“Thanks for letting me. She deserves the best. They all do.”   
  
“So how come I’m the one that keeps getting it? The best, that is.”   
  
“Because you deserve it too, idiot,” Maki replied, just as quiet, but lighter, “You’re one of the hardest working people I know.”   
  
“Eh,” Nico shrugged, staring off at the buildings across the street, “I got lucky. Without you girls, none of this would have happened.”   
  
You girls…   
  
“We were motivated,” Maki shrugged, using her free hand to pat Nico’s arm.   
  
“Motivated and skilled. The world’s going to be a lesser place for not having you on stage, Maki-chan.”   
  
Ah, this again. “It’s not like I’ve quit writing music. You showed me I can do both.”   
  
“No one can have it all, Maki-chan. You can’t be both at your fullest. One suffers for the other.”   
  
“Weird to hear that from you, Ms. Number One Idol in the Universe that takes off the night before her exclusive at the Billboard Live just to cheer up her little sister.”   
  
“I didn’t come here entirely for her…”   
  
“Okay, and who takes the time during that day off to make loads of customized chocolates for her friends.”   
  
“It’s Valentine’s” Nico shrugged.   
  
“... and… still had time left to make me feel not alone today,” Maki allowed. The mood seemed right for it… being honest.   
  
“Maki-chan was feeling lonely?”   
  
“... maybe a little.”   
  
Nico’s hand shifted from her wrist to locked fingers. Her eyes stayed on the horizon. After a moment she mused, “Everyone _did_ kind of pair off, didn’t they?”   
  
“Most of them were already like that, I think. Either way, I’d never come between you and your dream,” Maki felt obligated to say. It was too much. Way… _way_ too much… but Nico squeezed her hand regardless.   
  
“Like I said. Without you, it wouldn’t have happened to begin with. You _enabled_ this dream coming true. You really don’t make any sense sometimes with all this modesty.”   
  
Maki bristled, but only a little. The idea that she didn’t make sense to _Nico_ of all people was… disheartening. If anyone should get such a simple concept… eh… whatever. It didn’t really matter. She had her alone now. Just the two of them. Holding hands on the roof on Valentine’s Day, dressed up and spending their remaining time after their playdate just… being together.   
  
“Are you feeling lonely now?”   
  
“Not at all. Not yet, anyway.”   
  
“You should message me more often. Just because it won’t be Valentine’s Day anymore doesn’t mean that Nishikino Maki should have to feel alone.”   
  
“You’re… kind of busy, Nico-chan. Besides, I’m usually too busy to feel lonely.”   
  
“I’d make time for you. I did today, didn’t I?”   
  
Don’t say things like that... not now, not like this. Sure, she didn’t feel lonely, but this tightness was a different kind of ache. She didn’t want to dab at her eyes because the motion would bring attention, so instead she just squeezed her hand again.   
  
“You did… thank you, Nico-chan.”   
  
“Don’t thank me, dummy. It’s just as much for me as it is for you.”   
  
No jokes. No ribbing. Just soft, dangerous honesty.   
  
“Are you doing alright?” Maki chanced, “Do _you_ get lonely out there?”   
  
Nico finally took her eyes off the sky and turned to watch Maki instead. It was hard to not shy away from that look. Her eyes were watering because, as usual, the feelings surrounding Nico were too intense to be fair.   
  
With a sigh, a shrug, and a ‘can’t be helped’ expression, Nico repeated Maki’s answer, “I’m usually too busy to feel lonely.”   
  
Nico’s free hand found its way to Maki’s forearm, wrapping herself around it as she often did when they stood in the cold. She rested her cheek on Maki’s shoulder and continued, “It’s amazing, you know. Everything is so much fun, but I know it’d be a lot more fun if I could just… bring you with me.”   
  
Bring her. Not µ's. Not the girls. Not her family. Her. Nishikino Maki.   
  
Maki leaned her head to the side, ignoring the way Nico’s hair tickled her nose, “I… think I’d like that.” More than anything.   
  
“Yeah, well I _really_ like this dress. You really blew poor Cocoro’s mind today. Is it new?”   
  
Maki closed her eyes and smiled. Honesty accepted and back to safer topics. She missed this so much. Tomorrow would be pretty tough for how much time she’d spend tonight, thinking about the day over and over.   
  
“Yeah, it’s new. Apparently there’s some events coming up that Mama and Papa wanted to update my wardrobe for. They were _going_ to go with kimono again.”   
  
“They love dolling you up, don’t they?”   
  
“It’s not all that bad,” Maki admitted, “At least I get some input these days.”   
  
“Well I like it. I always prefer my Makis in open-backed dresses.”   
  
“Pfft, you like your Maki in anything.”   
  
“In. Out. It’s all good.”   
  
“You looked pretty good yourself today. You better be careful or you’ll turn Cocoro into a sis-con.”   
  
“I did not consider that and I’m going to pretend I never heard the idea. Besides, I was watching where her eyes were going. That thing _is_ a little low cut. What kind of parties are they taking you to?”   
  
“Don’t know. Don’t really care at the moment.”   
  
“Hmm,” Nico crooned, sounding pretty content, “This was a good idea. I’m glad I did this.”   
  
“If you need to get away for a break, you know you’re welcome anytime.”   
  
“Yeah. I’m pretty sure my agent was pulling out his hair over this. The publicity from the date and the hype it generated for the tour are the only reasons he’s not gonna chew me out when I get back.”   
  
“Are you going to be back at your room at the Hilton?”   
  
“Yeah, we’ll be spending the night there tomorrow as well. Why do you ask?”   
  
“No reason,” Maki smiled knowingly. Her surprise would still be waiting for her after the show. Almost as good as getting the last word.   
  
“Uh huh,” Nico replied, clearly disbelieving, “I guess I’ll find out then… unless you’re coming out because if you are I’d want to know.”   
  
“Exams all day, including cram. I’d much rather be making a trip out to watch your live.”   
  
“Anytime you think you could… let me know? They give me these huge rooms with these stupidly big beds and I don’t know what to do with it all. Half the time I end up sleeping on the couches.”   
  
Maki laughed, “That’s not great for your back, Nico-chan. You need to watch out for that now that you’re getting older.”   
  
“PFFFT. Wow,” Nico managed between the bursts of laughter, “I’ll take your advice to heart, Dr. Nishikino, **_Child_ ** M.D.”   
  
“That crack’s only going to work for another year,” Maki replied with a pout.   
  
“Makes you wish you’d been born two years earlier, eh? You could have had three whole years with Nico in school~”   
  
“Eh,” Maki shrugged, keeping her voice light, “I barely survived _one_ … while you were at ‘peak maturity.’ I don’t know if a younger Nico-chan would have been as interested anyway.”   
  
“Good point… but… I think I…” Nico trailed off and just sighed. She relinquished her hold on Maki’s arm and squirreled under it, shifting to a full hug.   
  
They stayed like that until Maki’s alarm buzzed, letting them know they needed to get moving. Without speaking, the took the stairs hand-in-hand. Kind of murderous with the heels, but they were idols… well… at least one of them still was. They got in the back seat and thanked Waki for her help. They rode in silence, alternating between taking in the scenery as it passed and just… watching one another.   
  
They held hands the entire way to the airport, only letting go when it was time to get out of the vehicle. As Maki climbed out, Nico was waiting, facing her and almost blocking her way. The calm gentle ride in no way preparing Maki for the return of Nico’s intense expression.   
  
“I think you’re right,” Nico replied, breaking the long silence.   
  
“Of course I’m right,” Maki replied, “... what about?”   
  
That earned a momentary smirk, “I wouldn’t change it. How we met. Not even a little. It took Yazawa Nico two full years to be ready for one with Nishikino Maki.”   
  
That hit… _hard._ Maki almost had to take a step back as Nico stepped forward. Deep into her personal space. Noses almost touching as she continued, “I’m a little jealous of the others. Getting to spend all that time with you. Being beside you while you finish growing up. I’m having the time of my life, but at the cost of missing out on yours… and it sucks.”   
  
“Nico-chan…”   
  
“So you had better message me every day from here on out. I’ll be expecting selfies. Obviously I’ll be returning the favor, so count yourself lucky to be receiving such exclusive Yazawa Nico content.”   
  
“... You’re sure you’ll be able to keep up with that promise?” Maki asked, barely able to keep her voice even.   
  
“I’ll do it. Just… just don’t disappear. Don’t like… lose yourself to all this study crap your parents have you doing. Alright? Keep writing music. Keep being a cranky gorgeous trainwreck. Anytime you even _think_ you might be feeling lonely, just sling me a message. Photo bomb my inbox. Something. You think you can do that for me, Maki-chan?”   
  
Maki could only nod. Anything more would have burst the dam and sent all that mascara running down her cheeks… or not. It was pretty high quality stuff, so it’d probably be fine _but that’s not the point._   
  
“Good,” Nico nodded, pecked her on the cheek, and hugged her fiercely, “Honestly, I don’t know how you get by without me.”   
  
“Me either,” Maki breathed, probably too quietly to hear.   
  
“We should do this again. Soon. If my agent and producer and the rest of the team don’t put a leash on me or something.”   
  
There’s a nice thought. Something ridiculous and sexy enough to lighten her mood. “Hey, if you’re looking for that kind of thing, we could go shopping next time.”   
  
Nico pulled away, eyes wide and a smile nearly splitting her cheeks, “Wow. Okay. That’ll be some good press right there. ‘World Famous Yazawa Nico Caught in Sexy Pet Play with former µ's Co-star.’ I think I just learned something new about Nishikino Maki. You should ask Santa for a nice diamond studded one for yourself. Nico can take you for walks~”   
  
“Too far,” Maki laughed, “Always too far.”   
  
Nico made a cats-paw motion toward Maki, “Does Maki prefer puppy or kitty girls? Uh oh! Does Hanayo know you’re secretly Rin’s furry soulmate!?”   
  
“Good night, Nico,” Maki replied with a stern voice and light expression, tapping her wrist as if there was a watch there.   
  
“This is content I need to hear about,” Nico continued to tease as she started walking, “Maybe if you’re lucky I’ll call and you can hear a Nico-Niyao~”   
  
“ _Good night_ , **_Nico_ ** ,” Maki growled, shoulders shaking from silent laughter.   
  
“You’ve been a great audience! Thank you! Thank you! Nico, out! Nico Nico Niiiii~” Nico crowed, gestures and all, as she walked backwards into the entrance and past the laughing security guard before turning around, walking off... and only looking back twice.   
  
… and then she was gone.   
  
“You idiot,” Maki sighed happily, “Happy Valentine’s Day.”   
  
Chest and face still _very_ warm, Maki breathed deep and let it all out.

 

\-------------------

  
  
  
  
More Notes:   
  
Whoo! Got it done in time! I bet the site’s gonna be _flooded_ with some quality _µ's_ content today. I am probably going to try and get some sketches done to add to this. Likely one or two of the selfies. Got one of them started but working this late never ends in satisfactory work.

This is part one of what will be, at least, a three-parter. The next update hits at the end of the month and the third exactly a month from now, because White Day is a thing and honestly, it’s the part I started this story with.  
  
Before you head off to read the next story on your list, we’ve got a brief after-credits scene, so… have fun with that! Thanks for reading!

 

\-------------------

 

Maki climbed into the car’s passenger seat, slumping against Waki’s shoulder.  
  
“Did that go well?” she asked, ruffling the girl’s hair before starting off towards the Nishikino residence, “It looked like it went well,”   
  
“Yeah,” Maki sighed, “This was a good day.”   
  
“You two are really something else, you know that? When I told my sister I’d be dodging paparazzi today, she didn’t believe me.”   
  
“Right? What kind of life is _that_ for a doctor?”   
  
“She wanted me to get Nico-chan’s autograph. Part of me still can’t believe how all that has gone with you and the girls. I have to do a double-take everytime I see her on TV… or that gum commercial comes on.”   
  
Maki groaned and hid her face in Waki’s sleeve, “Uuuuuuuuugh. Don’t remind me.”   
  
“You were so cute. How come I never see you make faces like that normally?”   
  
“The reputation of my friends’ brand isn’t usually relying on my ability to smile like a moron.”   
  
“You should have them over more often. You can’t spend your entire school career studying all the time.”   
  
Maki relented, “You’re… probably right,” before fishing out her phone, bypassing a text from Papa reminding about some kind of interview she needs to attend later in the week, and swiping through the small collection of shots with her, Cocoro, and Nico. They really _did_ look good today.”   
  
“Can you send me the one where you’re all puffing your cheeks out? I swear I won’t share it,” Waki asked with a grin.   
  
“I’ll send it on the condition that you show it to your sister. Proof of the evening. Thank you again for doing this. I know it’s way after hours for you…”   
  
“Anytime, Maki-chan. I’ve been your biggest fan longer than anyone else, after all.”   
  
Maki smiled, snuggled a little closer, and considered just napping the rest of the way home. An itch hit though and soon she was fixing her hair and straightening her dress.   
  
“What’s up, kiddo?”   
  
“Gonna send her a selfie. Maybe two.”   
  
“Cute or sexy?”   
  
“Waki-san!!”   
  
“ _Cute or sexy?”_ _  
_   
“... both?”   
  
“Good girl.”   
  
“ _Waki-san!!”_


	2. Bitter Dark Chocolate

**February 15th**

**_6:50 AM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Yesterday was almost as good as this chocolate. Are you trying to make me fat?  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Good luck at the Billboard Live! Let me know how it goes?  
  
  
  
<Mirror selfie throwing a Nico Nii with her right hand while sticking out her tongue and an arm holding a nesoberi of herself stacked on top of another of Nico>  
  
  
**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** This girl doesn’t need luck!

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Cute with the nesos, but like you’d ever top _me_ .  
  
**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Nice bedhead, by the way. Nico approves of this exclusive Nishikino Maki content.

  


**February 16th**

**_1:50 AM_ **

 

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Man, that was different.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** I think I prefer the bigger crowds for the kind of music I’m running with now. Way more energy.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** It went well, but that’s the kind of venue I want for after I retire from being an idol. More personal and intimate stuff.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Maybe with a sexy redhead at the piano ~.^

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … Do you always work this late? That can’t be good for your health.  
  
  
  
<Mostly under covers selfie, sleepy-bleary glares at phone.>

**_  
Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Oh! Jeez. You better get back to that beauty rest… you could use a few more hours.

**_  
Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ **   <Another selfie, flipping the camera off.>

  
  
  


 

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** You’re seriously making my night here. I love me some late night Maki~  <3

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Here’s a little something to keep you up the rest of the night~  <3  


  
  
  


<Artfully laid out shot of mirror showing Nico’s leg as she removes a stocking>  
  
  
**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** May it serve you well, sleepy, sweet, ’n’ surly.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … I’m glad it went well. Thanks for letting me know.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Get some sleep already. You’re supposed to be back on the road in like… four hours.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** What the hell, Maki-chan. How do you know my schedule better than I do?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_** _Goodnight, Nico._

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** …  <3

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Sweet dreams, sweet thing~  <3 <3 <3 ~

  
  


**_6:45 AM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Did you sleep at all?

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Good morning to you too, you butt.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** I was having this really sweet dream. I was riding roller coasters with you.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** You better have a damn good selfie for me to make up for pulling me out of that.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Sorry! I should have expected you to still be asleep.

 

  
  
  


<Still sleepy looking Maki in front of her bathroom mirror, Nico neso on her head as she does her makeup. Her hair is crazy wild and she’s wearing a Nico tour shirt.>

 

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Starting to think you have more merch of me than I do! Apology accepted.  <3 <3 <3

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** This is the best idea ever, btw. I’m glad I had it.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** You can keep feeding me selfies if you want, but this girl’s goin’ back to sleep.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** I almost got Dream!Maki to say yes to a ferris wheel ride~  <3

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Ferris wheels are boring :P

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** That’s because you’ve never ridden anyone while in one, bb.  <3

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … Crude. As if you speak from experience.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Wouldn’t you like to know?

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** We should try it sometime ~.^

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** I bet Maki’s jealous face is _super_ strong right now.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Nico’s goin’ back to dreamland to ride that face.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** In the ferris wheel.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Have fun studying with _that_ thought runnin’ around that pretty head of yours.

 

  
  
  


<Sleepy looking mischievous Nico biting the middle of her crude cunnalingus hand-sign>

  
  


**_12:45 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m beginning to have a better appreciation of how good we had it as µ's. These girls just can’t get serious… and everything their composer comes up with is so _basic_ .  
  
  
  
<Defeated cheek-on-table long-arm shot, resting on a pile of papers spread out.>

**_  
Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Well, there’s a reason we won.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Not everyone can be the best.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Your selfie game is incredible btw.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Most people would only send like… the best angles.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Everything you’ve sent is so… you. Like, real you.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Messy, work in progress Maki-chan that still takes a girl’s breath away.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Tell Hanayo she can buzz me anytime if she needs help motivating the troops, but honestly you’ve got to let them do what they want. You can’t force them or they’ll just end up bailing.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** BTW, never got back into that dream. You owe me one.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Owe you what?  
  
**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** >;D Ferris wheel ride.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … Are you certain Nozomi isn’t traveling around with you? You’re getting to be as one track mind as she is.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Still no word from them?!

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** My guess is they’ve eloped and went skiing in the Netherlands.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … That visual works really well for them.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** It’s Eli. She just looks great in winter gear.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** … and everything else. Bibi was the best for a reason~

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Three reasons  <3

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Gotta run. New routine we’ve gotta iron out.  


  
  
  


<blowing a kiss selfie>

  
  


**_10:38 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Papa keeps talking about some kind of interview he’s taking me to on Monday, but he keeps avoiding telling me what it’s about.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** How stupid is that?

  
  
  


<hand in palm, bored face selfie>

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** It’s not like him to be so evasive. Kinda freaking me out a little.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I hope you get to bed early tonight. All these late nights can’t be good for your health.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You can’t go burning out after just getting started, idiot.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Eh. You know what you’re doing.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Cocoro finally messaged me back. We’re going to hang out a bit this weekend.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Thought you’d wanna know.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m going to go get some work done on this composition, so the phone’ll be set to DnD.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Sweet dreams and whatever.

  
  


**February 17th**

**_2:15 AM_ **

 

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** I hope this doesn’t wake you up.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Looooong day and this girl is _beat_.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Got in some new support staff that needed to be broken in, and that new dance routine is crazy intense.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Not sure how I’m supposed to keep this pace with the diet they’ve got me on. Where’s the energy going to come from with so few calories, you know what I’m sayin’? There’s barely any Nico there to begin with!

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ **  “Your build is part of your charm. Your primary selling point” they said.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Like Yazawa Nico’s charm can be broken down like that? I was pretty heated at that guy for like, a month after.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Next time I’m in Tokyo, we gotta meet up for something sweet. I’ll cheat on my dietician with you anytime  <3.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** On the plus, there’s this really great masseuse on staff that’s helping to keep me limber and movin’.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** She’s like, a taller, brawnier Umi with this deep laugh and super strong hands.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Kinda like yours, you piano-banging fiend.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** I’m glad Cocoro reached out. I’ve been telling her you wouldn’t mind. No one can read Maki’s passive faces as well as Nico.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Also, your Dad is a butt. Bad communication skills must run in the family.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Two in the morning is an awful time to be up with the munchies. I’m so tired but my stomach is grumbling and keeping me up.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** What would you prescribe, Dr. Nishikino Sexy, M.D.?  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Carbs and sleep. Your dietician is a moron.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Oh shit! I’m sorry I woke you up!

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Please. I’m just getting to bed. The piece needed a _lot_ of work and I still had some cram homework to wrap up.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Maki-chan… what the heck. You’ve been working all this time?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I took a vitamin and coffee break… two hours ago.

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Maki-chan…  


**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** _  
_ _ <selfie of self, looking exhausted, laying surrounded by nesos and a plush panther>  
  
_

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Wow. Maki-chan gets around~

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Maki-chan is everyone’s girlfriend! Wish I could swap out with one of them. Hello Kuro-tan~

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Thanks for the visual snack~ I think I can get to sleep now.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Sweet dreams, Nico-chan.

 

<Another faux-sleep selfie, snuggling the Nico neso>

 

**_Nico2Nii.4Ever:_ ** Sweet dreams, Maki-chan.  <3

 

<wibble-eyed happy Nico selfie>

  
  


**_10:35 AM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Saved this for when it might not wake you up. Wouldn’t want you to be jealous~  
  
  
_< Selfie with Rin, Hanayo, and Cocoro eating super thick'fluffy cute pancakes. They’re hanging all over Cocoro who is winking as she chews.>_  
  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Rin had a pretty good idea on this one. It sounds like I’ll be spending the night at Hanayo’s, which will be a nice change of pace.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Apparently they do this all the time. No surprise there.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Yes, I’m thinking what you’re thinking.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** That’s the biggest breakfast I’ve had since your first concert in Shinjuku. Remember the size of those omelets? It’ll be a bit before I have my daily choco bunny. I’ve been spacing them out so they’ll last the whole month.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You never mentioned the spread waiting for you in your room. _That’s_ why I was in such a hurry to come up with alternative plans when you showed up.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You’re probably busy and Rin’s getting inappropriate, so… later?

  
  


**_3:40 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Kotatsus are dangerous. Just woke up from pancake-induced coma to this.

_  
<Hanayo laying on top of Rin, hand up her shirt, both conked out and half under the kotatsu. Cocoro is very closeby and fuzzy.>_  
  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I must be behind on sleep, because I really want to just pass back out. Probably gonna. It’s cold out there.  
  
_  
_ _< Shot of Maki with extreme bed-head peeking out from beneath the kotatsu covers. Easier to see Cocoro who has conked out and has snuggled up on her arm.>_  
  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** So yeah. You’re out working your butt off and I’m stuffed with pancakes and cooking under the kotatsu. Don’t be too jealous.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Oh god, Rin is making noises.

  
  


**_9:58 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** How come I never send you selfies when my hair is behaving?  
  
_  
_ _< Maki brushing her teeth, bleary-eyed, while Rin is hanging on her>_  
  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** This was supposed to be a ‘do homework together’ visit.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** That’s not happening. Somehow, I don’t care.

  
  


**February 18th**  


**_1:14 AM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Wow. Must be a really busy day on your end.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Hey, next time you swing by, invite your masseuse. My back is killing me. Apparently ‘under the kotatsu’ is not quality back support for sleeping on.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Okay, so like, Oda? She’s the new group’s official song-writer.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** She’s really confident, but, like, not?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** She knows what she likes. That’s clear. She just doesn’t really… push it. You know?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Trying to get her to cut loose with her compositions is like baby steps.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Only the baby keeps crawling back to where it was when you finally lead it to… the place?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m not making any sense. I slept all day! How can I be this tired?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You’d be proud. I ate more than one big meal today.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Your dietician would just love me.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Primarily liquids, mostly coffee. Lots of vitamins.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Doctor diets are really unhealthy. Isn’t that funny?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** But yeah, Hanayo’s father apparently _really_ likes cooking.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** He’s really good at it too.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** So… food coma number two incoming.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Though, that was hours ago… does this count?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** My sleep schedule is aaall fucked up.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Also, I ate my first ‘you’ today.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** So, I’m full of bitter dark chocolate, and you’re all sweet strawberry cream?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … That’s fair.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You were delicious.  <3

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Sweet dreams when you get around to seeing this.

  
  
  
  
**_3:12 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Took long enough.

 

_ <Shot of Rin struggling with homework as Hanayo is scribbling away. Maki in foreground with a hushing finger to her lips> _

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You can really hear the gears turning.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Sorry that this turned into less of a ‘when I’m lonely’ thing.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** It’s surprisingly fun.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Now I know why you and Nozomi were always texting nonstop.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Oh god, if you were that crude with me, I can’t imagine your conversations with _her._

  
  


**_8:55 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Home at last.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I love those two, but I am _beat._

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Really not looking forward to class tomorrow.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Honoka has been dragging her feet about a _lot_ of the succession details regarding the student council president position.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** It’s stressing out my VP, who I’m not sure you’ve ever met. Her name is Ueno Fumie. Super helpful. She actually just transferred in this year. We actually had enough transfers that we have three classes in our year now.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m rambling.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m going to get a little time in on the piano before I crash. There’s a piece I’ve been floating around that I’d like to finally get on paper.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’ll send you a link when I get a recording uploaded.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** It might not be your thing, but this is definitely a more personal, Nishikino Maki, sound.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Don’t work too hard. :P  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Also, I caught your interview. It’s always weird seeing you on this end of the camera.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You look too put together. I don’t get how you manage that with how much of a mess I know you are.  <3

  
  


**February 19th**

**_11:55 AM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Not sure why, but it kind of bugs me that you haven’t met Fumie.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** This is her. She’s pretty much how I think Papa would want me to be.

 

_ <Across room shot of Fumie, Maki’s hand pointing her out in the foreground> _

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Speaking of Papa. It’s Monday and I _still_ have no idea what this interview thing is about.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** He’s being super weird about it.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Weirder still is Mama is like, quiet about it. Like she’s not really happy with whatever it is. I think she’s mad at him? That never happens, so… awkward?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Wish me luck, loser.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Via text maybe so I know you didn’t just drop your phone in some hotel somewhere?

  


**_5:55 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Remember this?

 

_ <Maki, Sailor Moon posing with her tongue out and a bored expression, wearing the dress from V-Day> _

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I might not know what tonight’s about, but at least I’ll look amazing while I’m at it.  


  


**_6:37 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Can I call?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Please?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Kind of an emergency.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** This is a nightmare and I need you to talk me down.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m in the bathroom and I’ve only got a minute or two, but I’m seriously losing it here.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** It’s a miai. Papa arranged a fucking engagement interview of all things!

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** What the hell!?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I don’t want this at all! I don’t get why this is happening!

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Who even does this kind of thing anymore!?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Actually, nevermind. I’ll get in touch after.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** After I get through this. If I talked to you now I’d probably start crying and that wouldn’t end well.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Where are you?

  
  


**_9:58 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Well… that was horrible.  


< _Mirror selfie of one miserable Maki. Runny mascara, puffy eyes, messy hair_ >  


**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Easily one of the worst nights I think I’ve ever had.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m stuck going on a few ‘exploratory’ dates with the guy, but there’s seriously no chance.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** The guy has never even heard of µ's. How could I ever be with someone who doesn’t know that much!?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** He wasn’t even interested in finding out!

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Plus, he’s like… eighteen years older than me!

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** How is that alright? That age difference is older than I am!

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Hey...

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Can I talk to you tonight?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Hearing your voice would help a lot right now.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** How could I tell any of the others about this kind of thing?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I really feel like you’re the only one who’d get this…

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** At least who’d get how _I’d_ feel about it.

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I hate this so much.

  
  


**_11:49 PM_ **

 

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Still busy?  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I don’t want to call until you give me the okay…

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m going crazy over here. My eyes hurt and the house is empty.  
  
  
< _Huddled under covers, knees to chest selfie_ >  
  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I hate being like this… but can I call?

**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Please?

  


As midnight rolled over, Maki curled around the phone and pulled at her hair. A quick check showed that Nico hadn’t replied to anything since _very_ early Saturday morning. Nothing since before the breakfast with Cocoro and RinPana. Another stab to an already free-falling heart. Nico had said to message her when she felt lonely. She couldn’t remember a time since before µ's that she’d come even close to feeling this isolated.

It’s like Papa hadn’t realized that the old plan just wouldn’t work anymore… or worse, this had always been his intention. Pretend the miracle of last year had been a passing whim to be forgotten and then get back to the grind. Either way, she would have to make him realize that there _was_ no going back.  
  
They’d… _left her with him._  
  
Sure, they were on call, so it made sense. Still… she was there on display as part and parcel of access to the family name. He knew _nothing_ about her in advance outside of what she looked like. He didn’t even seem inclined to learn! No questions. No real discussion. He just… regurgitated facts about her… _at her_ … from a print-off he’d been handed. Then he just waited for her to acknowledge that those statements were true.

They ate in silence. He complimented her appearance, which… felt really off-putting given the enormous age difference and the intention of the get-together suggesting… certain “eventual” activities. He praised her demeanor (which at the time was her most conservative ‘I don’t want to make the family look bad’ silence) and said he looked forward to their next meeting.  
  
Then his driver drove her home. She sat in the back seat. He sat in the front. Again, in near silence as the man whose name she didn’t even want to think of gave only the most bare-bones direction to the driver.

There was no one waiting for her at home.

There was no one she felt comfortable telling about just how unbearably awful she felt… that she hadn’t already texted anyway.

So she cried. She shucked off the dress she’d **_deeply_ ** regretted wearing. A kimono would have given less for his eyes to lock on. She threw on her most childish pajamas and hid under the covers until she’d calmed down enough to maybe be able to talk again… and tried Nico on Line.

To which… still no answer.

Assuming that Nico must be at an event, Maki checked her mailboxes and rechecked her online calendars and the schedules on Nico’s homepage, welcoming the distraction and preferring the frustration over the crushing depression.  
  
Nothing new… except that the last place she checked, Nico’s Line homepage, a repository of selfies, motivational memes, and idol gossip, was now _literally_ nothing. Just a single, “There are no shared moments, yet.”  
  
The heat of her frustration froze in an instant. Raw, heart-in-throat, floor-dropped-out-from-under, vertigo-inducing despair. Facebook. Completely gone, but the previous conversation in the messenger still displayed her name in bold, just without a link. Instagram. Set to private. Twitter… flat out confirming what the other accounts merely suggested, “You have been blocked from this account at the request of the user.”  
  
This is… this was impossible. This couldn’t be real. Reloading the page didn’t change the message. Logging out and logging back in… same thing. The room was filled with the sound of a steadily increasing pace of “No… no no no no no!”  
  
She couldn’t see the screen anymore. She heard her own gasp between sobs before she even realized she was crying. “What did… Where!?… where did I fuck up?” Maki gasped, doubled over to curl around the phone, “Why did… what did I?”  
  
It couldn’t have been the Valentine’s spread at her room… Nico didn’t even mention it! They talked for _days_ after that. The last thing she’d sent was a selfie to show how happy she was since words wouldn’t suffice! This couldn’t be right... but Maki couldn’t think of an alternative reason, particularly after the evening she just had.  
  
Ravaging her lower lip, she fumbled with the phone to close all of the social media apps and cut to the chase. She tapped her way to dial Nico’s phone, trying to get her breathing out of control… but knowing that as soon as she heard her voice it’d all just come back out anyway. At least then she’d be able to talk to her… find out what happened.  
  
One ring… immediate redirect to an automated voicemail message stating that her call was coming from a blocked number and that her call would be directed to an un-associated mailbox.  
  
It felt like the wind had been sucked from her chest. A quick check to her contact on Nico’s team, a choreographer named Kurashima Hiro, displayed the same level of desolate Line homepage. Messaging him would be pointless.  
  
Why would they both block her simultaneously? Had he been discovered as a leak of some kind? The timing made no sense! _Why couldn’t she reach Nico!?_  
  
Growling in frustration at the pathetic whining she was having trouble restraining amidst the tears, she broke her self-imposed decision to avoid contacting Eli while she was out doing... whatever she was with Nozomi. Straight to calling. No time for text. If anyone could help her right now, that she’d feel at all comfortable asking… it’d be reliable, affectionate Eli.  
  
Three rings. Standard voicemail message. Eli’s voice, but as comforting as watching an old interview… not what she needed right now. Maki hung up without leaving a message. Her voice would be unintelligible anyways. Doubling down, she tried Nozomi. The number was no longer in service.  
  
It was almost midnight… she _couldn’t_ bother Nico’s mother at this hour. All the other girls would be long asleep. The impossibility of the blocks began to sink in. There’s… there’s just no way. The bag of chocolate on her bedside table was _proof!_ _Of course_ Nico would never…

But she had.

Maki pulled a Nico bunny from the bag, stomped wobbily to her desktop, powered it up and tried to wipe the stupid stream of liquid sad from her face. That’s right. This wasn’t the time for feeling sad, alone, or isolated. This was time to get fucking _angry_ . _Someone_ was keeping her from Nico, and she _really_ needed to talk to her. _Right now._  
  
As expected, after sending quick messages to the email addresses saved on her phone, she received:  
  
**Subject** : Delivery Failure (Blocked)

 

Delivery to the following recipient failed:

  OGNico2koNii@gmail.com

 

The recipient has chosen not to receive email from you.  
  
**Subject** : Delivery Failure (Not Found)

 

Delivery to the following recipient failed:

  2koloves-muse-ic4ever@docomo.ne.jp

Contact not found.  


Undeterred, Maki clicked her way to some old chat logs between her and Nico that she’d saved to separate .doc files. Bypassing the well-labeled documents holding particularly moving conversations, she popped open one of their earlier conversations on gchat where they admitted the old usernames and email addresses that they would be too embarrassed to share. It took Nico four admissions before Maki relented and revealed her old emo chuuni-riffic d@rkest.be4theend address.  
  
The reason behind this was Nico’s own admission that she still checked these addresses from time to time. Sure this was well over a year ago, which for them was a lifetime, but… it was _something._  
  
There were two docomo addresses that had immediate bounce-backs, another gmail that shockingly also had the blocked message… and one that gave no reply at all. Kicksmilegrl95@gmail.com, based on an old retired idol group that never really made it big, but had deeply influenced Nico’s original stance on what an idol should be.  
  
No bounceback… meaning either she’d just stopped checking it so there was no need to even think about blocking her on it… or it was left open intentionally. Obviously that could just be wishful thinking… but finding a potential line of communication filled Maki with determination. She popped the Nico bunny into her mouth and typed.

  
  
**From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** What happened!?

 

_I hope you’re still checking this email address. What the hell happened!? I’m blocked on all of your other accounts. Something terrible happened today and I really need to talk to you._

_Please call.  
  
_

Maki stared at the message, knowing it was too direct. Knowing it was too needy sounding… but just couldn’t find the pride to care. Somehow, she never considered the idea that her time with Nico could be finite. Limited, sure… but a full expiration date? No way. Unacceptable. She clicked send, leaned back in her chair, and dragged her Nico nesoberi off the desk to curl around.

She wouldn’t sleep much that night.  
  


 

**February 20th**

**_7:30 AM_ **

 

Still no response.

After hours of re-watching old live recordings and PVs to comfort herself, Maki had managed to get about an hour and a half of shut eye. Her morning routine made her doubly grateful for the attention she’d paid to getting quality foundation and cover. She looked _terrible._ Even after all the cover-up, she still looked like she’d pulled an all-nighter… just not an all-nighter spent crying.

Her parents hadn’t come home last night. That wasn’t unusual, but there was an intense, bitter conviction in Maki as she hoped it was because they were too afraid to face up to the consequences of yesterday. Almost guaranteed to not be true, but… it’d be nice if they felt bad about it and wouldn’t force her through the follow-up “dates.”  
  
… there was so much homework she hadn’t done.

Ugh.

Maki made a beeline straight for the club room upon arriving at Otonokizaka. She was running a little behind and she knew that Hanayo and Rin liked to spend some time preparing for the day there. She needed to tell someone. This was too much to handle on her own. Her time with the girls forced her to face how inadequate her coping methods were. Time and time again, each and every one of them had bridged the gap she tried to maintain and proved themselves to be every bit the family she’d always hoped for.

She just didn’t want to bother them last night, especially so late. Hanayo was definitely one who needed her rest, Rin had trouble with early morning as it was, Honoka would have just slept through the ringer, Umi… would have probably tried to help, but she had a strict sleep schedule she didn’t want to interfere with and Kotori would have just been starting evening classes.

Last night was just a fluke.

The halls were particularly loud this morning. A lot of laughter, which actually helped lighten Maki’s heart a bit, though for some reason the door to the club room was locked. The girls must be running late… or already headed back to homeroom. Either way, she had some things she wanted to drop off, so she whipped out her key and opened the door.  
  
Rin and Hanayo were there.

Kayo-chin was sitting on the table, facing the windows which had their curtains drawn. Rin was facing her, straddling the girl’s leg, one hand in Kayo-chin’s hair, the other lost under her skirt. They had been kissing, but upon the door opening, Kayo-chin twisted around, shock on her face. Her blouse was partially unbuttoned.  
  
Rin stopped mid… whatever she was doing with her hips, her face flushed. Her eyes locked with Maki’s, surprise and then something deeper, angrier on her face. She glared and shouted, “You… wha!? G-get out!”  
  
So Maki slammed the door and ran. Heart pounding, surrounded by smiling, laughing students, she ran full-speed. A teacher called out to stop running in the halls, but she was too far gone to slow down now. She needed to get to the student council room. _Now_ . The only people who should be there at this time would be Umi and Honoka… or better yet, nobody.  
  
This was too much after last night. She couldn’t breathe. Her mind replaying the moment, that briefest glimpse, over and over. Shame, frustration, and... jealousy? The council room was thankfully empty, so Maki shut the door behind her and raced around to and crouched behind the desk. Nico was right… she _was_ a trainwreck. Her control was slipping and… and the _anger_ in Rin’s voice.

Rin! Angry at _her_ . Kayo-chin’s face locked in shock and fear. The hungry abandon before they realized the door had opened.  
  
It was too much… it was all too much.  
  
Maki heard the door open and before she realized it, she had covered her ears and hid her face between her knees. She hadn’t done this in _years_ , but for some reason the old “hide from the ghost” position had come back on reflex. She scooted closer to the desk and leaned against it, clenching her eyes shut and hoping whoever it was would just… go away.  
  
The embarrassment of being caught like this… _at school_ ? It would be too much to bear. So, she curled tighter and tried to think of anything besides the scene she’d just run away from.  
  
The feather-light touch at her knee sent a shock through her, making her scurry back and futility try to hide how much she’d started crying. Her vision was blurry, but enough to pair colors with the patient tone in the figure’s inquisitive, “Maki?”  
  
Umi.  
  
“Maki? What’s wrong?”  
  
Maki replied, barely a whisper, pitched and broken, “Don’t tell anyone… please?”  
  
“Don’t tell anyone what? It’s okay,” she assured, though she was gesturing above the table. Someone else must have been in the room because the door snapped closed.  
  
“I… she… and they…” Maki tried, but her overstressed mind wasn’t putting the words together properly, nor was it separating the numerous horrible things the past twenty-four hours had brought. Instead, she just gave up on words and hid her face again. There were few people she’d allow this with… _very few_ … but Umi was very near the top of that list.  
  
_No one_ had as similar a perspective to last night’s parental-created situation like Umi did. The hand on her knee and the calm, patient assurance of, “We’re here. I’m here,” paired with the arms wrapping around her from behind (that mild sweet scent immediately identifying her as Honoka) set the last of her tension loose. This was her family.  
  
“We love you, Maki-chan,” Honoka whispered, “Take all the time you need…”  
  
Maki slumped back and just let the tears roll. She grasped Umi’s hand, pulling her close enough to hug onto the older girl’s arm, wiping her face on her blazer sleeve. The sheer _relief_ she felt almost got her sobbing again.  
  
“I’m sorry,” Maki managed, “I just need a minute…”

… and they waited. The bell rang, signalling the start of homeroom, but still they waited. It sounds dramatic, but it literally felt like Honoka’s arms were banishing the misery that had collected overnight. They may be spread out, but they hadn’t forgotten. They were all still together somehow.  
  
She’d never really told them how much µ's meant to her.  
  
How much _they_ meant to her.  
  
Why would you need to if they weren’t ever going away?  
  
“Thank you… I’m sorry about this,” Maki sighed, running through the obligatory response to a situation like this before continuing, “I… had a very long night.”  
  
“Would you like to talk about it?” Umi offered.  
  
“I’m not sure where to start,” Maki murmured, the after-cry emptiness making it far easier to sort her thoughts.  
  
“Start from the beginning? What did you spend last night doing?” Umi prompted.  
  
After a moment of deciding what to share and what to hide, Maki admitted, “... Papa dropped me off at an engagement interview last night.”  
  
Umi’s sharp intake of breath and tightened grasp was _beyond_ vindicating. Honestly, as the night had gone on, she wondered if she had overreacted… but if Umi found it off-putting, then…  
  
“ _Dropped you off_ ?” she replied, “That’s… _highly_ irregular.”  
  
“They were on call… but still. I didn’t even know what we were driving to.”  
  
Umi drew steel with her voice, “... did he behave himself?”  
  
“As well as any man could, I suppose,” Maki replied, “I was wearing the dress from Valentine’s Day. It’s kind of low cut.”  
  
“You _are_ really pretty, so I guess he was checkin’ you out then, huh?”  
  
“Honoka…” Umi sighed, “... Tell me the rest. As much as your comfortable with. Take all the time you need.”  
  
… so she did. Start to finish, she relayed everything, all the way until after she’d shucked the dress and went pajama mode. Everything before… well… Nico. The only times she had to stop was when Honoka would ask why a point here and there was important, which Umi would tactfully and accurately explain.  
  
“That is… that isn’t a miai at all, Maki-chan. Whoever arranged that should be ashamed of themselves. There’s a process to these things… at least he didn’t take advantage of the situation.”  
  
Maki shuddered, not even allowing the thought to process, “There is that…”  
  
“So, that aside… are you considering it?”  
  
The comfort chilled.  
  
“What?” Maki replied.  
  
“The engagement. Do you think it’s something you’d consider with him?”  
  
Maki stared, disbelieving that it would even be in question, “... _No._ ”  
  
“Good. If he’s going to be involved with such a shoddy arrangement, it’s for the best. I’m shocked he wasn’t aware of your resume beforehand,” Umi sighed before continuing, “I can give you advice on how to handle these things in the future if you’d like. I’ve been to a few myself and they can be very stressful.”  
  
The chill seeped in deeper, “You have? But… I thought... “  
  
“There are appearances to maintain for people in our positions, Maki-chan,” Umi interjected, making eye contact with Honoka who had also stiffened behind her, “Regardless of our personal feelings on the matter, there is an expectation for the effort to be made. Access to families such as ours is deeply desired and sought after. Presenting an opportunity allows both for that prestige to be expressed and to, at times, create the connections that will increase that standing.”  
  
Just as Maki’s heart felt like it would finish it’s double-knot, Umi laid her hand on Maki’s once more and finished with a smile, “... At the end, you can always turn them down as is your right. Don’t forget that the power will _always_ be in your hand. You are _Nishikino Maki_ . Unique. Irreplaceable. They may be there because of your name, but they will always fail because they’ll forget to appreciate the real treasure that you are.”  
  
… and there were the waterworks again. A sobbing, worn-out Maki, sandwiched between two of the greatest friends anyone could ever have.  
  
“That’s why we’re all betting on Nico, you know. If anyone gets that, it’s her,” Honoka added.  
  
Dagger twist, sobbing doubled. Two very confused third years. Umi and Honoka shared a look, realizing that this was going to take _way_ longer than expected.

 

**_12:02 PM_ **

 

Hanayo looked up from her phone, her face grim. The five µ's alumni remaining at Otonokizaka were gathered in the clubroom, surrounding a very exhausted Maki who had yet to actually attend class. Maki had to hand it to Kayo-chin and Rin… they didn’t give any outward sign that anything had happened earlier.  
  
“I can see her accounts just fine,” Hanayo admitted, “... and there’s nothing on any of of these suggesting anything is wrong.”  
  
“She wouldn’t say anything was wrong publicly,” Maki replied distantly, the news was expected but still left her feeling hollowed out, “That would be way too unprofessional.”  
  
Umi nodded in agreement, but still looked perturbed. Honoka, who had remained attached to Maki since this morning brightened, “That’s great! We’ll just message her and ask what happened!”  
  
“I don’t want her to have to block any of you,” Maki warned, “I’m sure none of this would have happened without a good reason. She… shouldn’t be completely isolated from _all_ of us.”  
  
“Then I’ll do it,” Honoka replied with a grimace, pulling out her phone, “We don’t talk much online anyways, so if she blocks me right away, we’ll have a better idea of what’s going on with no real loss. Uhh… what’s my password again?  
  
“This is why you should just use your phone for this instead of bouncing between it and your PC,” Umi groaned.  
  
“It’s alright! Just gimme a sec to change it again. … Now what email was attached to this?”  
  
“Tch, just… give it here,” Umi sighed, freeing Honoka to fully re-latch onto Maki who was impressing/worrying everyone with how tolerant she was being about it. What they didn’t know was she wasn’t just being tolerant, she was relying on it. It was good that Kayo-chin wasn’t blocked… but it raised way too many concerns at being singled out. _Way_ too many.  
  
Almost as bad as being blocked was facing her own reaction to it. Even she couldn’t ignore the significance of being so thoroughly wrecked that she was skipping classes, losing sleep, and ignoring homework. She’d cried more in the past night than she had in the past year… and wonderful as last year was, it was pretty stressful! She really had been fooling herself if she thought she was going to be able to keep going like this.  
  
Maki was… pretty sure she wasn’t romanticizing her memories of the night in the park, the night after Snow Halation, that walk before the Love Live!, sightseeing in New York… and more recently Valentine’s Day. This was beyond flirting. She knew that. She… she knew her feelings and she was pretty close to being certain of Nico’s own.  
  
She _knew_ she loved Nico… but she also loved _all_ of µ's. Each and every one of them. That’s why it hurt so much that Rin wouldn’t meet her eyes and that Hanayo had yet to speak to her directly. Why she cherished the late night updates from Kotori, who always found the most over-the-top outfits to send her shots of. Why the complete disappearance of Eli and Nozomi had been such a perpetual sore-spot for her.  
  
But this? This was **_way_ ** more intense than that. She couldn’t even _consider_ losing Nico forever without her heart trying to implode. This was the real deal. This was move-in-together, footsie-under-the-kotatsu, breakfast-together-every-morning, share-a-bed, death-till-us-part levels of love. This was agape and eros waltzing on the grandest stage to music forged in her heart, written specifically just to hear her sing again.  
  
She’d (finally) come to this conclusion around the time she should have been sitting in her second class of the day. Instead, she spent it being gently rocked back and forth as the realization helped her find hidden reserves for her stupid eyes to cry out. Honoka always managed to impress. Yuhiko was a really lucky kid to have her as a sister. She was surprisingly patient when it came to things like this.

Well… patient and _dangerous_ … being stuck alone with her in such a vulnerable state was making it hard to remember the concept of discretion. Honoka had, in the time before this lunch period, managed to pull more information out of her about how she felt about Nico than she’d previously acknowledged herself.  
  
Maki would be royally pissed if it wasn’t all such a massive relief to finally admit. Besides, Honoka swore secrecy… and even though she expected she’d break that vow to Umi, at least Umi wouldn’t spread it any further… than maybe Kotori…  
  
Shit.  
  
“Alright! I’m in!” Honoka cheered. She tapped away as Umi shook her head and grinned victoriously as she hit send.  
  
“This should work, assuming she doesn’t have any staff handling her social media,” Hanayo assured, “Which is the only reason I can assume this would have happened.”  
  
Still facing away, Rin asked, “Well, if Maki was blocked, why not all of us? We’re all Nico-chan’s friend too.”  
  
“I’ll… explain that to you later,” Hanayo assured, stepping closer to Maki and squeezing her shoulder reassuringly, “Unless there’s something you can think of out of the usual?”  
  
Of course she thought of it. It had been one of the first reasons for the shut-out that Maki considered. Her tongue still loosened by Honoka’s probing and the rest of her too worn out to care, Maki replied, “Well… I _did_ work through a member of her staff to lay out this big western-style Valentine’s Day spread that was supposed to be waiting for her after work. Chocolates, flowers, a plush panther and rabbit… so… ”  
  
Rin was looking at her now. All of them were. Wide-eyed and varying levels of pride/excitement.  
  
“... What?”  
  
Wibble-eyed, Honoka snuggled closer, “That… is so sweet…”  
  
“I had no idea…” Umi added with a hint of awe.  
  
“I didn’t know you two were that far along, nya!?” Rin glowed, practically vibrating.  
  
“... Yeah. That would do it,” Hanayo finished, the only one that looked sad about the news, “As far as her team would be concerned, you’re probably the most dangerous thing to Nico-chan’s career.”  
  
The other girls stared, waiting for clarification.  
  
“Really? Did none of you pay attention to a word she said last year?” Hanayo groused. Being the club president had been really good for her and her confidence. Winning the Love Live! hadn’t hurt either. Leaning fully on the table, Hanayo continued, “The number one threat to an idol’s career is betraying the hearts of their fan-base by dating!”  
  
“But we weren’t ‘far along’ at all… We’ve never done anything that…” Maki began.  
  
“Nico-chan disappeared the night before a big show and appears all over the news by going out with her sister and the girl who _everyone_ assumed she used to be dating in secret. On _Valentine’s Day._ You understand how that looks, right?”  
  
“But… doesn’t everyone know about all of us?” Rin asked, looking around the room for support, “Everyone loved us despite knowing that we were all together!”  
  
“ _We weren’t together_ ,” Maki insisted before Hanayo continued.  
  
“There’s a difference in fan theory and visible practice… and the rules are very different for school idols than they are for professionals. Since her team saw a gesture like that on the back-end…”  
  
“That begs the question then,” Umi interjected, “Who was the one that actually blocked Maki? Was it Nico herself protecting her career or was it her staff.”  
  
“I wonder if she even knows about it,” Honoka mused aloud.  
  
“There’s no way,” Maki growled, taking everyone off guard with the vehemence in her voice, “Nico-chan _wouldn’t_ do that. Not to _me_ , not to _any_ of us.”  
  
“Maki-chan has a lot of faith in Nico-chan~” Rin teased, but visibly backed away when Maki turned to her.  
  
“ _None_ of us would do that to _any_ of us. Retired or not, _we are µ's.”_  
  
“Yikes,” Honoka piped in, “Sorry. That’s really sweet Maki-chan, but yeah. I’m blocked now too.”  
  
“Staff then,” Hanayo replied.  
  
“So what do we do?” Rin asked, looking stricken.  
  
“We don’t do anything,” Maki assured, “Not a thing. She’s not losing any more of us because of me.”  
  
“It’s not like that and you know it,” Umi frowned, but was met in kind.  
  
“I’m _not_ making her choose between the career she’s worked her _entire life_ for and… and a… a stupid over-emotional _second-year high school student_ . I’ve waited this long… I can wait a little longer. She’ll come back eventually... “  
  
The others stared, but Maki met their gaze defiantly, certain that her stance was the correct one.

  


**_11:42 PM_ **

  
_… I’m glad they didn’t argue with me. I was barely keeping it together at that point. I understand their caution… but cutting us apart without even letting you know? Show business is crueler than I’d imagined._

_So… this is how I’ll handle the wait. I’ll write you every day, even though I’m pretty sure you stopped checking this address years ago. It’ll be interesting, being this open and honest with you. This, what’s happening now, is exactly why I held back all this time… well, this and that I’m clearly a coward._

_There’s bigger things that I’m afraid of now. I scared I’ll never get to spend time with you the way we used to. Scared you’ll never know how I really felt. Scared I’ll somehow be forced to settle for anyone that isn’t you. Scared… that you’ll find someone else. Really, I’m scared of that more than anything._

_For me, it can’t be anyone besides you. I’m not good with this sort of thing, and I don’t think I could share my life with anyone who wasn’t part of last year. It changed my life, which sounds cheesy, but… I’m absolutely serious. There’s no going back for me now. Sure, I’m going to keep working toward being a doctor, but I can’t give up music completely. I can’t anymore than I could give up you._ _  
_ _  
_ _So… I guess I’ll talk at you tomorrow. Hanayo’s going to keep me up to date on your schedule since I can’t see most of your usual early-notice methods anymore. Hopefully a pathetic, needy Maki isn’t too offputting to you._

_  
\-----------------_

Maki hesitated, wiped her eyes and finished the message.

_\-----------------_

_I love you._

_Idiot._

_\-----------------_

Maki clicked send and dropped the record of her day into what may as well be the void. She definitely felt better though. Maybe this is the feeling that some people got from keeping a diary. No matter the case, this was a way she could direct these thoughts to Nico… as long as she had this outlet, she’d be alright. She was still connected.  
  
Her phone buzzed.  
  
Heart in her throat, Maki scrambled back to her bed where she’d left it plugged in and swiped her way to her messages.  
  
  
**_Papa_ ** _: Sorry we keep missing you. There’s another candidate we’d like to introduce you to on Thursday. Your mother will catch up with you tomorrow. Looking forward to hearing how things went.  
  
_

Maki glared at the screen, grateful that it was bitter anger rising instead of her spirit sinking. Like Umi said, the power to reject would always be her’s. She might not be ready to admit to her parents her complete lack of interest in a male partner, but that didn’t mean she would tolerate this sort of thing with exams looming.  
  
Maki flopped onto the bed and rested her Nico nesoberi on her chest, smirking at it’s ridiculous smile, “You better be ready to listen to me rant a lot. I have a feeling there’s going to be a lot of reading for you to catch up on once you stop being an idiot and notice I’m gone.”  
  
She reached to her bedside table and pulled out one of Nico’s “Maki” bunnies. This one had heart eyes and kissy lips… which honestly looked a little weird. Still. This was proof. Everything she’d ever done was more than enough to convince her. _Of course_ Nico felt the same.

Maki popped the piece in. If she only had one a day, she’d make it to the end of the month before she ran out. As long as she had these, waiting would be a breeze. For someone as obsessive about checking her phone as Nico, there’s no way it would be that long before she got suspicious of how silent Maki had been, particularly after how _good_ their conversations had been up until that point.

She could do this.  
  
She had to.

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes:**

Eventually, these selfie captions will be swapped out for actual sketches because I want to. Since there’s a time factor here, it’ll sit as is for now until I can get back to it.

Also, extending this to a 4-chapter dealie, because nothing can ever be a simple one-shot. All this? This was supposed to just be the White Day story two chapters from now! Now I’ve got to go and re-write most of it!!


	3. Strawberry Creme

**February 21st**

 

**_6:50 PM_ **

 

 **From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** Candidate #2 Tomorrow

 

 _Apparently the last guy tried to push up the date of our next “meeting.” Waki let me know. She seems just as uncomfortable with the whole thing as I am, which is impressive. I hate everything about this whole process._ _  
_ _  
_ _Umi talked to me a bit today about how these things are normally supposed to go and now I get why she was so put off. My parents were supposed to be there, I was supposed to be notified way in advance and received information information about him as well. I don’t get what my father was thinking. I’m… planning on talking to him about it today. I’m not looking forward to that, but you always said I needed to do a better job of standing up for myself when it comes to him._ _  
_ _  
_ _They left the next man’s portfolio on the kitchen counter. Apparently they came and left last night without stopping by my room. I probably would have noticed them if I hadn’t been plugged into the Yamaha. I recently started working on new personal project and I’ve been kind of obsessed with it. Anyway, they’re a CEO of a materials transport corporation. It’s a pretty recognizable name, but I’m not supposed to share information like that. He’s even older than the last one._ _  
_ _  
_ _Like, by a lot. Big and tall, too._ _  
_ _  
_ _Can you imagine me with some old guy? Piano lesbian with a bald fat man. I actually spent half the day thinking it would serve me right for waiting so long to tell you how I feel. As if I deserved all the chances I already had._

 _I told myself I wouldn’t make all of these emotional rants about how I feel about you, because if you ever DID read them, your ego would expand to consume the planet. I’m surprised it hasn’t already. I’m also going to try and avoid being too self deprecating, which isn’t going to leave much to say since those two topics are most of what’s on my mind._ _  
_ _  
_ _Knowing there’s a good chance you’ll never read this is making it much easier to just say things like I mean… which is stupid and frustrating and indicative of most of my issues with people._

_Oh. Good. They’re home. I’ll let you know how this goes. I’m going to say what’s on my mind irl now._

_\-----------_

 

Maki clicked send, stood, and double checked herself in the mirror. If she was going to do this, she was going to look as much of the adult that they were apparently expecting her to be. She’d prepped _hard_ , going for stern authoritarian in pin-stripes. Hip hugging pencil skirt, mildly flourished sleeveless blouse, gloves, stockings, hair bun set high and tight. She even broke out the reading glasses, accentuating the dangerous edge she’d winged her eyelashes to.  
  
It was a style so hilariously _not her_ that she almost laughed. The only thing preventing it was the knowledge that neither of them would see anything odd about her outfit. Neither of them knew her well enough to tell what was or was not common behavior or appearances. Another revelation that making real friends drove home.

After grabbing a chocolate Nico bunny, Maki chewed and walked briskly, reached the bottom of the stairs just as her parents were halfway down the hall to the kitchen. Distantly, she felt annoyed that neither had called out that they were home after ensuring she had the practice so thoroughly instilled, but it was a drop in the ocean at this point. She stalked after them, offering a conversationally flat, “Welcome home.”  
  
Her mother jumped. Her father turned with a rare pleased expression on his face that only broadened as he took in her appearance and replied, “Maki. I was glad to hear that your interview with Mr. Nokura went well. He mentioned that he’s looking forward to the follow-up, though I’d recommend you not mention the others to him. It tends to make them uncomfortable.”  
  
“I would imagine,” Maki deadpanned, “I found the folder for candidate number two.”  
  
“Oh, Hishiki? He’d actually be the third, though I feel that he comes in first in terms of consideration. The Hishiki family has deep ties to the Nishikinos already and this would cement a full merger of our interests regarding supply chain between Tokyo and Yokohama.”  
  
He turned as he spoke, fishing through his briefcase. Maki locked eyes with her mother, who was apparently observant and aware enough to recognize the venom building in her daughter. The woman bit her lip as her father crossed the distance and handed Maki a manilla envelope, “ _This_ would be candidate number two and your interview for tomorrow. Weigh him carefully. While he has considerable holdings in multiple pharmaceutical firms throughout the Tokyo Bay, he’s young and a little hot headed.”  
  
“Is he now?” Maki replied, accepting the envelope without taking her eyes off of the man. The slow simmering anger was making it much easier to stand her ground.  
  
“Nothing I imagine you couldn’t handle. Just don’t be taken in by his charisma. His hastiness could lead to him losing his grip on at least a third of his assets by the end of the year if he continues as is. The only reason he’s being granted this opportunity at all is because he owe-”  
  
“I’m going to stop you right there, _Father,”_ Maki cut in, bringing to fore all of her vocal training to command the room. Her voice came out flat, but with enough volume that even he winced.  
  
“... I beg your pardon?”  
  
“This?” Maki began, shaking the envelope, “Is _entirely_ unacceptable. I am seventeen years old and addressing the academic repercussions of last year. I do not have _time_ to humor these men with miais that I can _guarantee_ will be fruitless.”  
  
“Now Maki,” he began patronizingly, “You can’t know until yo-”  
  
Loud again, “I will _not_ spend my limited time _entertaining_ the egos of these men,” and back to normal volume, “In case you’d forgotten, I am in the _very_ early stages of training for my doctorate. There has not been a Nishikino woman that has not also been a doctor in _generations_ , as you so liked to remind me.”  
  
“Maki…” he growled, warning in his tone.  
  
“I will _not_ be the first to break that tradition just to satisfy _your_ business aspirations,” Maki raised, growling in return and stepping into his space, “Just as grandmother made _you_ wait until _Mother_ established herself, so _they_ will wait until _I_ do.”  
  
Eyes wide and incensed, with flared nostrils he roared in reply, “ _Are you insinuating that I am using the family name for personal gain!?”_  
  
“No! Just _your daughter!_ ” Maki boomed, making the man wince once more, “I _will_ attend these idiotic wastes of time, because I won’t let _them_ know of this mistake, but these are _the last._ **_Do you understand me?_** ”  
  
“I will _not_ be spoken this way to, _Maki,_ ” he spat, trembling and red-faced, “You will show your father respect!”  
  
With a near silent sternness, Maki moved in even closer, nose to nose, “It’s that _respect_ that has me behaving as _civil_ as I am, _Father._ If you don’t _realize_ how many lines you’ve crossed already, then you may not be as deserving as _you think._ ”  
  
“I knew allowing you to waste your time with those girls was a mistake,” he groused dismissively, turning to walk away.  
  
“You’re lucky they were there to talk me down, or we would be having a _very_ different conversation right now. Will either of you be attending this one tomorrow or will you be running away again?”  
  
“Maki, please,” her mother asked, wearily joining the conversation.  
  
“We were on call. You know this,” he replied, shrugging off his vest and starting in on his shirt’s buttons.  
  
“Then _schedule_ _around them_. If you’re going to use antiquated practices, at least follow the tradition enough to show you respect them. How do you think it looked that you were so _disinterested_ in the outcome that you _dropped me off and left?”_ _  
__  
_ “He… he thought we were disinterested?”  
  
“He didn’t mention much at all,” Maki shrugged, “He barely had the cognitive capacity to read off the handout.”  
  
Maki circled her father, riding the moment and still fueled by adrenaline as she entered his field of view once more. She slapped the folder into her palm and continued, “Clearly another case of simply _inheriting_ a position over _earning_ it… which is _why_ it’s so important that you let me finish the process of growing into my position instead of handing off the family name and business to the highest bidder. The power in whatever relationship I involve myself with _must_ remain on the side of our name.”  
  
His expression was unreadable, but he was at least silent for a moment. He turned to her mother and asked, “Did you have any role in this?”  
  
“I’m as surprised as you are,” she shrugged, “Have you been speaking to grandmother?”  
  
“I _do_ have a mind of my own, you know,” Maki growled, dropping the folder on the kitchen counter, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have homework to address. Do us all a favor and stop wasting my time with pedophilac older men. I love you and I _hate_ having to talk to you this way.”  
  
Her father looked stricken and her mother ill as she finished with, “I’d like to get back to calling you Mama and Papa by the end of the week, okay? Goodnight.”  
  
She turned and walked away, grateful that neither called after her. The rush and heat of the encounter was quickly wearing off and she was sure she’d be shaking soon enough. If it weren’t for the glasses, she was certain they would have noticed how much her eyes had teared up. That was probably the most intense usage of acting she’d ever managed…  
  
Now then… back to actual homework assignments and then another email in a few hours after she’d thoroughly cooled off.

 

**_10:53 PM_ **

 

 **From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** Long. Day.

 

 _You’d be proud. I seriously told Papa off. I got loud, I used facts, and I think he gave in. Umi’s advice worked perfectly._ _  
_ _  
_ _Even though you’re still all distant and unaware and crap, I still couldn’t have done it without you. I had a Nico bunny before, and everytime I started yelling, I could taste it on my breath._ _  
_ _  
_ _… I’d rather be tasting you._

 _  
_ _\-----------_ _  
_ _  
_ Maki stared at the line, lips pursed. Too honest? To leave it or not… and with a shrug decided to roll with it. It’s not like Nico was actually going to be seeing it.  
  
_\-----------_

  
_Apparently watching old videos of our BiBi PVs is a turn on now? It feels kind of messed up to be watching with those kinds of thoughts in mind, but some of those moves with you and Eli always… did things for me. Now that I’ve had a year to figure things out, a lot of Kotori’s comments make a lot more sense._

 _I think I’ll call your bluff. I’m going to go “make use” of that stocking selfie you sent last week. Not that I need a picture. I remember every inch of your stupid beautiful self. There’s not much there to recall, afterall._ _  
_ _  
_ _I wonder if you’ve ever “used” any of my pictures like that... you certainly flirt hard enough to make me think you might._ _  
_ _  
_ _… I walked in on Rin “using” Kayo-chin’s leg in the clubroom. Awkward. Rin’s been totally weird ever since. I’m going to have to confront her about it so she can chill out. I’m happy for them, and honestly if it wouldn’t have happened the way it did, it would have been kind of hot._ _  
_ _  
_ _Maybe I should think about that and make you jealous <3 _ _  
_ _  
_ _… I just made myself sad. Going to bed._ _  
_ _Come back soon, dumbass._

  


**February 22nd**

 

 **_3:28 PM_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** Maki would have roughly two hours after getting home to prepare for miai number two. That schedule included some alone time with the music room and an allowance for an intended meet up with Rin and Kayo-chin in the club room. The piano took a particularly vicious beating as she “warmed up” with a blisteringly complex and particularly violent cover of Zurui yo Magnetic Today.

No singing, just rolling keys, popping shoulder muscles, burning biceps, aching fingers, and an intense growling redhead.  
  
It… had been a day.  
  
She rolled immediately from the cover to a simpler work in progress, vastly darker in tone. Kayo-chin still had trouble meeting her gaze… and Maki was having trouble keeping her eyes off of her. Of course Rin noticed and of course this only increased the tension between them… because at some point along the way Maki’d forgotten how to yield ground on the staring front.  
  
She just kept imagining their faces twisted in the heat of that single moment… and it felt _terrible_ .  
  
This would be an ideal time to find some time alone with Eli and ask in an appropriately beleaguered voice how to turn off her libido, because that’s the only excuse Maki had come up with for how the older girl managed herself around Nozomi all the time. She could only assume it was her psyche’s attempt to distract her from all the recent stress.

Maybe she was just defective. You don’t just… daydream about your best friends doing things like that… and you _especially_ don’t try to _get off_ to that sort of thing… and you **_absolutely_ ** don’t do either of those while you’re neck deep in a perpetual depression spiral because the person you’ve realized you’re in love with is now entirely unavailable **_and_ ** your parents are throwing you at older men as a marriage offering.  
  
Yeah, it’s probably just a stress thing. She certainly had reasons to feel stressed.  
  
It’s not like she felt inclined to join in either! Did that make her a voyeur?

Tch. When had her life become so… perverted?  
  
Four restarts in, because her mind was clearly caught up in other thoughts, Maki called it early. She’d go wait in the clubroom for RinPana to show and get an early start home. Just as well, kimono were a pain to put on, so it would be best to take her time with it.  
  
Maki apologized to the piano for inflicting her emotions on it, stopped by the restroom to check herself in the mirror to make sure she didn’t look as murderous as she felt, and plodded to the clubroom, stopping briefly to fish out her key since it looked like she beat them there, and stepped on in.  
  
“Oh come on!”  
  
Inwardly, Maki made the sound decision to start knocking before opening the door. The sight before her was far more illicitly provocative than the last, and her reaction to slam the door shut had come _after_ she was already on the inside.  
  
As the door latched, something… shorted out. The lights dimmed with no visible consequence. The floor dropped out while her body remained rooted. She blinked for an eternity without losing visual input.

The moment stopped being real.  
  
“What are you doing!?” Rin protested, face flushed with an understandable mix of shame, frustration, and likely previous exertions.  
  
“Sorry,” Maki heard herself reply as she offered a shrug, suddenly far too deep in a sluggish haze to feel the shame and embarrassment of last time, “I thought we were supposed to be meeting up here.”  
  
“In like, fifteen minutes!” Rin shot back as Hanayo buttoned her blouse in a frenzy, then after a beat, “Why did you come in!?”  
  
There was definite conflict rolling in Maki’s heart, but it felt distant. Like, she could acknowledge that there was sympathy for Hanayo’s frenzied state and an disappointment for having caused something as intimate as this to be ruined. Unfortunately, that was all background noise. She knew distantly that she should leave, but...

“Only fifteen minutes? You two should take more time than that… don’t let me stop you,” Maki deadpanned, “I don’t mind. It must be pretty nice for how often this seems to happen.”  
  
Hanayo’s blush deepened dramatically. She squeaked and gawked openly as Rin, who had yet to make any effort to cover herself, visibly took a step back, “Wait… you… what!?”  
  
“I said it’s _fine,_ ” Maki assured unconvincingly, taking a seat and resting her cheek heavily into her palm, “The door’s locked, so don’t worry about any of the kids getting in.”  
  
“ _You’re in here!”_ Rin protested, gesturing to her incredulously.  
  
“So I am,” Maki droned with a bored expression, idly appreciating the similarities between Rin’s build to Nico’s, “This is really nice, you know. You two being together.”  
  
Hanayo stopped fumbling with her blouse and looked at Maki. Really looked at her. It was nice that she’d finally done that. “Kayo-chin always did have such pretty eyes,” Maki commented aloud, “Both of you, really.”  
  
Rin suddenly seemed to notice her exposure, holding her blouse closed and scrambling to find her skirt. Hanayo, still only half buttoned, hiked her unders back up and asked, “Are… you okay?”  
  
Rin replied, “Could be better!” as Maki nodded slowly without breaking eye contact.  
  
Hanayo crossed the room, sliding out the chair beside Maki and taking a seat on it’s edge, “You’re… acting a little strange.”  
  
“That’s fair isn’t it?” Maki replied, “I mean, it’s the second time I’ve interrupted the two of you. Sorry about that.”  
  
Hanayo leaned forward, holding up a finger and moving it in a lazy figure eight pattern and watching with growing concern as she tracked Maki’s gaze following it. It was kind of sweet really, Kayo-chin worrying about her like that. Especially since she kept getting in the way.  
  
“Maki-chan?”  
  
“Yeah?” Maki replied lazily, her gaze dropping from the suddenly dizzying pattern to rest a short distance beneath Hanayo’s chin. Hehehe, Kayo’s chin. A smile slowly worked through her tired expression.  
  
“Rin-chan, come over here.”  
  
“Kayo-chin! Your skirt!” Rin groaned, still frantically reassembling her outfit.  
  
“Rin-chan!”  
  
Maki blinked at Hanayo’s tone, bringing her gaze back up from her chest, “Eh? What’s wrong?”  
  
“You! You’re acting really weird and I’m worried.”  
  
Maki tried to come up with a response, but as Rin approached all she could think to do was shrug and say, “Sorry?”  
  
That would have been fine and still within the realms of normalcy, but then Rin added, “If you were sorry, you wouldn’t have come in and stared!” and head-chopped Maki.  
  
The flinch was minimal and outside of narrowed eyes and a weak “Hey,” there was a complete lack of reaction.  
  
The two other second years stared as Maki stared back, blinked, and then looked confused, asking, “What did I come here for again?”  


 

**_11:46 PM_ **

 

 **From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** Dick

 

_So, I know you like it… or at least the idea of it. Like everything else in your personal life, you never came out and said one way or another. If I’m getting fully cut out of your life just for flirting, I somehow doubt you’ve had time to “ride” anyone in a ferris wheel._

_Fuck you for that imagery, by the way. Apparently emotional breakdowns make it easier to talk about this… sexuality... stuff._ _  
_ _  
_ _Anyways, I just spent the evening with someone I’m pretty sure thinks solely with his. Dick, that is. Confident, conventionally handsome, charismatic… so to me he was a cocky, awkward looking, manipulative asshole that’s just after what I assume what everyone else attending these stupid things will be. Access to the family name and access to my body. This jerk didn’t know about µ's either._ _  
_ _  
_ _How can someone know who I am without knowing about µ's?_

_Ugh._

_It was hard to remain civil, but the look on Papa’s face the entire time was worth it. He looked_ **so** _ashamed of what he was making me sit through. Very satisfying. You picked exactly the right filling for me in these things. Dark and bitter. I can’t imagine how much of a nightmare I’d be by now if it wasn’t for you and the girls._ _  
_ _  
_ _Oh, things with Rin got even more awkward. I went to talk to her her and Kayo-chin about what happened and sure enough I walked in on them_ **again** _. I get it. If I had daily access to you, I’d probably be doing everything I could to get you alone all the time._ _  
_ _  
_ _So yeah, Rin’s mad, Kayo-chin is beyond mortified, and I’m horny as fuck with no Nico to shove against a wall and “work things out on,” which is a very uncomfortable and new level of personal admission for me. I shouldn’t be thinking about that kind of action at all with how pissed off and sad I am all the time. Depression is supposed to lower your libido, not switch me from a piano lesbian to a distracted and sexually frustrated lesbian._ _  
_ _  
_ _On the plus, Honoka and Umi are finally getting serious about the student council succession. Fumie is thrilled. Oda came up with a legitimately good score for the group’s next routine, despite them having not placed at all._ _  
_ _  
_ _Yeah, the girls didn’t make it anywhere near the Love Live! Still, they’re all so fired up and excited to get back to working for next year that I’ve got high hopes for them. It’s nostalgic to watch, but excitingly new. They’ve made a point of not following µ's formula, which I really appreciate. Fortunately, we didn’t have any third years in the club, so no one ended up feeling like they lost their chance._

 _A few nights ago I tried calling Eli. I got her voicemail but didn’t leave a message. Nozomi’s number seems to be disabled. I really wish I could talk to them too. All of my former third year girls are gone now._ _  
_ _  
_ _Oh, you’d be happy to hear you were right about Honoka, Umi, and Kotori. Yeah, they’re all three an official thing now. Honoka and Umi publicly. Apparently it’s been like that for a while. Everyone really has paired off._

_Except us._

_Congratulations, by the way, on going international. Korea and Taiwan in one month? You’ll be back in America before you know it. You’ll be starring across Europe and soon the whole world will know your name. God, you’re going to be impossible to deal with from all that ego. It’ll take me_ **hours** _to put you in your place when you finally come back around.  
_ _  
_ _Hey, was I being respectful of your dreams back when you were around… or was I just being a coward, afraid of you saying no._ _  
_ _  
_ _I see Rin and Kayo-chin losing themselves in each other and… I really want that with you. Those moments are just so beautiful. Is it weird to think that of your friends? I mean… I love them both. I love them a lot… so… is it strange that I would have been fine with watching? It definitely feels like that should be strange… but they just looked so…_

_I really want to see you like that._

_I miss you._

_Jackass._

_  
  
_

 

**February 23rd**

 

**_7:25 AM_ **

 

 **FullSpeedNyahead:** Can you come to the clubroom?

 **FullSpeedNyahead:** Kayo-chin and I need to talk to you.

  


**February 24th**

 

**_1:35 AM_ **

 

 **From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** Yikes

 

_Apparently Rin wanted to kick me out of the club. They could have just had me return the keys so she and Kayo-chin can have the room secure to do you know what. Thankfully, Kayo-chin vetoed it, but that was the most awkward fifteen minutes I’ve ever had with them._

_Hurtful too. I did hand over the keys and stepped down as VP, even though Kayo-chin insisted it wasn’t necessary. After how awkward it was the last time I walked in on them, I kind of expected this... but it was in that self-deprecating way that you don’t expect reality to actually follow through with. Like, a worst case scenario._

_She could have even sent like… warnings to not come around the clubroom at certain times. I’d even cover for them! I love them too… so… having her want to take such an extreme measure? I’ve spent too much time crying this month. I think I’m going to have to get my poor Nico neso cleaned._

_I’ve considered having Fumie take the President role and I’d take on the VP responsibilities. If I’m being honest, I don’t want anything to do with any of it, but there’s so much pressure and assumption that I’m not sure how to walk away. Apparently I value the opinions of the student body more than parental expectation?_

_On that topic, I’ll be giving candidate #1 the boot tonight. It’ll be awkward, but at least it’ll be over with. The first meeting with #3 is coming up tomorrow. When did they expect me to get my homework finished if this was going to be a daily thing? For that matter, why the hell is Papa in such a hurry to toss me at some random guy to get knocked up? That was seriously the intent of #2. The guy wanted to get started on ‘cementing’ things asap._

_Gross. Keep your glue to yourself._

_I’ve made new unrelated accounts so I can follow you on my own since I don’t want to bother Kayo-chin anymore. They all use the waiwaiyazawa4382 handle. I kind of hope you spot the comments and connect the dots from the 4382, but I kinda doubt it’ll happen. Too busy to feel lonely?_ _  
_ _  
_ _Cocoro reached out again. She wants to hang out tomorrow. Obviously I said yes, but I have no idea how well I’m going to handle it. I felt shaken for an hour after she sent her message. I don’t think she knows and I’m debating on whether I should talk to your Mom about this._

_Does your Mom know what happened that made me get blcoked? Does she know how I feel?_

_Does she know how_ **you** _feel? I would never risk your communication with your family, but… this is going to be really hard. I’ve gone for so many weeks this past year without being in touch with you, but I’ve felt every minute of the separation this time. Knowing that I can’t just… reach out and call you a moron is awful._ _  
_ _  
_ _Please tell me someone is calling out your stupidity out there? Someone has to let you know. While they’re at it, they need to tell you to call me._

 _It’s stupid and it’s dramatic, but I think I’m losing it. Kayo-chin told me that I’ve been acting really weird lately. Wouldn’t it be stranger if I_ **_wasn’t_ ** _acting different! Still, I think she might be right. I’ve been having trouble sleeping, I’m never hungry, and sometimes I kind realize I have no idea what I’d spent the last hour doing._

 _Why did I have to walk in on Rin and Kayo-chin? I’ve lost Eli. I’ve lost Nozomi. Honoka, Umi, and Kotori are probably going to disappear after graduation exactly like they did. I’ve lost_ **you.**

 _I can’t lose them too._ _  
_ _  
  
_

 

**February 25th**

 

**_3:35 AM_ **

 

 **From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** Pancakes

 

 _Do you think it’d be bad to take Cocoro for pancakes two times in a row? They were_ **so** _fluffy and she really seemed to like them. It’ll just be the two of us this time. Rin and I kind of got into it again today and she’s not talking to me anymore._

_That’s fair. I hear I was kind of awful. Apparently it happened during one of those blank spots I can’t remember._

_So… anyway, yeah, I was thinking pancakes and then later this really cute dessert buffet in Harajuku. You know the one? We went there. You had this itch to go looking for a tamagotchi of all things, and it had to be pink and bunny themed,  and then we just kind of stumbled on it._

_I think she’ll like it. Not sure what all else we’ll do, but I know we’ll be hanging out around the house a bit until your Mom gets home to keep an eye on Cocoa and Cotaro._

_#3 bit the dust today an hour after I turned down #1. I didn’t even have to handle that one. Papa stepped in when he tried to use money to “accelerate” the process. Isn’t that funny? At least I can rest assured I don’t have a price tag attached yet. Poor Papa was so uncomfortable that I’ve mostly forgiven him. I know this whole process is hard on him too, so I made sure to let him know I’m glad he’s handling this the way he is now. I really feel like he’s learned._

_I… kind of want to pass a message to you through your Mom. They wouldn’t block her, would they? I won’t risk it, but I really, really, really need to talk to you. I have so much I want to tell you… maybe if I just told her to have you check this address?_

_I know I can’t be that selfish, but I really… really want to. It’d even be worth you actually reading this garbage._

_I saw the crowds outside of your interview at the NHK. Would you believe I almost whipped up a banner to join them? That would have been good. “Former Co-star Shows Support for National Treasure, Yazawa Nico.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _I see you all over the place. I hear your voice all the time. I have four pieces of the chocolate that you made just for me remaining. I have pictures and videos and an old workout outfit that you always promised you’d come back for. I remember your secret thoughts and preferences, dreams and vices that you said you’ve never told anyone else._

_I have all of you… except for you._

_I won’t tell her anything. Don’t worry. I’m not going to worry Cocoro with any of my personal emotional baggage. I have a lot more time now that I don’t have club responsibilities anymore, so… I can use that time to help her with any of_ **her** _troubles. Be the big sister for a change._

 _I’ll be heading out in like four hours. I should probably try to get some sleep._ _  
_ _  
_ _I know it’s stupid, but I really thought you would have gotten in touch by now._

_  
  
_

 

**February 26th**

 

**_12:41 AM_ **

 

 **From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** Family

 

_Everyone’s doing good at Casa de Yazawa. I kept it together great. It sounds like you’ve been in touch with them. When Cocoro said you asked if they’ve heard from me, my heart seriously did some backflips. You noticed and you asked about me… but that means you probably assume I just stopped messaging you._

_Why haven’t you messaged me back then? Haven’t you looked at your phone? Noticed that I’m on your blocked list!? Don’t just wait for me, toss me a lifeline here!_

_We had a good time. After that I was in pretty high spirits. I took her all over and she talked a lot about a new friend she’s made that might become something more. I’m sure she’s talked about it with you by now. I hadn’t been that happy since the_ **last** _time the two of us hung out._

_I’m writing this on my phone, sitting on the last train home. After the girls and Cotaro went to bed, I stayed and talked to your Mom for a while. You know how proud she is, so I’m not going to go into that, but she is also worried about the pace they have you moving at. I am too, but I know how capable you are at acknowledging when you’re tired. Lazy sack. <3 _

_I really love your family._

_They’re always so happy to see me, too._

_Just in general! They’re always happy! I don’t get it! I can’t imagine how they always run so positive. It’s the same with you. I know how often you worry about the future or how much doubt you carried throughout everything. The fact that you carried on so strongly regardless is part of why I’ve always found you so amazing. It’s something I love about you_ **so** _much because I know how much strength that takes._

_It’s inspiring._

_Papa… hasn’t talked to me directly since I yelled at him. He barely even looks at me. Mama’s apologetic, but… that’s not what I want from either of them. Kind of what I expected. After last year they don’t recognize me anymore. Proud, but unable to connect._

_I sent Kayo-chin a message on Line, but haven’t gotten a response yet. Rin either, but I know she’s just acting out because she’s mad. I believe it’ll pass. After what they said I said to her, honestly I deserve it. Apparently out-of-it Maki don’t have current Maki’s handle on reactionary verbal retorts._

_I really needed today. Your family’s warmth and energy just… it really helped. Even though everything else is kind of falling apart, at least I have them._

_I told your Mother._

_I told her what happened. I know I said I wouldn’t, but she just… looked at me. Asked the right questions. I’m pretty sure she already knew and was just trying to lead me into admitting it._

_It was after the kids went to bed and it’s fair to say that she now has a pretty good idea of how I feel about you. How deeply too. I think I caught her off guard, but she seemed alright with it… particularly after I literally begged her not to make anything harder on you by telling you._

_I say that, but I did give in enough to ask her to… maybe… mention to you over the phone, vocally, that I_ **might** _be sending you mail to this address… in which case I may have just lied to her because I’ve kinda let it all hang out here. I’m sorry if she did, but… I just miss you so much._

 _I don’t even care if you think I’m pathetic when you read this anymore. Any shame would be worth it at this point. I know, not like me, but almost every day this week I keep finding more ways to lose the support I’ve been counting on. I’m so pissed at last year’s me for not_ **trying** .  
  
...  
  
_I think I’m subconsciously sabotaging myself or something. Honoka and Umi have been trying to be more social with me than usual, but I keep pushing them off to the point of avoiding them. It’s so comforting to have them around.. but at the same time I usually end up feeling antsy. Frustrated. They pay all this attention to me and it’s… like… too much?_

 _I know you’d say I was being stupid for feeling so lonely and pushing people away for trying to be there for me. I feel stupid for doing it! It’s like I just know I’m going to end up saying the perfectly wrong thing and then Umi will realize how completely unlike her I am, or I’ll hurt Honoka’s feelings with some stupid from-the-hip retort and never forgive myself._ _  
_ _  
_ _Isn’t it a better idea to just keep away when everything you do seems to set everything on fire?_ _  
_ _  
_ _Yeah, this got dark quick. Sorry. Really, today was a good day! I mean, your Mom all but gave her blessing for me to ask you out~ <3 That’s pretty cool, right? Does she tease you about me? She definitely teased me when she found out. _

_Call me back or something already, you butt._

  


**_2:33 AM_ **

 

 **From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** Family… again

 

 _Papa relieved Waki of her duties._ _  
_ _  
_ _I got home and there was no one here, which is pretty normal… but Waki left a note wishing me the best. She apologized for not getting to tell me herself, but apparently that’s part of the deal. She said that Papa thought she was “too involved in my personal life to continue providing services appropriately.”_

 _I don’t think the others could ever get what this means to me. None of the others even met Waki. Her phone was part of the contract. Apparently it was separate from her personal line… so… I have no way to contact her._ _  
_ _  
_ _I had so much I wanted to say in this but… just seeing this written out has me exhausted all over again._ _  
_ _  
_ _This... has been a pretty bad week._ _  
_ _  
_ _If I showed up at your fan meet in Korea, do you think I could just hide in your luggage for a year or two? Disappearing is sounding more and more appealing by the minute._

  


**10:30 AM**

 

  
“Nishikino-san… are you… are you sure?”  
  
Fumie looked around the classroom wildly, probably to verify that she wasn’t the only one hearing this.  
  
“You’re way more competent at this than I am,” Maki replied dully, “… and new family responsibilities will likely pull me from the tasks that would require your level of attention. Of course I’ll offer support as best I could, but you genuinely deserve the position.”  
  
“I… I’ll think about it,” the girl responded, wide-eyed.  
  
“We’ll have to finalize that decision soon and let Honoka and Umi know.”  
  
“R-right,” she replied to Maki’s back as she returned to her seat. The other girls who met her eyes could only shrug in confusion.

 

**12:15 PM**

 

  
“That is… If that’s really how you feel about this… ,” Honoka checked for the fourth time.  
  
“It is,” Maki confirmed distantly from her spot by the window, “Really, it’s in the school’s best interests.”  
  
Wordlessly, Umi set to re-filling out the paperwork to reflect the shift in positions as Honoka offered a _very_ uncertain looking Fumie a smile, “Well then, congratulations on your promotion!”  
  
“Thanks…” Fumie replied, having trouble taking her eyes off of the disengaged redhead.  
  
“If you wouldn’t mind, may we have a moment to speak with Maki alone?” Umi asked.  
  
Looking relieved, Fumie nodded and replied, “Of course. Thank you for your hard work.”  
  
Silence persisted for over a minute after the door closed behind Fumie.  
  
“Maki?” Umi said, breaking the silence and laying a hand on the younger girl’s shoulder.  
  
“I don’t know who else I could ask to take the VP spot,” Maki replied without replying, still watching the yard outside.  
  
“Maki-chan… ,” Honoka added, “What’s going on with you?”  
  
“You two are going to head out to France for a bit after graduating, aren’t you? To see Kotori?”  
  
“Huh?” Honoka blinked.  
  
“We are, for a little, but… I’m not sure where you heard that. It would be a month at the most,” Umi answered carefully.  
  
Maki turned, smiling, “That’s good. I’m sure she misses you out there. Thanks for helping bring Fumie on board with this. She’s going to do a great job.”  
  
“Maki-chan…,” Honoka tried again.  
  
“I’m going to go get some lunch,” Maki replied turning away, “I missed breakfast this morning and it’s going to be a pretty busy night. Gotta shut down #2 tonight and then I can be done with these stupid things.”

“Would you like some company?” Umi offered.

For the first time since entering, Maki hesitated. She turned.

“... Yes, please.”

 

 

**February 27th**

 

**_3:45 AM_ **

 

 **From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** What am I doing?

 

_I told Mama I’d be spending the night at Honoka’s after that last miai, which actually got fairly ugly at the end. I thought the entire point of a miai was to keep things civil and sterile for the process._

_I’m not sure why I did that. I didn’t ask, and I’m certainly not there now._

_I’m sending this from the school, actually. It’s surprisingly easy to break into once you know where the security features are and how they work. I’m on the roof and the sky is just as cloudy as the last time I saw you._

_I got the position swapped over to Fumie. I thought I’d feel more relieved._

_Honoka and Umi are going to go to France after they graduate. I’m happy for them, but… kind of scared/certain they’re going to just up and disappear like Eli and Nozomi. Do you know where they are yet?_

_I imagine you’re asleep in Korea right now. I hope you are or the rest of the day is going to be pretty rough. I also hope they’ve upped your caloric intake, or you’re going to be pretty unhappy with how much rib you’re going to start showing._

_So, like… I said I was scared earlier. I kind of lied._

_I haven’t really felt much of anything since I saw the letter from Waki. I think it’s some kind of emotional shock or something. I’m not sure if I like it or not. It’s definitely easier. I ate an extra chocolate after I read it while I was still feeling lonely, so I’ve only got one piece left._

_It’s a strawberry one._

_I wonder if the girls will still ask me for help with their compositions. I haven’t touched anything music related in a couple of days. I just realized that._

_You think Papa will talk to me again now that all the guys he brought in turned out to be terrible?_

_Umi and Honoka keep trying. I’m glad, because I think I’m starting to get a little self destructive. I’m not hurting myself or anything… but it’s hard to focus on homework with everything that’s going on._

_Focusing in general is hard._

_I wonder how quickly I’d get blocked if I tried to get a new number and called you from that._

_Good luck over there. I just got really sleepy. I might be able to catch an hour or two before the sun comes up. I’m laying right next to where we were sitting when you first told me how you really felt about Nozomi’s washi-washi thing._

_I’m really glad you knew that’s not how she meant it… and that you knew I was serious when I admitted that I thought you were beautiful. That was really hard for me… and afterwards you really changed how you acted around me._

_This roof is a very important place for me. I’m glad we saved the school just so it can continue to exist._

_I’ll save the chocolate for Wednesday. It’ll be half of the month then since I last saw you in person._

  


**_6:45 AM_ **

 

Maki snuck into the classroom shortly after she saw the first couple of staff open the gate. Two 45-minute naps had done far more to supply rest than they had any right to. Having access to the solitude and an hour of uninterrupted time gave her ample space to wrap up homework for her third class.

It was a pretty big surprise then, when Hanayo entered the room well before her usual arrival time. Even bigger when Rin followed her, particularly given that neither were even in her class this year, the duo being shuffled off into another room where the formerly quiet girl now served as class representative.

“You’re here early,” Maki replied flatly as they walked to her desk.  
  
“What’s the address you’re messaging Nico-chan through?” Hanayo asked, her voice tight.

A chill ran up Maki’s spine. Her eyes widened as her voice answered before she had fully processed the question, “Kick smile girl 95. One word, the number is numerals. It’s a gmail account. Did she ask? Has she contacted you?”

“Give me a minute,” Hanayo hushed as she scrambled to type into her phone. Rin’s eyes were wide when Maki’s gaze flashed her way. She was closer than Kayo-chin, so without thinking she reached out and grabbed her hand. In response, Rin shuffled closer and leaned in.  
  
“Come with us.”

 

**_6:53 AM_ **

 

In the time it took for the three to make it to the club room, Hanayo’s account was blocked. The idol club’s president was currently standing behind a seated Maki and hugging her from behind as she read and re-read the exchange. Rin had also latched on, kneeling at the chair’s side and wrapping her arms around Maki’s waist while resting her head on her lap.  
  
Maki idly played with Rin’s hair as she went over the brief conversation one more time.  
  
**_Nico2Nii.4Ever (06:10AM):_ ** Pana-Banana, I need a favor and I need it quick.

 **_Nico2Nii.4Ever (06:10AM):_ ** Mama told me that Maki-chan’s been trying to get in touch with me through email and hasn’t been able to, but she forgot the address.

 **_Nico2Nii.4Ever (06:10AM):_ ** You know I love you, but I’m going stir crazy without my best girl, you know what I’m sayin’?

 **_Nico2Nii.4Ever (06:11AM):_ ** There’s been issues with my contract that I’m trying to get fixed, but it’d be pretty nice to try and sneak around this bullshit in the meantime.

 **_Nico2Nii.4Ever (06:11AM):_ ** So… please, hook me up? This is seriously a hit to my motivation. I miss my Maki-chan!

 **_Origami.0nigirig0ddess (06:15AM):_ ** Ohmygosh! Nico-chan!!! I’ll have to ask but YES. Yes! She’s been trying to get ahold of you!

 **_Origami.0nigirig0ddess (06:15AM):_ ** It’s been awful! She’s not talking to any of us! I think some really terrible things have happened lately and I’ve never seen her like this before.

 **_Origami.0nigirig0ddess (06:15AM):_ ** I’m on my way out the door, I’ll let you know as soon as I track her down!

 **_Nico2Nii.4Ever (06:15AM):_ ** TT^TT  Thank you!! Just don’t message again until you have the address. I don’t want my manager seeing the phone light up. I’ll explain when I can.

 **_Origami.0nigirig0ddess (06:45AM):_ ** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail

 **_Origami.0nigirig0ddess (06:47AM):_ ** Nico-chan?

 

Hanayo’s account continued to be able to see Nico’s Line homepage until 6:49, so plenty of time for the message to have either been relayed or intercepted one way or another. Without a word, Maki handed Hanayo her phone back and pulled her own up.

 

\------------

 **From:** Nishikino.Maki4382@gmail.com  
**To:** Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com  
  
**Subject:** Test

 

_Hey, call me you ass._

\------------

 

She immediately received the response:

 

\------------

 **Subject** : Delivery Failure (Blocked)

 

Delivery to the following recipient failed:

 Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com

 

The recipient has chosen not to receive email from you.

\------------

 

“Is that even legal?” Rin boggled, tightening her grasp around Maki’s waist and making it wonderfully difficult to breathe.

“It depends on what she agreed to in her contract,” Hanayo replied, her magnificently warm and soft hands brushing her hair back from her face as she all but cradled her back into her chest.  
  
“She knows. That’s all that matters,” Maki added in a low soft voice, “None of this would be happening if she had any say in it. She knows where to go to see what I’ve written.”  
  
“But your account is blocked! Wouldn’t they go through and remove the messages from you too?” Rin protested, letting go and sitting on the edge of the table.

“Even if they straight up deleted the account, Nico-chan knows my passwords. She could go in and read through my sent folder,” Maki explained with a shrug, “If she can find the time.”  
  
This kind of physical bliss was difficult to move away from, but Maki stood and turned to Hanayo, “Kayo-chin… thank you so much for this. I’m sorry that you got blocked too…”  
  
“It’s alright,” she assured with a wave, “This is Nico-chan we’re talking about. If she wants to talk to us, she’ll find a way around… what are you…?”  
  
Hanayo was interrupted by Maki resting a hand at her side and the other cradling her cheek as she leaned in.  
  
“UHHH…” Rin began to protest loudly until she saw that Maki had gone for the cheek. She stopped, but continued to squirm as the odd gesture went on far longer than expected. She then froze in place as Maki turned did the same to her.  
  
Hanayo shrugged as Rin met her eyes in panicked confusion. Maki shifted from a cheek kiss to burying her face into Rin’s shoulder. From here, she breathed, “Don’t shut me out, alright? You girls are all I’ve got left. Just… I don’t know… text me if you’re going to go at it in here or something. Seriously. I’m happy for you. Hell, if you need a place to go to be alone together, come to my place. No one’s ever there.”  
  
Rin squirmed uncomfortably, “Maki-chan…”

“I’m serious. Please.”  
  
Hanayo came in from behind, much like Honoka the week before, and reminded, “Maki-chan, Of course we’re not going to abandon you.”  
  
“It’s true,” Rin added with a laugh, “You just kind of weirded me out a little, nya? I never expected Maki-chan to be so perverted!”

“To be fair, you’re both really pretty, so shut up,” Maki groused with a smile.

“Oh hoh, nya~! Is this the kind of sweet talk you give to Nico-chan?” Rin teased.

The smile faded, and in a small voice, Maki replied, “No… but it’s the kind of thing she would say it to me. This? This is what I figured would happen if I ever said anything back.”  
  
Rin’s expression sobered and she replied with a hug.  


**_8:45 PM_ **

  
  
\------------

 **Subject** : Delivery Failure (Blocked)

 

Delivery to the following recipient failed:

 Kicksmilegirl95@gmail.com

 

The recipient has chosen not to receive email from you.

\------------  
  
  
Maki, sprawled on the couch at home, stared at her phone’s screen. Her new nightly outlet was lost. The void was one thing, but she couldn’t fool herself into being satisfied writing to a brick wall. Whoever was monitoring Nico’s social media was sharp. Even the waiwaiyazawa accounts had been spotted and ban-hammered to oblivion.  
  
That had actually been the moment Maki needed. Being able to think of this less as horrible isolation and more of an attack on Nico’s freedom changed everything. It didn’t do much for options, but it _did_ pull her out of the perpetual funk she’d spent most of the latter half of February in.  
  
To be fair, a lot more had happened than just… _temporarily_ losing Nico. The horribly mismanaged miais, Eli and Nozomi’s continued absence, the tension between her and Rin, her parents almost completely ceasing communication, the fear of Umi and Honoka riding off into the sunset never to return, and… and now Waki… any one of these would have been more than enough to wreck her.  
  
To be fair, they still were, really… but now she had something to be pissed off about to focus on, which always helped.  
  
As Maki browsed her photos, hundreds of group and pair selfies, clandestine candids, and cheesy Nico poses, she considered that maybe it was a good thing that all of this hit at once. If her coping skills were so subpar that she was dissociating during the more stressful moments, then why drag it all out? Why not just get it all in at the same time and get it out of the way?  
  
The month had been eye opening… and her picture collection was absolute proof of a few of these revelations.  
  
1\. Nico was right and Nishikino Maki was an idiot.  
  
2\. Nico and Rin were right and Nishikino Maki was, on some level, an irredeemable pervert.  
  
3\. Umi and Hanayo were right in that she, in a rather unhealthy way, made the girls of µ's the entire center of her emotional wellbeing.  
  
4\. All of the µ's alumni, Waki-san, Nico’s family, and every NicoMaki fan shipper was right and that she had latched on to Nico romantically far earlier than she realized.  
  
5\. Nishikino Maki was right and that if she continued as she was… she would most certainly crash and burn, heartbroken and alone.  
  
Some of those, Maki was fine with. The one was becoming even more appealing as time went on. Numbers one and five were simply unacceptable. The question was, what should she do to change that this? What _could_ she do?  
  
It might be naive, but with how important last year was and the subconscious, visceral reaction to even the _idea_ of someone courting her that didn’t know about µ's, Maki was certain that she would either be romantically locked with a fellow µ's member or be with no one at all. Recent events made it clear that this didn’t necessarily _have_ to be Nico, but… _obviously_ it could only be Nico.  
  
She had no idea what to do with that for the moment, so she set it aside. Heartbroken and alone didn’t only apply to romance and sexual partners after all.  
  
Rin’s recent behavior, and Kayo-chin’s response in kind, told her that there simply was no member of µ's that had made her as much of a priority emotionally as she had them. It hurt, but it was a truth she just had to swallow. Really, it was probably her own fault for critically failing to demonstrate her affection properly. Regardless, this meant she needed to stop being so focused and possibly reach out to more people.  
  
The obvious choice for potential friendship was Fumie. Half of the reason the girl had even lined up to be VP was to get closer to her. Maki knew this, but was also now accepting that she was apparently too much of a self-centered asshole to reciprocate. This would have to change… probably… if she could just stop being a dumb butt long enough to _try_ communicating like a normal person.  
  
She had some practice with the appropriate levels of honesty recently, thanks to her one-way communique with Nico. Now all she had to do was apply that to her daily life.  
  
Yeah. _That_ would be easy _._ _  
_ _  
_ Maybe not quite that honest, but she could probably swing at least being open to deepening relationships with people who offered so clearly. With that in mind, Maki opened a Line to her previously unused contact to Fumie.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Sorry to message you out of nowhere. I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have pressured you. It was unfair of me to push you into something that is a lot of work that you likely don’t really want.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** We will absolutely go back to Umi tomorrow to have that decision reversed.  
  
The other girl didn’t keep her waiting for long.  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** Nishikino-san? It’s okay! I’m not mad!  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** I don’t know what’s going on, but you seem to be very stressed out lately. It’s understandable that you might not want to take on any additional responsibilities.  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** My offer stands. If you need any help, please feel free to ask!  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** We can discuss the arrangement of positions later.  
  
Maki snorted at the completely inappropriate way she read the statement. She was doomed. Nico and Nozomi had won.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Tomorrow? After class? Do you have a preferred dessert I could treat you to for putting up with my nonsense recently?  
  
It was a familiar feeling, putting herself out there. It actually felt pretty good to get tied up in that anticipation after half a month of depressed anxiety. Maki even found herself smiling as she imagined poor Fumie’s reaction to this sudden 180. The response took a while. According to the number of ...’s popping on and off the screen, she rewrote the coming reply seven times.  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** That would work well for me. I like ice cream, though it obviously wouldn’t be necessary.  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** Would that be alright?  
  
In a moment of shining clarity, Maki finally understood Nico’s nearly smug enjoyment of watching her squirm. She knew exactly where Fumie’s cautious response was coming from. It felt good, but she wouldn’t string the poor girl along like the fiendish Yazawa.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Do you have any time or distance restraints? I have an open evening tomorrow and we could make a thing of it if you like. We’re going to be working together quite a bit in the coming year and I feel I haven’t been the most forthcoming with you.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’d like to remedy that. Also, there’s an excellent ice cream option if we take the train a few stops away. We could bring a change of clothes if you’re worried about your uniform.  
  
Another long wait and over a dozen re-written replies.  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** My schedule is open. I’ll bring a casual outfit.  
  
On some level, the reason Maki had agreed to working with Fumie at all was the bearing and mannerisms that they shared. The other girl had trouble making friends just like she did. She also had a very neutral passive face, which Maki could attest to being a burden in social settings.  
  
That insight made it easy to read the pauses between the replies and the careful wording. Fumie was definitely excited and more than a little bewildered, which would suit perfectly.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Great! We’ll iron out the details in the morning. Have a good night!  
  
Almost immediately, Fumie replied with a, “You as well!”  
  
… and that was that. Tomorrow, the end of the month, would be a first step out of this mire. A new potential something. At the least a distraction and at the most… well... who knows? Not quite exciting, but still worth telling Nico about.  
  
She was half way through the first paragraph of the email before she remembered.

  


**February 28th**

 

**_12:34 PM_ **

 

 **_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** Maki-chan, the girls have been asking about you. Should we expect you back soon?  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** You can have the key back! We miss you, nya! (˃̥̥ω˂̥̥̥)  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … I’ll consider that as long as you warn me the next time you two can’t wait until you get home.

 **_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … and you call _me_ a pervert.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Does Oda have something for me to look at or something?

 **_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** No, they just miss having you around! Yukiho has been having trouble keeping Alisa in line without you being around to impress.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Me? Shouldn’t they be more concerned about impressing you? You _are_ the club president.  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** Everyone wants to impress Maki-chan!  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m already impressed that this chat is even happening. I thought you two would be busy over lunch.  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** Maki-chan, please. It’s embarrassing enough as it is!!  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** Believe it or not, we don’t usually do that!  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** It’s true! It’s only happened at school like… seven times!  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … that number should be 0, Rin.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** There’s not enough privacy to take the amount of time necessary to appropriately appreciate Kayo-chin. Just look at her.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I expect better of you, Rin.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** … and Kayo-chin! I’ve only seen you on the bottom. Please tell me you take an active role once in a while. Rin is just as deserving of attention as you are.  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** … What just happened?  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** It’s hard to sometimes! Rin-chan can be very insistent.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Do you need a leash for your cat or something? We could go shopping this weekend.  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** What is happening!? (´⊙ω⊙`)！  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** That’s not usually to my preferences, but I can certainly see the appeal.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You have to keep her disciplined or else she’ll keep acting out. I imagine you don’t dislike that side of her either, though.  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** I… appreciate my rambunctious Rin-chan.  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** Ah, I’m dreaming. That’s the only way this could be happening, nya.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Are you saying you dream about Kayo-chin and I chastising you?  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Lewd.  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** You must be feeling better. This is wonderful!  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** I think you broke Rin-chan.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m sorry, breaking her in was your job.  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** Rin is unbreakable! Σ(ಠิωಠิ|||)  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Kayo-chin, where are you two right now?  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** The clubroom, as always. There’s not much time left, but would you care to join us?  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Extra lewd. Like I said, there needs to be an appropriate amount of time properly appreciate you, Kayo-chin.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I suppose I could swing by for a little and assure the club that I’m not gone for good.  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** Rin is so confused! ヽ ( ꒪д꒪ )ﾉ  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** Maki-chan got broken!! ヽ ( ꒪д꒪ )ﾉ  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m not the one we’re talking about breaking in here.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** omw  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** and Kayo-chin? Thank you.  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** Thank _you_. I don’t think I’ve laughed this hard in weeks.

  


**_3:20 PM_ **

 

 **_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’m out by the gate whenever you’re ready.  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** So fast! Sorry, still getting changed!  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** No need to hurry. I just never got out of the habit of changing quickly between performances.  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** On my way!  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** That’s an enviable skill.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I can’t tell you how refreshing it is to mention that and _not_ get a reply about getting out of my clothes quickly.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I need more friends that don’t default to the inappropriate.  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** I imagine Sonoda-senpai is always on her best behavior.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Umi is fine… but where there’s Umi, there is also Honoka.  
  
**_Ueno.FuFuFux9:_ ** … I understand completely.

  


**_5:40 PM_ **

 

 **_Kousaka.LoafAnomnom:_ ** Maki-chan!  
  
**_Kousaka.LoafAnomnom:_ ** Wanna come to a surprise sleepover at my place?  
  
**_Kousaka.LoafAnomnom:_ ** Umi-chan’s coming and I’m trying to convince RinPana to come over too!  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** On a school night? Is this a study thing?  
  
**_Kousaka.LoafAnomnom:_ ** This is a movie and manju thing! You’ll come, right?  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’d have to get home first… and I do have a lot of homework to catch up on.  
  
**_Kousaka.LoafAnomnom:_ ** My parents aren’t in~ ♡♡+.ﾟ(￫ε￩*)ﾟ+.ﾟ  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Isn’t that something you should be saying to Umi?  
  
**_Kousaka.LoafAnomnom:_ ** ( ๑‾̀◡‾́)σ» I did!  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Did she play along?

 **_Kousaka.LoafAnomnom:_ ** (●♡∀♡))ヾ☆*。She did!!  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I’ll be over right after I get home.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Should I bring anything?  
  
**_Kousaka.LoafAnomnom:_ ** <3 <3 Only cute Nishikino girls. <3 <3  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I could probably manage that.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Should I try and help convince RinPana?  
  
**_Kousaka.LoafAnomnom:_ ** Truly a worthy successor to the student council. Absolutely!  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I got this.

  


**_6:03 PM_ **

  


**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You guys are coming to Honoka’s, right?  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** Your timing is impressive, Maki-chan.  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** We’ll head over as soon as we wrap up here.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You’re kidding me.  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** Like I said, insistent.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Congratulations.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** So, by wrap up… an hour? Two?  
  
**_FullSpeedNyahead:_ ** What happened to my innocent Maki-chan?!?  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I have a picture in my library I sent to Nico a few weeks ago I was going to send where I was flipping off the camera.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** You don’t get to see it right now though, because I was in bed and it was late and I’m not sending that out to anyone. You’ll have to wait until we’re in person.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Something to look forward to.  
  
**_Origami.0nigirig0ddess:_ ** I want to see Maki-chan’s bed-head!

  


**_8:43 PM_ **

 

 **_RightintheCocor0:_ ** Sorry to bother you so late, but I was wondering if you might be open this weekend?  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** It’s not late at all. Sorry for the slow reply. I’m at Honoka’s and Rin wouldn’t get off my lap.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** It’s a little crazy here right now.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Even if I was busy, I’d make time for you. What did you have in mind?  
  
**_RightintheCocor0:_ ** No real plans. I just was hoping to spend some time with you again.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Sounds good to me. After school on Saturday or Sunday?  
  
**_RightintheCocor0:_ ** Sunday, if it would be alright.  
  
**_RightintheCocor0:_ ** Have you heard from Nico-onee-san?  
  
**_RightintheCocor0:_ ** Mama seems more worried than usual.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** That’s a long story that I’ll save for Sunday.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** I got a message from her indirectly. Don’t worry, she’ll be alright.  
  
**_Yes.ThatNishikinoMaki:_ ** Let me know what time you’d want me to come over and we’ll talk more about it then. I’d like to talk to your Mom about the situation as well.  
  
**_RightintheCocor0:_ ** Will do! Looking forward to it! <3

 

**_10:53 PM_ **

 

 **_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** Maki!!! I finally got my hands on a cellphone charger. You wouldn’t believe how much of a pain it’s been to find an adapter.  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** I saw that you called. I hope I didn’t miss anything important.  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** I have so much to catch up on with you and the others. We’re in Belgium now and, don’t tell anyone, Nozomi and I are getting married!~  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** We’ve been eating our way across Europe and would you believe I actually saw a TV in a store window playing a clip from the parade in New York? It made me miss you all so much!  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** I have no idea what time it is over there, so I’ll keep this short, but text me anytime. I’m so sorry that we haven’t been in touch, but we got kind of carried away.  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** I finally met Nozomi’s parents and… wow. So much to say there.  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** Let me know when a good time to call would be. I’d much rather catch up with you in a way that lets me hear your voice.  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** Nozomi sends her best too. She’s coming out of a food coma.  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** I’ll stop for now, but I just wanted to let you know that everything is wonderful and I can’t wait to talk to you!!!

 

**_11:23 PM_ **

 

 **_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** Hey, what’s up with Nico? She’s not responding to anything, which is really unlike her. Is she on tour right now or something?

 

**_11:50 PM_ **

  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** Maki-chan~ It’s Nozomi  <3  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** Aww, Elichika already told you!?  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** Boo!  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** How are things progressing with you and Nicocchi?  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** I imagine pretty good by now, given how she was talking the last time I got to catch up with her.  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** That was a while ago, so I can’t _wait_ to hear all the juicy details.  <3 You can’t leave anything out. Nicocchi was very descriptive when we talked last and I’m spoiled now!  
  
**_HaraAyase.ElichikaSho:_ ** Sweet dreams, my melodic Maki-chan~ <3<3

 

**_11:55 PM_ **

 

It always surprised her how early the other girls checked out for the night. One after another, they fell asleep amidst a tangle of limbs and snores. Alisa had been a surprise to see, but she probably shouldn’t have been given how close she and Yukiho had become.  
  
To avoid disturbing the others, Maki slipped out and padded carefully to the front door. She was definitely sleepy from all the food, but not quite ready to give in just yet. There was one more thing she wanted to do.  
  
The sky was overcast again. It had been a few weeks since Maki had any quality time with the stars. Tonight would be continuing the trend. The air was far more brisk than she’d hoped, so she wouldn’t be able to stay out for long, but she still spent nearly a minute just watching the fog of her breath dissipate.  
  
This turned out to be a really good day.  
  
Things seemed to be better with Rin and Kayo-chin now. Maybe even better than ever. Maki just hadn’t realized how much she’d come to rely on the random acts of physical affection Rin casually supplied after Nico graduated. Though… even between Rin and Honoka, there was a constant urge to get more physical with people that was just… not going to happen.  
  
Fumie really seemed to relax about thirty minutes into their date-not-date. Enough to ask a few questions about her time as a school idol, which was apparently something she’d been too anxious to pursue until then. Getting stopped a few times for photos with fans was a nice surprise too.  
  
Eli and Nozomi… finally existed again. She didn’t trust herself to open that dialog now, but just knowing they’d been thinking about her helped a lot. An unexpected cap on an already very satisfying day… just one thing left to do before the clock turned over.  
  
Maki stopped tapping the worn cellophane bag against her hip and untied the thin pink ribbon for the last time. This “bunny” wasn’t even a bunny at all. When she realized what it was, she knew it’d be the last one she ate, even if it had gotten rather banged up over the month.  
  
It was a tiny chocolate Nico nesoberi… only it was winking and making kissy lips. Utterly ridiculous… and completely adorable. How Nico had found the time to get so fancy with the chocolate sculpting was beyond her. This was seriously some high-level work.  
  
Unceremoniously, she pecked it on the face and popped it in. Only the head had the filling, but it had somehow managed to remain just as tasty as the first strawberry one she’d tried. She chewed, she savored, she swallowed…  
  
“Nico-chan…”  
  
“She’s going to be alright, you know,” Honoka gently replied, a surprise without the jolt. A surprisingly welcome addition to the moment.  
  
“Maybe,” Maki replied without turning.  
  
“She knows she’ll always have us, even if her job is being stupid right now.”  
  
“This is supposed to be her dream coming true. I don’t like the idea of it going wrong for her… or her having to give up any more than she already has.”  
  
“She’s not going to lose us, Maki-chan,” Honoka assured, sliding her arms around her from behind. Maki leaned back into the hug and let out a long breath.  
  
“This has just been… it’s just been a long month. I’ve gotten spoiled. Selfish.”  
  
“You can always talk to us about it.”  
  
“I know,” Maki sighed turning around to face her, surprising the older girl as she looped her arms over Honoka’s shoulders, “Turns out that’s one of the things I… might not excel in. I’ll do better.”  
  
“Maki-chan?” Honoka began, wide eyed and unaccustomed to any response at all, let alone reciprocation from the girl when giving affection. Her eyes widened even further as the younger girl leaned in and pressed her lips to her cheek, “You… I…”  
  
Maki breathed deep as she slid back, pulling her lips away just before reaching Honoka’s. She let her arms slid down, breaking Honoka’s loose hug and taking her hand to lead her back inside, “Thank you. Really. We should probably get you back to sleep or you’ll never wake up in time for class.”  
  
“... Yeah,” Honoka agreed, bewildered and obedient.  
  
“I’m not sure I ever told you, but I’m really happy for you, Umi, and Kotori. I think I’d be disappointed if it was any other way.”  
  
“Me too,” Honoka agreed, hugging onto Maki’s arm and nuzzling into her shoulder.  
  
“Just don’t go running off to France forever.”  
  
“Between Umi-chan’s dojo and the shop, there’s no way we would.”  
  
“I don’t think you’ve had real french breads and pastries yet. The threat is real,” Maki teased, resting her cheek in Honoka’s hair as they walked.  
  
“That’s what Kotori-chan says. I’m _really_ excited.”  
  
“Take lots of pictures… or… maybe better yet let Kotori take them.”  
  
“It’s months away,” Honoka whispered, barely discernible over Hanayo’s gentle snoring, “You’ll have to remind me right before we leave.”  
  
“Right, right,” Maki relented, letting Honoka lead her to a spot next to Umi and accepting the spot between the two.  
  
Umi was fully out, so Maki didn’t protest when Honoka snuggled into her side and used her shoulder as a pillow. With so many warm bodies in the room, blankets were entirely unnecessary.  
  
“If you do one of these again soon, let me know?”  
  
“Of course,” Honoka assured, impressively already half-asleep, “I finally got you t’come to one… now you’ve gotta come to them all…”  
  
Surrounded by the remaining people who brought her the most happiness, Maki could only reply, “Have lots, then…,” before she closed her eyes and finding sleep far sooner than she could have imagined.  
  
  
  
\--------------

 

One more planned chapter to go, scheduled to go up on the 14th. I’d originally only planned for the White Day story, so now I’ve gotta go through and practically rewrite the whole thing! So tragic. Also, I’ve got about half of the illustrations I’d planned for the last chapter dropped in, so feel free to revisit the second chapter to enjoy some messy Makis and some inappropriate Nicos. <3


	4. White Day Chocolates

**March 14**

**8:07 AM**

 

“Wow, looks like you made it after-all... and you remembered your outfit this time! I was starting to think Maki-chan was just avoiding gettin’ sweaty with us, nya~,” Rin teased with a hip bump as they passed each other in the hallway.  
  
“Feh, Who would sweat at _your_ pace? I heard you’re finally earning that cat reputation with how lazy you’ve gotten,” Maki shot back with a ghost of a smile, adjusting her hold on her gym bag “You sure I won’t be getting in the way?”  
  
“That depends on whether you actually eat today. Did Mom get any breakfast in you before you snuck out? No more passing out after classes, right?”  
  
“Nn,” Maki grunted noncommittally, “I ate.”  
  
“What? Like a cherry tomato or two on the way out the door?” Rin deadpanned with a glare.  
  
“... I had three,” Maki shrugged, knowing how bad that sounded, “It’s a step up.”  
  
“Nyuh huh, sure. Maki-chan’s coming to the club room during lunch right?”  
  
“Council work. Sorry.”  
  
Undaunted, Rin replied, “Kayo-chin and I’ll bring you something… and then we’re going to _sit there_ until you _eat_ it.”  
  
Biting back a futile and ill-conceived “Yeah, well… I’ll eat you” retort, Maki nodded and just went with, “Thanks. See you then.”  
  
“Later, nya~” Rin twirled, leaving for her classroom as Maki, who was running a bit later than usual, continued toward the club room.  
  
She’d really just meant to swing by. Drop off some notated lyric pages for Oda and the gym bag carrying her workout outfit for after classes. Lighten her day’s load. In and out. On with her day.  
  
However, the entire day’s plans we completely derailed and her still sleep-addled brain seared to full attention when she opened the door to find the club’s former illustrious president, now nationally-recognized idol personality, decked out in her old Otonokizaka uniform with her ankles crossed on the table, leaning her chair back at a near impossible angle, with a Godiva white chocolate sampler on her lap, only ⅔ full.  
  
  
  
It was a goddamn miracle Maki didn’t drop everything on the floor while her brain completed its reboot process.  
  
It had been nearly a month since she’d seen Nico in person. … almost as long since she’d answered any message.  
  
A month since they shared one of their most personal, most emotionally validating and intimate evenings ever.

Twenty-five days since the last time she’d received a response on any account Nico had that wasn’t a notification that said account had been deactivated or suspended.  
  
Five hundred and ninety-seven hours of no real answers. No chance for explanations. No reasons given from the rest of the Yazawa family that weren’t telling evasions as more and more µ's alumni sacrificed their own social media accounts’ access to Nico’s in vain attempts to reconnect the two.  
  
Nearly two weeks worth of increasingly terrible sleep as horrible potential scenarios plagued her dreams, and a slow heartbreaking acceptance that she very well may have lost Nico forever.  
  
… and then, out of nowhere? There she is. The day after her fan meet in Australia and a week before her scheduled second appearance in Korea. Rising world sensation, national treasure, and holder of the key to _far_ too much of her heart, Yazawa Nico. In the flesh. Hiding in the old clubroom. Eating white chocolate and glaring at the wall where the ARISE poster used to hang. Her hair back up in their old nostalgic twin-tails and staring blankly with a silent intensity that should have curled the paint.  
  
“N… Good morning,” Maki offered in a distant voice, falling back on the social script since she was in no way prepared to handle the maelstrom of emotions that the sight before her ignited.  
  
Every nerve in Maki’s body was electrified. Every fiber of her being screamed to verify the reality before her… only barely held back by the context of the scene.

Nico had not so much as looked her way, just staring ahead as she chewed, another piece at the ready. She swallowed, continued staring ahead, and offered a slow, deep, “Yo,” in reply before shoving in the next piece.  
  
No explanation as to what was going on, why she was here, where she’d been, or even what was up with the chocolates… just… ‘yo.’  
  
The absurdity was staggering. Since the pathways to her mouth were fried or being redirected toward some kind of mounting explosion, Maki let her body continue its intended task after weighing the choice of going around the table directly through the woman’s field of vision or risk bumping into that precariously balanced chair.  
  
Talking just… wasn’t an option right now. This entire scene was impossible. Unnatural. Something had clearly pissed Nico off and it had to be in a class of its own.  
  
Unable to look away, Maki almost froze as she passed through the woman’s direct line of sight, particularly after her dead-eye glare flicked up to meet her gaze. Almost.  
  
Nico popped in another.  
  
Maki crossed the room.  
  
She tucked her bag under the whiteboard and frowned. The entire reason her past month had been such a nightmare was because she hadn’t been able to get any answers, or even contact, with the person who was sitting there. Nico was _right there._ This was really happening. She wasn’t far enough gone to be at the point of delusion.  
  
Nico had come here for a _reason_ . She wasn’t at home. She hadn’t called anyone to her knowledge, any one of the girls would have told her immediately. She had come _here…_ even though all she was doing was pounding down Godiva and glaring.  
  
… Maybe it was for her.  
  
Damning the consequences and cautiously optimistic that this wouldn’t end terribly, Maki slid a chair out directly across from Nico and sat. Nico wasn’t staring at the wall anymore. When Maki settled, Nico’s eyes were exclusively and penetratingly on her.  
  
All the thrill and none of the comfort. Just blinding turmoil and passion barely held in check by the desire to fix what had wronged the woman before her. Maybe put a smile back on her face. Wouldn’t she be proud to know that all of that idol training still held sway?  
  
‘Want to talk about it?’ ‘What’s going on with you?’ ‘What’s with the chocolate?’ ‘Who pissed you off this morning?’ ‘Who do I have to murder for taking over your social media?’ ‘Those won’t help you grow the way you want, you know.’ ‘I miss you, you idiot. Get over here before I rip this table in two to get to you.’ ‘What’s good, cavity kid?’  
  
None of those felt appropriate… this was an first. An loud, prominently angry Nico had been common before she hit the big leagues. A silently angry Nico was a new kind of awful. Particularly after being shut out so completely. It was unnerving how they’d managed to sit still for these ten eternal silent seconds.  
  
Nico popped in another piece.  
  
No, this wasn’t anger. This was hurt. That glare wasn’t a threat to go away. It was a challenge, daring her to just try and pry… which of course she would. Didn’t Nico know that _she_ was the one that should be silently sulking and waiting to be comforted?  
  
Ugh… this was _not_ the time for that.  
  
The longer the moment stretched, the more Maki’s heart twisted as a month’s worth of ‘what if’s and ‘maybe’s wracked her imagination. Today was White Day, a day she’d always been able to ignore in its entirety thanks to never having exchanged valentine’s friends chocolate with someone who didn’t also gift her on the same day, which explained the box in perhaps the most unsettlingly upsetting fashion she could fathom.  
  
Nico had become far more secretive with her personal affairs since graduation. Vastly amped in the flirtation, but somehow more guarded than ever. So… did one of those secrets include an _actual_ affair? Possibly with a boy? A boy that had replied to her confectionarily expressed feelings with a case of gaudily wrapped, mid-range quality sweets? The very thought would have dropped the floor out from under her if it wasn’t for one very specific fact.  
  
Nico had spent nearly all of Valentine’s Day with _her._  
  
Nico’s surprise appearance and painstakingly crafted hand-made chocolates were adorable and delicious. Hand-crafted chocolate bunnies, each tailored to all of µ's specific tastes and preferences. Kotori had white chocolate cartoonish flop faces (which Umi accepted and promised to pass one). Honoka’s was shaped like a bunny “loaf.” Umi’s was a chocolate quiver of chocolate heart arrows with a bunny face on the side while Kayo-chin’s was shaped like an onigiri with rabbit ears.  
  
Her’s had been a bounty of rich dark chocolate bite-sized, three-dimensionally molded rabbits, filled with a dark chocolate ganache that couldn’t have been cheap or easy to manage. Given after the others. _Privately._ Individually crafted with different expressions. Half had markings signifying them to be her, half of them intended to represent Nico.  
  
She’d almost cried after seeing them. Nico may as well have dipped her while holding a rose between her teeth and told her she was her forever girl for how personally Maki had taken the gesture.  
  
Things had been… so… _so_ good. She felt like she had finally gotten relatively competent at conveying her interest. Nico’s flirtations had been getting progressively less subtle and into the blatant and frequently overtly sexual which had been both intimidating and intoxicating.  
  
But now she was locking eyes with one of the most important people in her life, who was sitting with evidence supporting her infrequent allusions that she may be “riding” a secret boyfriend, and Maki couldn’t even think of how to start a conversation. Nico certainly didn’t seem to be in the mood. She just sat there, slouching, chewing, and staring.  
  
Screw the past month’s insecurities… Nico had come _here_ , where _she_ could find her. She wouldn’t freeze up now. She would _find_ a way to make whatever had happened right. Since Maki still couldn’t find the words, she fell back on body language… which is to say she leaned forward, forearms on the table, and asked with her eyebrows.  
  
Nico, who had been just about to plop yet another piece in her mouth, stopped and _slowly_ put it back into the tray. Finally, a reaction. Just as slowly, she eased the chair back down onto all fours, uncrossed her legs, put the tray on the table, and leaned in to mimic Maki’s position.  
  
“You want one?” Nico asked, nodding toward the tray.  
  
“Would that help?” Maki asked, her voice cracking as she finally found the appropriate words to convey her concern.  
  
Nico turned to the tray again. She side-eyed Maki and stood, circling around the table the long way and dragging the tray along with a single finger. The general ruckus outside, blissfully unaware of the tension in the room, blotted out entirely to the sound of that tray scraping along the table.  
  
She stopped at Maki’s side, scraping a chair out and turning it so that its back kept them separated. She straddled the chair, blindly reached into the box and readied a piece.  
  
“Say, ‘Ah,’” Nico deadpanned.  
  
Maki’s mouth had never felt drier than this moment. Not even when Papa found her Bibi promotional photosets. She swallowed and opened, remembering after a moment of inactivity to add, “... Ah.”  
  
For the first time, Nico’s expression broke. The ghost of a smirk as she popped the piece in.  
  
Dark chocolate filling. A truffle. When it came to sweet things, Nico could apparently do no wrong.  
  
“This is just between us,” Nico said, soft and gentle, adding to the dreamlike nature of the encounter. A contrast to her steely expression to which Maki could only nod.  
  
She just popped another piece in her mouth and readied the next that would be intended for Maki.  
  
Coconut shaving. Solid dark chocolate. A cordial cherry, which she enjoyed the mouthfeel of far more than than the taste, a bit of trivia she’d shared in private months ago. Espresso bean. Another truffle. Finally, a strawberry creme… a reminder of a scent and flavor that had long ago risen to her be among her favorites. Maki managed to lean forward enough to brush Nico’s fingers with her lips on that one... too much?  
  
The tray was empty now. After a bit of chewing, Maki broke the silence again with, “We’ll have to get some water in us soon… that’s a lot of sugar first thing in the morning.”  
  
With that, Nico’s expression finally relaxed. She’d stopped meeting her eyes, but she was smiling now, “Sure thing, Dr. Nishikino.”  
  
“... thanks for sharing,” Maki continued, trying to avoid another slip into silence.  
  
“Don’t mention it... Heh. Feeding my best girl chocolates on White Day. What does that make us then?”  
  
Nico was staring at her old Honto Leap poster when she said it, but she looked so peaceful now, settled into a somewhat melancholic smile.  
  
She…  
  
She was just so _achingly_ beautiful to her in this moment. Absence and the threat of total loss had clearly taken the limiter on her affection away. The thought that she had gotten those chocolates from anyone else was acid in her throat, evoking a bitter, wrathful voice in her heart to spit and howl at the heavens, “Mine! MINE!”  
  
“Technically,” Maki answered, unable to look away and unwilling to stop herself from saying, “Wouldn’t this make _me_ your boyfriend?” She hoped she didn’t sound as bitter as that felt.  
  
Nico blinked and her eyes were locked back on her’s. Her brow creased and her lip quirked. It started as a snort and quickly sputtered out, but she clearly got a laugh out of her. Her expression tightened more as skepticism took the lead. Maki swallowed… did she misread the mood? This wasn’t being mistaken for levity as she’d assumed. Anything said now? It was serious.  
  
Nico stood, claiming rare height advantage and leaned close. Chocolate, of course, was on her breath, a lovely accompaniment to her perpetual strawberry aura, “You’d like that. Wouldn’t you?”  
  
Was this it?  
  
Was this the moment where she could just be... blatantly honest?  
  
What words could possibly suffice to finalize the year’s worth of tentative back and forth probing? Was this Nico giving her a last chance to come clean before disappearing for good? It’s not like Maki had ever been the most communicative… or hasty… but as Nico’s weight started to shift back away, her taunt unanswered, Maki’s hand moved unbidden.  
  
She grabbed the ribbon at Nico’s collar and pulled her back down… closer than before. Close enough that the slightest mistake would finally break this year’s worth of tension one way or the other.  
  
“You already know the answer to that, don’t you?” Maki replied softly, reveling in the shock in Nico’s eyes before forcing herself to release the bow and leaning back into her seat. She made a show of smoothing out her own blazer as she struggled to reign it back in.  
  
But it seemed Nico would have none of that. Her hands were suddenly on her cheeks, forcibly turning her face back up.

Nico’s shock had given way to sharp annoyance. Her fingers were claws at her jaw. Harshly, she whispered, “What the hell are you playing at, _Maki_ ?”  
  
Maki had never felt so grateful to be in the sights of Nico’s ire. Her body surged with a cocktail of fear, love, anger, lust, frustration, and sugar… so when Nico continued with a terse, “Is this all just some _game_ to you?” … the ugliness she’d spent the past four months pretending didn’t exist and the full of the past month’s heartache selfishly snapped to the surface.  
  
Nico seemed wholly unprepared for Maki to rise, full of passion and face twisted in fury. Her hands at Nico’s collar and pressing her back into the cabinets of videos behind her.  
  
“A **_game_ ** ?” Maki hissed, her vision blurred. Nico’s grip loosened, almost letting go as Maki spun her around and shoving her back toward the table, not letting go even after pushing her down onto the table.  
  
“ _THIS? US? …_ has _never_ been a game to _me_ , **_Nico_ **.”

“Maki!? What the hell are yo-” Nico began, wide-eyed and now squirming away, but stopping cold at seeing the tears spilling freely down Maki’s cheeks.  
  
“You want to talk about _games?”_ Maki hitched, wanting to stop, but even after biting her regrettably chapped lips hard enough to draw blood she was unable to stifle a year’s worth of pressure and the aftermath of the worst month of her life. Fire overpowering her better senses, Maki raged, “Let’s start with how you always _push_ . Made me fucking _believe_ all of the ridiculous _shit_ you constantly tell me.”  
  
Knowing she should stop, and fully aware of how unfair this was of her, Maki continued at a higher cry-strained falsetto pitch, “ _You’re so amaaaazing, Maki-chan~! Nico loves her Maki-chan soooo much~! We’ll always be together, Maki-chan!~_ ” “ _You better message me anytime you’re_ **_lonely_ ** _~”_ getting closer with each imitation before getting nose to nose and whispering in English, “ _You’re my best girl.”_  
  
She shoved Nico deeper into the table one more time before letting go and pulling back enough with a shrill growl. Her voice frustratingly ragged as the surge passed, leaving near instant regret and bitter emptiness, “... and then µ's... disbanded. The contracts ended and you disappear with your new one. The magazines quit calling. The hits dwindled on the website. I became a second year. Kotori’s flown off to France. Nozomi and Eli disappear from the face of the planet. Honoka and Umi became official. I finally catch up and realize I probably I missed my chance. I catch Rin fucking... _grinding_ on Hanayo... right there on the edge of the table.”  
  
Nico has risen enough to support herself on her elbows, watching Maki rage, pace, and deflate before the redhead sat on the table next to her, facing the wall. This was horrible. It wasn’t supposed to go like this. This wasn’t _about_ **_her_ ** _._ Maki slumped over, spent, laying her cheek on Nico’s lap because the raw emotion on Nico’s face is too distracting. Mostly because she just so desperately wanted to be _touching_ her… _anywhere._ This was just the only way she trusted herself to do that without it escalating… and she was too selfish to just refrain entirely.

Still, if she stopped now, she might never get another chance. “ **_You_ ** disappear from everywhere that isn’t TV or the internet… and… and I **_KNOW_ ** it’s not your fault but… then I have my first three fucking engagement interviews. Can you believe it? Three “fine men” that have never even heard of µ's. Three “gentlemen” that are _vetted_ and of _good breeding_ looking to get in on the family name. Getting my ducks in a row so I don’t get _distracted_ by things like that in college.”  
  
“Shit, Maki… why didn’t you say something sooner?”  
  
Nico’s hand was in her hair now. Soothing, comforting. Just like after they’d beat ARISE for their shot at the Love Live. Just like when she’d really started to stop denying her own feelings, at least to herself. How did such a simple gesture have the right to be so powerful? Why did it have to feel so goddamn _wonderful?_  
  
The tears redoubled and her voice began to reflect exactly how pathetic she felt.  
  
“I did. To the only account that didn’t bounce back after the Saturday following Valentines Day. Your old kicksmilegrl95 email… nothing else worked. I… sent a lot to it. After Honoka got blocked trying to tell you, I couldn’t let you get cut off from anyone else. Just the thought made me sick … almost as much as the thought of where _that_ could have come from,” Maki replied, reaching out and flicking the empty Godiva case.  
  
Nico continued teasing her hair, just slower now. The noise from outside the club room had almost completely petered out. Maki could feel Nico’s tension from her lap. These were taboo topics. These were the unspeakables of their relationship and she’d practically opened with them. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go _at all._ **_She was screwing up the last chance she was going to get._ **  
  
“Maki…”  
  
This wasn’t a conversation, this was the wreckage catching fire.

Another dam broke in her chest, flooding it with enough to start curling inward. Before she knew it, she was talking again, “I’m sorry. We keep doing this… back and forth whatever it is that we do… but when you graduated. When µ's disbanded…. I feel like I… like I lost my ability to be useful to you. Someone else was writing your music now… Why would I complicate your career, your life, with something like… all of this?”  
  
“What the hell, Maki…” Nico breathed. She sounded exasperated.  
  
“I’m serious,” Maki continued, her eyes useless so she left them closed, “What else **_is_ ** there to me!? Music is the only defining thing I have to offer… it’s the only reason I got to have _any_ of you in my life! I was always so excited everytime you turn up because... I don’t know… maybe _this’ll_ be the time. I’m just… I’m always so busy… and you’re always busy… and then you disappeared and I… and I… I don’t know how to say _any_ of this.”  
  
“... Well that explains why you’d get so extra when I do come around…”

Extra? The connotation didn’t sit well… but then again, nothing was ‘sitting well’ at the moment, so Maki just continued, “... I was so _happy_ when I saw you last month. Up until then, before we talked on the roof? I just kept expecting every time I see you to be the last.”  
  
Voice tight, Nico groused, “Isn’t that kind of extreme? Does Maki-chan have so little faith in her Nico?”  
  
“You’re not just my Nico,” Maki whispered, “Idols are for everyone, right?”  
  
"I hadn’t heard from Kotori in months, and Nozomi or Eli since before they left. It’s not like I’ve tried very hard to reach out because… I don’t know, because I’m a complete moron. You were just always so busy… and I was just some stupid second year high school student,” Maki explained, still struggling to get her voice under control but failing completely as she squeaked out, “What happened? Why did we all get cut out??”  
  
“Contract obligations,” Nico explained simply, her voice on edge, “There was some backlash from last month. I’m sorry, but can we take a step back and talk about you **_getting engaged_ ** ?”  
  
“I’m not engaged to _anyone_ ,” Maki replied a little too sharply, wishing she had just stayed quiet but unable to stop, “You know, I completely forgot how things were before you and the girls. This was always the plan. I get to learn medicine, save lives, and play the piano in exchange for being an opportunity to lure fresh blood and business contacts to the family... and then later pop out an heir. Before µ's, I thought it was only natural and then before _you_ , I’d accepted it.”  
  
“And now?” Nico almost whispered. The woman’s heart was pounding hard enough to be felt through her thigh, which Maki’s cheek had somehow found. When had Nico’s skirt gotten hiked up so far?  
  
“Now, I just study, push it off for later, and enjoy what I can of what’s left of our time in µ's. After the miais, I haven’t seen much of my parents. It… got ugly. Really ugly.”  
  
“So… what do you want?” Nico asked, her voice soft as if the violence of moments ago had never happened, “What leads to Nishikino Maki being happy?”  
  
Maki scrunched her eyes tighter and scrubbed at them viciously. She sniffed and laughed bitterly, her voice cracking as she answered, “Stupid romantic bullshit that would ruin more lives than my own. For now? Short term? A promise that you aren’t going to just vanish someday again completely, even if we have to pretend this talk never happened.”  
  
“No chance of that,” Nico scolded, clenching Maki’s hair tighter and yanking sharply, “I’ve been waiting for your stupid tsun-self to open up like this for years. If I would have known some damn chocolate and a time-out would do the trick… Tch, either way, you try to close back up and I’ll knock your perfect teeth out.”  
  
“... You shouldn’t talk to your boyfriend that way,” Maki sulked, earning a genuine bark of laughter from the woman.  
  
“Alright. Short term. Today. What would make you happy? Little miss Class Rep is going to be late for class and I’m pretty sure I just ruined your whole day by sneaking in here to sulk.”  
  
Maki sniffed and grabbed Nico’s wrist, digging her nails in until she heard Nico hiss. “First of all, we’re leaving. Together. My place.”  
  
“Second, you’re going to explain _that_ ,” Maki continued, nudging toward the empty candy tray, “... preferably over food.”  
  
“What? You’re still hungry?”  
  
Incredulously, Maki’s medical common sense took over and insisted, “I’m not going to let you go through the day having only eaten like… what… fifty pieces of chocolate?”  
  
“It wasn’t _that_ much…”  
  
“Regardless,” Maki bypassed while relenting her grip on her wrist to a gentler hand-hold, “ _Third,_ you showing up will _never_ ruin my day. So, before you go and disappear again, I want to spend it with you.”  
  
“What? You wanna go to your place so you can beat me up some more in private?” Nico asked, light and joking, but still missing the idol pitch flair. Her real voice. Not a recording. The real thing.  
  
“If we go wandering around in uniform, we’re going to get stopped. I don’t want to give people a reason to get in our way. Either way we’d need a change of clothes... and you never did come back around the house to pick up your old backup workout outfit,” Maki explained matter-of-factly, “Also, _yes_ . I still feel the need to beat you up.”  
  
“You should lead with that for those… marriage... interview… things. That’ll help chase those guys off. Most of ‘em anyways. Some of us like things a little rough~”  
  
Maki scowled and sat up, “Tch, can we just go?”  
  
“Of course… so… what’s the plan when we get there, hot stuff? I don’t know how long I can hide away, so is this going to be more of the usual, or is this the real deal? Real talk?”  
  
Since the waterworks had started, Maki was finding it very hard to turn it off. She glared at the ceiling and growled, “If we’re going to do this, I want to just… do it. I’m sick of not knowing where _we_ stand. I hate it.”  
  
Nico slid off the table and paced to its other side to chuck the tray in the trash as Maki continued, never letting her out of her sight. She pushed her chair in and asked, “Yeah… I know _I’ve_ made a lot of assumptions... This… isn’t really the kind of thing you just come out and ask about.”  
  
“Like you’ve ever cared about propriety before… particularly in private,” Maki groused, “Besides, I’m pretty sure this is _exactly_ the kind of thing you’re _supposed_ to talk about.”  
  
“This is different. You’re different…” Nico murmured, “... and I stand by what I’ve always said. You’re special.”  
  
A final breath finally brought back enough composure for her to keep her cheeks dried. She reached for her bag and started to rummage, “It just took me a while to realize that when _you_ said it, you meant it in a good way.” She pulled out a face mask and hooked it around her ears, “Stop by class with me. I want to make an appearance. One look at this face and no one will give me any crap tomorrow.”  
  
“You sure I should come with?”  
  
“Honestly?... I just don’t want to let you out of my sight,” Maki confessed, quiet enough that Nico could have legitimately bothered her to repeat it… but apparently respected the sentiment enough not to.

 

**\------------**

 

Sure enough, one look at Maki’s face (and who was idling outside the door) was more than enough for Fumie to volunteer taking over the class rep responsibilities for the day. A quick stop by 202 had Hanayo rushing out and shoving them toward the exit. It was the first time Maki had ever seen Hanayo look so intense over something not idol related. She looked like there was a lot she was holding back, but she did hug the now _significantly_ slighter Nico with ferocity and confide how happy she was to see her. She also told Maki that they wouldn’t wait up for her tonight and that she should take all the time she needs. Nico’s expression suggested that she’d need some clarification on that later.  
  
Nico followed in silence, prepping the face-mask, shades, hair cover combo that they’d all wearily become accustomed to. Maki finished her own cover-up at the foot-lockers where she kept those effects. The silence was fitting. She’d said too much already. What was she even thinking, throwing all of that out in one go? Still, Nico must have noticed the increased pace of Maki’s downward spiral, because without a word she had taken her hand.  
  
No one could read Nishikino Maki like Yazawa Nico.  
  
Maki held on as tightly as she could. She readjusted the grip so their fingers could lock. She latched onto that arm as Nico had a month ago on that roof. It may have been too much, because there was a slight tremble from the smaller woman.  
  
It was another commute made almost entirely in silence. This wasn’t altogether uncommon. Comfortable silences were one of their things. Sometimes, Maki would fill the void with music and Nico with song. Sometimes, when the sky was clear, they’d just lay and watch the stars, breaking the silence only when Nico would double-check the knowledge that Maki had handed down.

This wasn’t one of those silences. This… was heavy. This was a cloud of tension a year in the making, choking her voice and strangling her heart with a promise that this really could be the end of all things, regardless of how kind and supportive Nico was continuing to be.

 

**8:57 AM**

 

“So, things went sideways between you and your parents?” Nico asked, breaking the silence as the Nishikino home came into view.  
  
“That’s one way of putting it.”  
  
“Your Dad doesn’t surprise me, but I really thought your Mom woulda been better about it.”  
  
“It surprised me too,” Maki admitted, still latched on to Nico’s arm and calmed down significantly. Crying was always good for that… and just finally getting to be near Nico again was every bit as healing as she assumed it would be.  
  
“I still don’t know what brought you back here, but… thank you. I hope this doesn’t get you into too much trouble,” Maki sighed, finally having reclaimed enough presence of mind to acknowledge other people’s troubles again.  
  
“Eh. Strike two of three… and if they think the current arrangement is sustainable, they’ve got another thing coming. That asshole’s gone too far.”  
  
“Who?” Maki prompted as they passed the gate.  
  
“My producer. The contract has the usual “no dating” B.S. but he’s taking it to a stupid and entirely unacceptable level… and then has the gall to leave that box on my desk? Hell no.”  
  
Maki blinked, “Your producer gave you that case?”  
  
“I left some fairly generic homemade choco for the whole office. You know, professional courtesy. As you do when you’re the sweet and eternally positive one. He took it _weird_ and has gotten extra creepy ever since. First time I’ve ever regretted giving out sweets.”  
  
“Creepy?” Maki prompted, stomach churning.  
  
“Really creepy. Unacceptably creepy. Deep into ‘collecting video evidence with the help of my coworkers to file a suit against him’ levels of creepy,” Nico explained, stroking her thumb over the back of Maki’s hand.  
  
“... Are you okay?”  
  
“Honestly? It’s been a bad month. _Real_ bad. The work and the shows have been great, but everything else has been a living nightmare. That box... and worse, the note attached? Last straw for me. I’ll bleed for this dream, but I’m not going to let it be tainted like this.”  
  
“What can I do to help?” Maki asked, closing the door behind them.  
  
Nico sighed and relaxed, looking around the entryway and settling on her, “You just... you be you, Maki-chan. I’m damn glad it was you that walked in ‘cuz I was just… so pissed off.”  
  
“Come with me to the kitchen. You need to put some water in you.”  
  
“Yeah, I’m feelin’ it… kinda light headed,” Nico admitted as she shrugged off her blazer.  
  
“You feel like you’ve lost over 15kg in the past month… what the hell kind of diet are they putting you on?”  
  
“Damn. Not too far off. Is Maki-chan paying _that_ much attention to Nico’s body~?” the shorter woman teased, sliding her hands down the sides of her blouse.  
  
Maki snorted and finally smiled, “Uhhh… yes? I thought there was just a skeleton under that uniform.”  
  
Nico pouted and slapped her thighs, “Nico has plenty of meat on her! She’s a lean dancing machine!”  
  
Maki intentionally let her gaze remain long enough to ensure Nico would notice and replied, “All the more reason you need real food and fluids. We’ll order in.”  
  
“Aww, Maki-chan doesn’t want to take her Nico out on the town?” Nico pouted in her cutesy voice.  
  
“I’m not sharing you with anyone right now,” Maki replied casually, “How does Macao’s sound? They’re one of the only places open this early that delivers.”  
  
“Oh my god, _yes_ ,” Nico crowed, arms in the air triumphant, “I want _two_ bowls of my usual and an order of the cheesy potato stuff. You got any ice cream too? I DID say I was going to cheat like crazy when I got to see you next.”  
  
“If not, we’ll make a run,” Maki assured, forcing herself to continue into the kitchen to pour the woman a drink instead of tackle her outright. The void following the tears was quickly filling with anxious anticipation and full acknowledgement of the potential of their situation.  
  
“I should have skipped Sydney and just come here,” Nico laughed as she followed Maki in, “Don’t get me wrong, it was amazing, but like, not even an hour with you and it’s like I remembered what being happy _actually_ feels like!”  
  
Maki nearly dropped Nico’s glass, but played it off as a flourish in offering, “You got enough strength left in those matchstick arms to hold this? It’s pretty full.”  
  
“What? No straw? Barbarian!” Nico winked and accepted the glass before flexing, “I just lugged your emotional baggage all the way from Otonoki, so don’t go questioning these ladies.”  
  
“Oh hoh, I haven’t even _started_ with the emotional crap, Nico-chan,” Maki groaned, pouring a glass of her own, “I actually spent most of the walk trying to figure out where to start. It might be faster to just have you read it.”  
  
“You kept writing to a blocked account?” Nico replied between sips, “Unexpectedly romantic, my lovely tomato.”  
  
“It wasn’t blocked at first. It was the only thing I could find that wasn’t,” Maki shrugged, feeling lighter than she had in ages.  
  
“Did I miss selfies too?”  
  
Maki grinned, pulled out her phone and opened it to her photos, “Start here, you’ll recognize the earlier stuff. Keep going after the RinPanaCocoro stuff. There’s some great shots of Honoka tackling snuggling everyone and then some where we dragged Cocoro to a sleepover at Umi’s. I’ll make the call on the landline.”  
  
“Jeez, you still have one of those?” Nico teased and then, upon actually looking at the phone,  immediately squealed, “Oh! Cocoro!!! My baby girl! You took her for pancakes!? Awww, I miss her _so much_ ! She looks like she’s having so much fun. I told her you girls would love her.”  
  
As Maki picked up the receiver to make the call, Nico stopped her with a hand on her shoulder, “Hey… hold up.”  
  
When Maki turned back, Nico was displaying a picture that was a few down the line. The selfie she’d taken after the first miai. Runny mascara, red eyes from crying, the whole deal. She hadn’t deleted any pictures since she first got the phone, so the idea hadn’t even occurred to her to clean up afterwards. To be honest, she’d completely forgotten about the picture.  
  
Softly, Nico asked, “A lot happened between you and Rin being snuggly and this. You kept texting long after the block too, didn’t you? Can I go back and read it?”  
  
Wordlessly, Maki nodded, took the phone back, navigated to the last selfie that Nico sent, and offered the phone back.  
  
Eyes locked, Nico accepted and Maki reached in to press her finger to Nico’s lips. “Let me call in this order before you say anything,” Maki advised, and then guided Nico’s face to the side. She rested her other hand on Nico’s concerningly bony hip and eased in to place a slow kiss on the smaller woman’s cheek.  
  
Maki pulled back, turned, and tried not to thrill at the dumbstruck expression she was walking away from. It took until Maki’s call had reached the actual ordering part that Nico was able to redirect her eyes back to the phone.  
  
After the call ended, Nico beckoned her to come closer, which she obviously obliged. The brief glance Maki caught of the phone showed the distant shot of Fumie, giving Maki a time reference for where in the one-way conversation Nico had reached. The shorter woman took Maki’s hand again and asked, “You sure it’s gonna just be us today? I don’t wanna freak Waki out by finding us chilling on the couch or anything.”  
  
Ouch.  
  
“That… won’t be a problem. However, I’m not sure of my parent’s schedule and I’d just as soon not have my first real conversation in weeks be about skipping classes. Let’s grab the shoes in case they show up and head up to my room?”  
  
“Sure, I bet Kuro-tan misses her Mama. She can have my lap if I get yours? I want to finish reading this.”  
  
“I’ll grab the shoes and meet you up there?” Maki offered, weary from the intense emotional whiplash of the morning.  
  
“Nope. I’m not lettin’ go of this hand. It’s mine now.”  
  
A moment of trying to figure out how she’d carry two pairs of shoes with one hand turned out to be more effort than Maki cared to make, so instead she went for the dramatic option, dipping low and scooping Nico up bridal style.  
  
“Wah! Shit, Maki-chan!!” Nico laughed, “ _God,_ you’re so extra… and _beefy_ . What the hell is up with those arms?”  
  
“This isn’t anything special. _This_ is what happens if you get decent nutrition at least once a week. It’s not like you weigh anything.”  
  
“I guess you’ll just have to **_feed me_ ** ,” Nico roared and giggled, kicking her feet as Maki approached the entryway.  
  
“Someone’s got to,” Maki replied dryly, “I’ve been watching you waste away one interview at a time.”  
  
“Awww, Maki-chan’s my biggest faaa~aaaan. She watches aaaall of Nico’s content. I bet you save it all too, you fangirl.”  
  
“Yeah yeah,” Maki groaned, but still smiled.  
  
“I bet you “used” that leg shot about a dozen times by now too. You know Nico doesn’t give that kind of special service to just anyone,” Nico teased.  
  
“Writing my name there was a nice touch. I actually get into that in the emails a little.”  
  
In her most serious voice, Nico replied, “I’m reading those next. Right after cheesy potatoes. I can’t wait to read about Maki-chan’s illicit Nico daydreams~”  
  
Maki started up the stairs, “maiden” in arms who had laid the shoes top down on her stomach as she continued reading. Nico commented lightly, “Just so you know, between the stuff you were telling me here and what you’re doing now, you’re kind of fulfilling about a dozen of my wildest dreams. This past month woulda been a breeze if I had been getting Maki-talk like this the whole time. You opened up _way_ faster than I could have hoped. Aww! You wore the dress again!”  
  
It took a special kind of care to ensure she didn’t bump Nico’s head on the way up the stairs given how closely Maki was watching her expressions as she continued. What she saw broke her heart and she immediately began to regret acquiescing to Nico’s request. The cheer didn’t just drain from Nico’s expression, it inverted. Her lips tightened into a straight line and by the time she reached the end, which didn’t take long, she looked moments from tears.  
  
Quietly, as they crested the stairs and rounded the corner toward the room, Nico offered a solumn, “I’m sorry,” and then a moment later a heated, “I am going to _bury_ that asshole when I get back to the office.”  
  
“I’m sorry about what I said earlier, back in the club room,” Maki replied, nudging her door open with her foot, “You’ll see when you read the emails. I _never_ blamed you for this. I knew better.”  
  
“Of course you did. You’re my best girl,” Nico boasted, pushing the shoes off her stomach, snapping an angled selfie of Maki carrying her, and then tossing the phone on the bed, “Boot up that dinosaur of yours and let me catch up on the Maki time I’ve missed. You keep getting sad at weird things and I’m clearly behind on the latest Nishikino news.”  
  
“If you’re sure,” Maki agreed, carefully setting Nico back on her feet and padding over to the PC, “It’s not going to be a fun read.”  
  
“Talking about this stuff is hard for anyone. I’ll read the hot-takes and then you can fill me in on the rest,” Nico demanded, taking one of Maki’s arms and looping it around her as she sat, “Stand right here. Don’t you go running off anywhere. I’ve been busy, but not busy enough to not feel lonely too.”  
  
Nico tapped in Maki’s password and clicked her way to her sent folder and waited for the list to propagate, “Jeez, this thing is slow.  A rich girl like you should have something a bit less twentieth century.”  
  
It was a familiar back and forth. Comfortable. Maki groaned, “It’s only four years old. I don’t need anything more than what I have until I graduate. I have the A/V club for the more intense sound editing.”  
  
“Yeah, yeah. Here we go. Wow, you weren’t kidding. You really kept up on things until the end of the month. Put that other arm around me to hold this first one in place. I need my hands for clickin’.”  
  
It was a pleasantly indirect way to ask for a hug, So Maki pressed in as close as she could and leaned over… which absolutely did _not_ work for her chair. The back was too thick, the height would have killed her already cranky back and the angle shoved the backrest into her chest at _just_ the wrong angle, “Give me a sec. I’ll grab the bench and we’ll do side by side?”  
  
“Even better,” Nico replied absently, waiting for the first email to load.  
  
As Maki was across the room, Nico commented, “Damn, you _did_ catch on quick. I was seriously worried you’d think it was me at first. I shoulda known better,” and then went completely silent.  
  
Maki approached with the bench she used for recording on the Yamaha and almost dropped it at the wide eyes and slightly agape mouth on Nico’s expression. A quick glance at the email, which she’d long forgotten the exact contents of, explained it pretty quickly. She was already at the bottom.  
  
\------------  
  
_There’s bigger things that I’m afraid of now. I scared I’ll never get to spend time with you the way we used to. Scared you’ll never know how I really felt. Scared I’ll somehow be forced to settle for anyone that isn’t you. Scared… that you’ll find someone else._ _  
_ _  
_ _Really, I’m scared of that more than anything._

 _  
_ _For me, it can’t be anyone besides you. I’m not good with this sort of thing, and I don’t think I could share my life with anyone who wasn’t part of last year. It changed my life, which sounds cheesy, but… I’m absolutely serious. There’s no going back for me now. Sure, I’m going to keep working toward being a doctor, but I can’t give up music completely. I can’t anymore than I could give up you._

 _So… I guess I’ll talk at you tomorrow. Hanayo’s going to keep me up to date on your schedule since I can’t see most of your usual early-notice methods anymore. Hopefully a pathetic, needy Maki isn’t too offputting to you._ _  
_ _  
_ _I love you._

 _Idiot._  
  
\------------  
  
Ah. Right. It wasn’t just events recorded in these. Maki froze in place as well… for just a moment. Then she really did drop the bench… right onto her foot.

 

**10:03 AM**

 

“Macao’s is seriously one of the places I miss the most on the road. Double eggy bliss,” Nico groaned, sporking in another bite of tonkatsu don and flopping back on the bed.  
  
“I really didn’t think you’d get through even half of what you did. Where did you even put it?” Maki teased, her foot elevated and wrapped, “Pass the potatoes?”  
  
“Nn nn. My potato. Cheesy cheesy potato. You’ll have to come and get ‘em,” Nico teased back, but acquiescing after a moment regardless.

Nico had finished reading through the sent folder moments before the doorbell rang. The two agreed that there would be no conversation about its contents until after they had eaten… which would probably be about now. There was an understandable silent tension hanging between them. One had let literally everything show. The other… more guarded than ever… and it was a complete flip of what either would have predicted.  
  
Maki picked at the container, stirring more than eating. They’d also taken the time to dress a little more casually. Nico had donned her old reliable workout gear (commenting frequently about how unsettlingly baggy they’d become) and Maki was sporting her double-x oversized Make Smile tour schedule T-shirt and an old pair of track shorts.  
  
“Before we get into this… I want you to know that if you want, I’ll pull out all the stops to get you and Waki reconnected. I’ve got resources now.”  
  
“I figured I’d leave that up to her,” Maki replied, finally scooping a satisfying looking bite, “She could get in legal trouble if she tries before I turn eighteen.”  
  
“Yeah… but that’s not too far off. Just think about it. I don’t think I’ve ever been so pissed at your Dad before now.”  
  
“Nn…,” Maki grunted noncommittally, instead taking the time to shovel in cheesy carbs.  
  
Silence carried for three more bites before Nico crawled over to rest her head on Maki’s thigh, tapping her finger on her waistband, “So… pretty girl… where do we start? There’s a lot going on in those things and I feel like you could use having some control in your life after all that.”  
  
“No preference on your end?”  
  
“Oh, I’ve got some _heavy_ preferences, but we’ll get into that later depending on where this conversation goes,” Nico teased with a wink, “Like I said, you spilled a lot there. I feel like it’s only fair that you take lead. You _did_ say you wanted to stop dancing around and just get things out, right?”  
  
“Right,” Maki nodded anxiously. No sense in messing around anymore. She swallowed, took a deep breath and asked, “So… what would it take, you think? For us to…”

“We can’t,” Nico interrupted flatly, waiting a beat before continuing, “ _Not..._ until you’ve confessed properly.”  
  
...  
  
“ ** _What?!_ ** ” Maki gaped, “You’re kidding.”  
  
“Come on, Maki. This is standard fare. This is how people, you know, _human_ people, do this,” Nico droned, drawing slow circles on Maki’s stomach, “You confess, I reply.”  
  
“Since when do we do _anything_ normally!?”  
  
“It’s important to me,” Nico imperiously declared, rolling off of Maki’s lap to lay next to her and began to tick off with her fingers, “It’s one of those traditional things I’ve always wanted. Things I gave up for ‘the life’. A proper confession. A huge, ridiculous, public western-style wedding. A private friends and family only ceremony at Kanda. A glorious, extravagant beach honeymoon. Kids. If you want me to take you seriously, then you should at least be able to say this much, Maki-chan.”  
  
“I… you… you want children?” Maki boggled.  
  
“Gettin’ ahead of yourself there, aren’t you? Come on. Let’s hear it,” Nico continued with a predatory grin, “What did you even call me out here for?”  
  
Maki gaped, flummoxed at the increasingly impatient woman before her. What had she brought Nico out her for? After all this, after reading her innermost thoughts for the past month, she still had the gall to…  
  
Oh. _OH._ _  
_ _  
_ _That was exactly_ what they were here for!  
  
Maki turned with a jolt, Nico flinching away as she tucked her legs under her and winced as she sat on her injured foot. Eyes wide and expression as serious as she could muster, she waited for Nico to mimic her position. Nico looked even more nervous than Maki felt, filling her with confidence.  
  
This _was_ important.  
  
She breathed deep and collected herself.  
  
“Nico-chan… I love you.”  
  
The silence that followed was electric, charged with anticipation that Nico tried to disperse with, “... and?”  
  
“I love you, and I have for some time now.”  
  
A trembling gulp, “... Go on.”  
  
“I know I’m not good at this, but I’ll get better. For you. I… I love so much about you… and… and your family! I _love_ your family. I actually like them better than my own. I... I love being your friend! You’re my best friend. I love it when we make music together… I love your _voice_ and your _enthusiasm_ and… and you’ve changed my life in more ways that I can think of right now and… and I can’t even imagine continuing _any_ of this without you...”  
  
Another deep breath, “and… I… don’t even know how to put this into words that are good enough… but I… if you’re alright with me, would you... go out with me?”  
  
Her face was terminally warm now. Nico looked shaken. Thoroughly. Pale. Like she was barely keeping her posture in place.  
  
After a long steadying breath, Nico replied, her voice firm after a single initial high-pitched crack, “I’m sorry, but I can’t return your feelings at this time. The rules of being an idol are absolute… as are the terms of my contract.”  
  
She kept talking. Maki was sure she was. Her lips were certainly moving… but the world was spinning behind her and the clawing in her heart had finally succeeded in pulling it free. Her vision clouded as heat flowed freely down her face.  
  
That was it.  
  
This was it.  
  
It was over.  
  
Then Nico was in her face, snapping her fingers and ranting as Maki winced away, ““Hey! Oh my god, you only heard half of that, didn’t you? Hey! HEY! You with me? Are you back with us? Good. Now _look at me and_ **_actually listen!_ ** ”  
  
Grumbling something about infuriating tomatoes, Nico collected herself and groused, “Now, what’s the last thing you heard?”  
  
Maki furiously ground her face into her sleeve, “I… I don’t know! Something about your contract…”  
  
“Ugh… you are so useless sometimes,” Nico groused, though through the haze of her clouded vision, Maki could kind of tell she wasn’t angry, “Not that I dislike that side of you.”  
  
“Why are you being such a jerk about this?” Maki whispered. It wasn’t a whine. Definitely not. Certainly not a whimper. Definitely a whisper.  
  
“Oh… Maki… Maki-chan?”  
  
“So… what? Did you… come all the way out here just to make sure you _completely_ break my heart before disappearing again?”  
  
“No!... Well... I mean, you _did_ say I left my clothes here…”  
  
The playfulness of the voice paired with the unreasonably hurtful connotation was enough of a clue-in that even Maki caught on… but even as she laughed at the jab, she kept on crying, “You are such an ass… why did I have to fall for such a jerk?”  
  
“Just lucky I guess. I am. Not you. You’re screwed, Maki-chan… now come over here. Lay your head down. Right here,” Nico soothed, patting her lap which Maki accepted as she sniffed and tried to get the tears to stop. That was the thing about keeping everything under wraps for so long. The pressure just kept growing and when there was an outlet… you get sobbing, snotty, gross Nishikino Maki. Nico didn’t seem to mind. As soon as her head made contact, Nico was stroking her hair, down to her cheeks.  
  
“Shh… it’s alright… do you think you can listen now?”  
  
“Yes…,” Maki barely managed in between sniffs.  
  
“Good… From the start now, and listen all the way to the end this time. I’m sorry, but I can’t return your feelings at this time. The rules of being an idol are absolute… as are the terms of my contract… **_however_ ** , if you’re fine with _me_ and you can wait long enough… I would be honored to pen you in for my future.”  
  
Nico let the statement sit for a moment before continuing, “Do you know how long I spent preparing and practicing that for you!? Jeez… it was _supposed_ to be romantic...”  
  
“Sorry…” Maki replied, still struggling with getting her voice above a whisper.  
  
“Then I’d go on to say that all of that was the obvious public-face reply, and then we’d find somewhere to be alone and I’d get to tell you my real answer…”  
  
“Oh god… you’re so dramatic,” Maki groaned, wiping her eyes.  
  
“I’m not the one breaking down in the middle of someone answering their confession,” Nico snarked.  
  
“ _This is important to me_ ,” Maki growled, rediscovering her voice and shoving at Nico’s shoulder ineffectually, “ ** _You’re_ ** _important to me_ … you… you _absolute_ **_ass_ ** … though I’m starting to question _why_ .”  
  
“There’s my Maki-chan,” Nico replied, back to her gentle voice, curling lower and letting her hair fall as a canopy, “This is the Maki-chan I’d get alone and say that it was about time you quit chickening out and just came out and told me. You were making me nervous, you know? I was starting to believe this was all one-sided. Last month was a little forward, but still…”  
  
Nico began to focus more on slowly tracing Maki’s face while watching sympathetically as the redhead worked through her feelings. The volatile mixture of shame, frustration, and desire continued to fend off the completely unnecessary sensations of heartbreak. She forced her hands down, gripping the blanket beneath her and matching Nico’s calm gaze with an unsteady voice, “Alright, _fine_ then. _We’re alone. I’ve confessed._ I’ve flat out told you that you’ve been right all this time and that I _do_ love you. You hear that? _I._ **Love.** _You._ You **_jerk_ ** . Now what? What comes next in your… your dramatic plan?”  
  
“What do you want to happen?” Nico asked. Her voice was soft. Her expression was playful… but the question felt dangerous. So… so dangerous.  
  
Maki rolled out of Nico’s lap, awkwardly re-assumed her loose seiza position and faced her once more. A deep steadying breath, a final swipe at her face, a stern voice, “Come closer.”  
  
Playful became excited. Eyes gleaming, Nico obliged, scooting until their knees were touching, “Okay.”  
  
Maki moistened her lips, cursing inwardly at how rough and chapped they felt. Self care had _not_ been a priority these past few weeks. Her hands found themselves on Nico’s shoulders and the smaller woman’s breathing grew heavier. Nico mirrored Maki’s subtle lip lick and the moment became unmistakable. Maki leaned in slowly, marveling at just how intensely _docile_ Nico had suddenly become.  
  
The bravado was gone. The overbearing confidence apparently forgotten. Her smile had faded into something vulnerable, something almost… needy? Was she misreading? Was she letting the fire in her chest color her perception? There was a definite tremble with each breath Nico took…  
  
Maki slid a hand up to her cheek, raising her chin slightly. She couldn’t mess this up… she had to be sure, so Maki breathed, “Do you want this?”  
  
Almost immediately, Nico, thoroughly flushed, whispered back, “Yes…,” leaning into Maki’s hand and swallowing before answering again, “Yes. _Please_ , yes…”  
  
Maki closed the distance.  
  
The hand on Nico’s cheek slid around into her hair while the hand on her arm looped around to her back. What started as a light brushing of lips slowly deepened. Despite the rest of her body going almost completely limp, Nico’s lips parted and explored.  
  
Her light shuddering sighs destroyed any hope of Maki regaining coherent thought. She leaned in further, and Nico yielded completely. Now Maki was the one shuddering with each breath as sensation and reality caught fantasy’s attention and reminded it that this was really happening. Nico’s arms crept around her sides and her leg brushed past Maki’s hip, leaning back and incidentally pulling Maki further in.  
  
“God, yes,” Nico whispered into the kiss, “Oh God, yes…”  
  
Maki pressed further, reveling in the sensation of Nico’s surprisingly small, thin lips, the residual taste of their lunch, the way Nico’s lip balm tried to sooth Maki’s chapped edges and how Nico seemed to actively seek those rougher spots out. The sudden hunger Nico returned with when she found the still-sore place Maki had bitten into earlier became even more intense after hearing Maki growl in retaliation, rewarding her with deeper, needier, sounds of her own.  
  
When Maki, now practically laying on top of Nico, felt her loved one’s hands trailing along her back, under her shirt, and idly picking at her bra, she pulled back. Nico chased with three light kisses before falling back, arms splayed and giggling.  
  
“Oh my god, your lips are so big!” Nico laughed, hugging Maki with her legs, “There’s so much there I didn’t know where I was supposed to be kissing!”  
  
“Seriously? That’s all you’ve got to say!?” Maki laughed incredulously before leaning back in to give her another chance to figure it out, but Nico couldn’t stop giggling, which of course was contagious. Heat turned to impassioned joy and the two tried to make up for so much lost time with countless light laughter-skewed kisses. They rolled around, taking turns being on top and at some point Nico lost her pink overshirt.  
  
“Sorry, Kuro-tan, I’m kissing my Maki here. You go hang out by the pillows,” Nico advised before tossing the panther plush down toward their feet before Maki rolled her back on top.  
  
“Nico-chan,” Maki breathed seriously, “You are now the middle... of a MakiRinPana sandwich!” before pulling the two missing representatives’ nesoberis to Nico’s cheeks and going for her lips with a loud exaggerated, “MMmmmmmmm~WAH~!”  
  
Nico practically squealed with laughter before taking the silly kiss deeper, holding Maki’s cheeks and clinging tighter with her legs. For once, Maki was able to read the mood shift appropriately and the nesos were set aside. Those hands were for Nico’s hair, her back, her sides and her hips, pulling her tighter. Closer.  
  
“I do too,” Nico managed while kissing, “Love you… for so, _so_ long.”  
  
“Nico…”

 

**11:13 AM**

 

An hour after an enforced cooldown period (because both were _entirely_ too eager to keep progressing down the physical intimacy achievement tree), and forty-five minutes into the following ‘Dam has burst, get _all_ the confessions out’ spree, Maki was lounging having shucked the bra while keeping the shirt while Nico lay sprawled over her, tracing circles on her shoulder or in her hair. Maki had lost “idle hands” privileges after her third time of getting too handsy.

“I was actually kind of grateful you didn’t know half the songs I played for you,” Maki admitted, heady with the thrill coming from confession after confession, “Almost every one of them was written about love or loss. At the time I thought I was being really clever… getting to secretly confess every other day, hoping that one day you’d catch on so I wouldn’t have to come out and say it.”  
  
Nico’s face twisted, unable to settle on humor or pain, so Maki continued with a shrug and a sigh, “As usual, trying to be smart about it just made everything more complicated than it needed to be.”  
  
“I got the jist of it,” Nico admitted, “It was while you were playing this really sad one that I figured out how I felt about you. The way you looked when you were playing it? I kind of figured it was mutual...”  
  
After a particularly feline stretch, Nico nuzzled into Maki’s chest and continued, “Let’s be real, Maki… It’s a good thing we didn’t figure this out back then. There’s no way we would have been able to keep it a secret. I’d lose all chance of making this career work, your parents would have separated us, and your position and reputation would have been jeopardized.”  
  
Nico seemed unable to meet Maki’s eyes. She added an emotional, “... and I couldn’t stand the idea of hurting you that way. I’d be wrecked over losing my shot… but losing you too? You knowing that it was because of _us_ happening that I’d’ve lost it all? I never want to drag you down with me…”  
  
“You’re better than that,” Nico barely finished before Maki grabbed her hand, gripping with those terribly powerful fingers.  
  
“That was then,” Maki assured, her voice commanding and warm, “We’re smarter now. I’m not saying we have to make it work right away. I’m not going to be what takes you away from your dream… just… I dunno, give me something to look forward to.”  
  
After a breath, Maki continued, brushing Nico’s knuckles over her lips, “I’ll wait for you. However long it takes.”  
  
“Maki…” Nico began, hiding her face to nuzzle harder, “You deserve better than that… we’re talking years here…”  
  
“So let me support you as much as I can until then. I’m _invested_ , Nico… and you don’t get to decide what’s best for me. This is Nishikino Maki making a decision about her future. _My_ choice, about what _I_ want… and what I want is _you_ . In case you didn’t notice, the old plan would be hell in comparison... so, even if I had to wait for you forever. Just… believing that it would come some day...”  
  
Nico looked devastated. After three false starts, she managed, “You are… _really_ putting it all out there… aren’t you?”  
  
“Like I said… I never knew what time is going to be the last. If I was going to break my parent’s life-long expectations for my future and go against everything I’ve been raised to do… I’d like to at least believe I’ve got a chance of it being worth it...”

“You were set to do that… even back when you didn’t know how I felt?”  
  
“... Nico, I already did. Three times. They… pushed pretty hard on those meetings. Like I said, they’re… still not talking to me.”  
  
“Maki…”

“If you ever told me that it was off, told me there’s no chance… ever… I’d accept it. I wouldn’t want you to lie to me because you think it’d spare my feelings. I’d prefer to know.”  
  
“One year… in high school… not even dating… Maki-chan, you shouldn’t have put so much into me. I mean, yeah, I’m _totally_ worth it and my heart has been all Maki-chan all the time for ages… but still… you didn’t know that,” Nico chided, “High school romances traditionally don’t work out so well in the long term…”  
  
“The rules are different for people who’ve lived like us,” Maki protested, becoming incensed, “We spent that year working together, putting our feelings out in the open for everyone to watch. We fought for that stage… even when things were at their worst. The two of us? We stuck it out further than anyone aside of Kayo-chin. When Honoka gave up? We kept going… and I would have kept going all the way, whether the others were along for the ride or not. I meant what I said. I believe in you… I know what you’re capable of.”  
  
“I never doubted you would be flooded with offers immediately after graduation. I… just… I thought it wouldn’t be so hard,” Maki admitted, wringing her hands and finding herself unable to look up, “Having you gone all the time? It’s the worst…”

“Yeah, like I said, when I get back it’s gonna be either him or me,” Nico growled, “He stands down and my contract gets renegotiated or I go public with all the crap and walk. Technically, I’m already set for life if I live really modestly… so…”  
  
“And that’s exactly what I _don’t_ want to have happen. This isn’t just a financial thing for you. I see you on stage and that’s _absolutely_ where you want to be. You don’t need to worry about me. I’ve waited this long _without_ knowing. The thought that I’d get to look forward to… this? This and more? Pfft. That’ll make waiting easy.”  
  
“Long haul, huh?” Nico smiled, crawling higher to hide her face in Maki’s neck.  
  
“Long haul,” Maki assured, feeling lighter than she could have imagined, “It’s gonna have to be if we’re going to tick off all the things on that list you gave earlier.”  
  
“Woooow~” Nico teased, “Look at Maki-chan gettin’ ahead of herself. Thinking about weddings already?”  
  
“Children, actually,” Maki corrected, “I know that there’s been progress on methods to enable same-sex reproduction, but it’s likely still a few years off before it’d be a viable option to pursue.”  
  
Nico stared, wide-eyed, her face growing more red by the moment… so Maki continued, “Fortunately, part of my career goals _do_ still involve running a hospital. As soon as I read that breakthroughs in that research were taking place, I knew I would be dedicating at least some of the facility’s resources towards either furthering that research or hopefully just implementing a team to that purpose, whether I’d eventually utilize it myself or not.”  
  
“Nerd,” Nico whispered, only barely capable of reacting in the face of… whatever talking about this was doing to her.  
  
“So, I guess on a more you and me front… would you want to carry the child or would I be?”  
  
“Shit, Maki. You do _not_ play around,” Nico breathed, red-faced and burning up, “I… uh… wow. I do not know how to follow that up. Like… Jeez… Come on! Long haul! Do we really need to talk about this _now_ ? Do _you_ have any… uhhh… preferences on the subject?”  
  
“It would be you, so… I’d be fine with it if you preferred it was me.”  
  
Nico continued to stare. After a long moment, she lowered down, opened her mouth extra wide and bit down _hard_ into Maki’s side.  
  
Naturally, Maki shrieked, “OW! NICO! What the _hell!?_ ”  
  
Nico sat up, shoved Maki down and straddled her, pinning her by the shoulders… ineffectually, but Maki rolled with it, “There will be _no more_ talk of _babies_ until there is a goddamn _ring_ on this finger, do you hear me, Nishikino?”  
  
“Alright! Jeez! I didn’t bring it up first, you know!”  
  
“For that, this touching honest heart-to-heart is turning into a game of truth with no dare options because otherwise we won’t stop till morning and we _both_ **_know_ ** _it._ ”  
  
“That’s fine,” Maki groused, “But why did you have to bite me!?”  
  
“Because I’m _really fucking_ turned on and I had to do _something,_ ” Nico growled, “You’re answering first because you’re unfairly perfect for me.”  
  
“That doesn’t make any sense!”  
  
“ _It does!_ First question!”  
  
“Fine…”  
  
“Whose name do we take?” Nico asked firmly.  
  
“I always thought Nishikino Nico sounded really funny,” Maki immediately replied in her utmost serious voice, having no trouble showing how much she had thought on this topic, “and the thought of being called Yazawa Maki gives me chills. The good kind. _However_ I have an obligation to keeping the family tradition going, so publicly we’d probably hybridize the name and in private I’d be Yazawa Maki and you would be the name of your choosing.”  
  
“Fuck you for reading my mind, only I _like_ how Nishikino Nico sounds. This is not helping my libido, sexy Yazawa-chan,” Nico growled, wiggling her hips, “Your turn to ask.”  
  
“Do you ever regret me not being a man?”  
  
Nico’s exaggerated faux-anger evaporated immediately. Maki continued, “I know you’re bi, but… a lot of your innuendo keeps going back to suggesting a male partner. I know that our circumstances would have never led to us being together if I _had_ been, but…”  
  
“You wanna hear something a little twisted?”  
  
“Is it the truth?” Maki asked.  
  
“That’s all I’ve got for you from here on out, baby,” Nico replied casually, “... but no. Zero interest trading you in for a male-type Maki-chan. Dreams and fantasies may have featured Nico starring in a three way with sexy lady Maki and her smokin’ hot male counterpart Maki, which is… really hot, but highly unlikely unless you’ve been holdin’ out. Soooo many daydreams there. Also, **_super_ ** secret internet-fueled fantasy might give my Maki-chan the occasional futanari option. You tell anyone, I’ll murder them in their sleep.”  
  
Maki laughed, “Oh my god, really?”  
  
“Really. We’re getting _toys_ with _functions_ ,” Nico demanded, poking Maki’s sternum firmly, “which should _also_ answer your _earlier_ question _which we are_ **_not_ ** _going back to._ We will discuss this and more at _length…_ **_later_ ** . Do you really watch all my interviews?”  
  
“More than once. You got me when you suggested I have them saved. They helped me get through the month,” Maki shrugged, “Can I tell your Mom and the kids? I’d like Cocoro to know I’m going to be her big sister legally as soon as possible.”  
  
“Don’t… just assume I’m going to say yes to questions you haven’t asked!” Nico laughed incredulously, “Yeah, sure. That’s cool. Did you really get off to thinking about RinPana in the clubroom. Bonus credit, did you include yourself in said fantasy?”  
  
“Oh god,” Maki groaned, “Yes, yes, and yes I threw you in there too. Why did you have to go there?”  
  
“Gotta have somethin’ to keep me warm while I’m away,” Nico winked, “I’ll let you have that one for free. Next question~”  
  
“Do you have some kind of bdsm thing going on in there?” Maki asked as she rested her hands behind her head, “You got _really_ submissive back there at the beginning.”  
  
“ _Anyone_ would get like that if they had the most beautiful girl in the world asking if they wanted her to kiss them, dumbass. You have no idea how goddamn _pretty_ you are. Also... yes. My safe word is going to be Nozomi-No.”  
  
“Good to know,” Maki replied, grinning despite the blush.  
  
“This is _not_ helping,” Nico pouted, “Do _you_ have any kind of kinks you’d like to share with the class? We already know about you’re insatiable desire for yours truly and your polyamorous inclinations, so those don’t count.”  
  
“Biting.”  
  
“ _Biting!?_ ”  
  
“Biting.”  
  
“Biting or being bit?”  
  
“Yes.”  
  
“Oops,” Nico shrank, “Uhh… sorry?”  
  
“Don’t be. You’re just lucky I know you have an event coming up and I don’t know where it’d be safe to leave a mark.”  
  
“Nnn… Well…” Nico hesitated.  
  
“Mm?” Maki encouraged.  
  
“... It… _is_ your turn to ask a question…”  
  
Nico’s inability to meet Maki’s eyes and deepening blush was horribly tempting.  
  
“Should I ask?”  
  
“It’d... definitely not be anywhere appropriate…”  
  
Maki covered her smile, “There are appropriate places to leave marks?”  
  
“Definitely not anywhere that wouldn’t lead to the thing we’re trying to avoid…” Nico replied, bunching Maki’s shirt near the bottom anxiously.  
  
“Alright then, my question is, ‘Would you be alright if we stopped avoiding it?’”  
  
“Bzzz~ Sorry,” Nico bzzed, poking Maki on the nose, “That’d be like… three questions in a row. It’s my turn, Naughty Maki.”  
  
Maki sighed, “Fire away.”  
  
“If I tell you… every single spot that would be safe… will you _promise_ to mark the _shit_ out of each and every one?”

 

**2:52 PM**

 

A few hours later, Nico was sprawled out on the bed with a cuddly tomato latched to her. The leftovers were finished, the blankets, sheets, plush, and clothes were all on the floor, Nico was covered in some fairly significant, very specifically placed, bruising and groaning appropriately, and Maki was resting her head on the poor battle-worn idol’s shoulder with the _biggest_ grin ever.  
  
“They are gonna kill me when I get back, you know?” Nico groaned, seemingly too exhausted to move.  
  
“You made me promise,” Maki replied, walking her fingers along Nico’s shoulders as tightened her leg-hug,“... and you know my work ethic requires me to be _thorough._ ”  
  
“You… definitely went above and beyond.”  
  
“You’re welcome.”  
  
“I’ll let you have that,” Nico acquiesced, “Mostly because I’m too damn worn out to fight back about it.”  
  
“See, you need more calories in your diet. How are you going to keep your energy up for long performances like these without fuel?” Maki teased, tracing around the various spots with unreasonable amounts of pride.  
  
“You’re one to talk,” Nico groused, wincing as Maki poked a particularly dark spot, “You’re skinnier than I am.”  
  
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Maki preened, “Though, given that I’ve spent most of the past hour or two chewing, my body may be fooled into thinking it’s taken in more than it has… I’d be fine to keep going if you like?”  
  
“Biting or the other thing?”  
  
“Both?”  
  
“ _No_ to the first _..._ and absolutely yes to the rest. In a bit. Just… still kinda touchy. I’d love to give a little more back if you’d hop on up here,” Nico tried to tease, but fell a little flat from the exhaustion in her voice.  
  
“Mm… tempting, but I’d rather talk a little more. That, and it’s hard to look at you from that angle.”  
  
“Aww, Maki-chan is struck by Nico’s incalculable beauty~”  
  
“Actually, right now? Yes she is.”  
  
Nico giggled a bit and asked, “Alright, flirty girl. What would you want to ask?”  
  
“I don’t know. I’m a little foggy right now, but I want to hear your voice saying words.”  
  
“Wow, eloquent,” Nico grinned, ruffling Maki’s incredibly wild hair, “Once again, casting light on why you didn’t handle lyrics.”  
  
“Anything _you’d_ like to talk about?”  
  
“On the front of things that would be appropriate and not lead to mouths getting back to work on each other? Gimme a sec.”  
  
Maki indulged in some enthusiastic nuzzling, heart thrilling and still riding the highest high of her life as Nico deliberated. As she snuggled her way down, Maki commented, “You weren’t kidding about the lean dancing thing… your stomach’s nowhere near as soft as it used to be.”  
  
“Why do you sound so disappointed?” Nico asked before continuing, “Panners mentioned something about not waiting up while we were leaving. What’s up with that?”  
  
“How many names do you have for Kayo-chin?” Maki replied incredulously, “Do you have a bunch for me too?”  
  
“Duh, though they’re mostly pet names. I’ve gotta come up with some new original ones now that I’ve got special insight on my beautiful violent lover.”  
  
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. There’s no way a doctor in training would ever be violent,” Maki waved off, “Also, I’ve been alternating where I stay every night. No one else is ever here and the girls noticed that it was… negatively impacting my emotional state.”  
  
“Nerd.”  
  
“Since there’s no one around to miss me, I figured why bother sleeping here? It still took them a few days to convince me… but I’ve definitely been eating better since I made that call.”  
  
“Maki-chan… you… weren’t cooking for yourself, were you?” Nico tensed, horrified.  
  
“That’s just it,” Maki shrugged, “I didn’t care enough to. It got kinda bad, I guess.”  
  
“You gonna make me ask them for the full story, or is my attentive, _beautiful_ , **_girlfriend_ ** going to come clean before I return some of these favors?” Nico threatened, gesturing to her carefully arrayed markings.  
  
Maki couldn’t help it. She couldn’t hide the spark of interest at the offer-not-offer and there wasn’t enough padding on Nico anywhere she could find to properly bury her face into to hide her blush, “You… don’t need to do that. Shut up. I should have never said anything.”  
  
“Oh, so you regret this, then?”  
  
“ **No,** ” Maki replied forcefully, pressing her face down into Nico’s stomach, “Just… let me think. What are you asking again?”  
  
“This is doing about as much for me as an live audience, you know that? I’ve got one of the most drop-dead gorgeous women on the planet too embarrassed to look me in the eye. Life is good,” Nico teased with a grin, “I was _asking_ for the full details on what happened after you stopped writing to Nico’s last email. Maybe if you’re good, Nico will treat you to something special~”  
  
“I was going to anyways, but where are you going with this? I’m curious now,” Maki asked, pulling away and slowly crawling her way up to meet eye-to-eye. Challenge accepted. Red faced, bright eyed, wide-smiling, and deep breathing, Maki brushed back Nico’s hair and asked, “What’s Nico-chan’s special prize?”  
  
“I’m gonna be honest here,” Nico began, wide-eyed, “I was totally going to roll with ‘letting you sit on my face and tell me that you love me,’ which said offer obviously stands by the way, but I’m startin’ to feel like it’s insufficient somehow.”  
  
“I guess that would depend on what you’d do while you were down there… though.... I can tell you how much I love you from right here if you’d like,” Maki replied with her closest approximation to a husky voice that she could pull off as her hands began to wander, “Wouldn’t you prefer that… Nico-chan?”  
  
Nico laughed nervously, “Where are you getting all this energy from? Jeez, Maki-chan. We were talking about depressing stuff!”  
  
“Yes, but _you_ are the one talking,” Maki replied matter-of-factly, “... and given that most of my depression was centered around the concept of losing you forever, it doesn’t quite have the kick it used to. I trust that makes sense?”  
  
“It does… but I still want to know what all else happened,” Nico tried to pout, but almost immediately gave in to Maki’s clear offer to continue kissing.  
  
“That depends then,” Maki breathed, guiding Nico’s hands by the wrist over her head as she straddled her, “Are we staying here tonight, or are we going to go to Kayo-chin’s like I’d originally planned before you showed up?”  
  
“It’s going to be just us if we stay here?” Nico asked, her voice small as Maki kissed her way down her neck.  
  
“Probably. Very likely.”  
  
Nico tried not to look away, but her eyes kept clenching or rolling upwards, “I… ahh… I want to stay…”  
  
“Yes, you do,” Maki agreed, focusing her attentions in a far more gentle manner than earlier, “I want you to stay too. I don’t think Kayo-chin or her parents would appreciate what I’d do to you tonight…”  
  
“Shit,” Nico gasped before replying, “Don’t… you think you could just… not? For one night?”  
  
“No… I really don’t think I can. Especially now that I know you like this,” Maki teased, “The only way this stops... is when you say so…”  
  
“But… it’s _really nice…_ ” Nico whined, shuddering harder.  
  
“Then I guess we’ll talk more about things after I’ve tired myself out a bit more… that sounds good, doesn’t it?”  
  
When Nico’s only reply was heavy breathing and reactionary shivering, Maki lightly grazed her teeth along her stomach which had been firmly confirmed as a ‘no mark zone’ as she re-asked, “Doesn’t it?” which sent Nico into much deeper whining.  
  
“Really good… just… be careful with Nico, okay? I really do need to keep this stuff hidden...”  
  
“Of course… All of those hidden places are mine. I can wait for the rest..."

 

**4:05 PM**

 

Nico leaned back into Maki, the heat of the (honestly ridiculously oversized) tub along with the tender localized massages felt glorious. This kind of dance required the use of muscles she seemed mostly unaccustomed to.  
  
“You… Nishikino Maki… are a monster.”  
  
“Oh yeah? Does this mean I get to spirit you away? Do we just… disappear together?”  
  
“That’s generally the concept behind a “vacation,” Nico air-quoted, “It’s this thing people do when they stop working and go have fun for a while.”  
  
“... I’ve been on vacations, Nico-chan…”  
  
“You think I wasn’t looking at what books you were curling up with? What kind of light reading is ‘The Administrative Professional’ or ‘Musical Therapy: A Comprehensive Look Into the blabbidy bloo boog?”  
  
“Kinda fell apart on you there, didn’t it?” Maki teased as she worked on a particularly brutal bruise _much_ lower down.  
  
“How’m I supposed to remember all that? We were _at the beach_ , and I wasn’t looking your way for book titles. I was trying to check you out!”  
  
“Classy,” Maki commented, “Just so you know, you could have had all this any time after Snow Halation.”  
  
Nico groaned, “How bad did you have it?”  
  
After a moment, Maki admitted, “Tears at least twice a month, frustration that I’d vent mostly during my period so I wouldn’t have to apologize as often, sexual stuff that I wasn’t really sure what to do with so I had to clear my browser history pretty often. You?”  
  
“Don’t get me started on browser histories. I was _way_ less pure than you, sweetness. I got through it all thanks to pure unadulterated fantasy. One after another. I was full on Maki creepin’.”  
  
“Sounds romantic. Explain?” Maki prompted, shifting to a spot on Nico’s front which was much easier and allowed her to appreciate the view a bit better.  
  
“I had a folder. It was _full_ of pictures. Of you. Most you’d know about. Some you wouldn’t. It wasn’t cool of me _at all_ , but you know how I was back then. For a lot of that time I couldn’t tell if you were totally into dudes, somewhere on the ase spectrum, or just not into me. I’m not really the best at this sort of thing.”  
  
Maki continued the after-care as she replied, “I trust you know better now. If you haven’t already, you might want to delete those. You know… we could take some new ones in a few months…”  
  
“Oh, I’m not an idiot. It broke my heart getting rid of them, but the more problematic files are long gone. Ooo, we should take some before I have to leave. You know. For you.”  
  
Maki paused, “I… would be alright with this.”  
  
“We could take pictures of us in action~ for prosperity,” Nico teased, and after a moment continued, “Went quiet there on me. Did I break my Maki-chan?”  
  
Maki resumed, “No. Just surprised. I’m all for it, assuming you’re sure it won’t come around to hurt you later.”  
  
“Nope, _you’re_ the only one hurting me right now,” Nico deadpanned, before cheering exaggeratedly, “... and it _hurts so goooooood~”_ _  
_ _  
_ Maki splashed Nico and just as she finished clearing her face, shoved her down under the water.

 

**4:56 PM**

 

Back in the bedroom, leaning back on the pillows of a hastily made bed with tubs of ice cream on their laps, Nico admitted, “You know, this was all _really_ good timing for me.”  
  
“Same. If you came around like a week or two earlier I’m not sure how well this would have gone. Why on your end?” Maki prompted.  
  
“I was considering it. Like, seriously, genuinely considering it.”  
  
“Considering what?” Maki asked, digging back into her tub and idly considering how today’s calorie count was easily triple over what she’d taken in over the past three days.  
  
“Taking Tokado up on his offer.”  
  
Making a face, Maki paused on her bite and asked, “Who is Tokado and what was he offering?”  
  
“Oh, right. Tokado’s my producer.”  
  
Spoon returned to tub, appetite lost, “... _why_ would you do that?”  
  
“The reason I signed with that company and him specifically to begin with was because he’s been a fast track name for idols since 2010. He has connections to bigger names and has been seen as a gateway to greatness for years. There’s a lot of competition to be on his short list. I didn’t know about the skeevy stuff until I actually started working with him.” Nico shrugged before taking another bite.  
  
“Go on…”  
  
“I’ve been pining over you for the better part of a year, Maki-chan. Like I said, I had no idea how to read your... all-over-the-place behavior. How much was friends stuff. How much was love stuff. How much was ‘grind me ‘til I forget my own name’ stuff…”  
  
“You really have a way with words, Nico-chan…”  
  
“Right? Anyway…” Nico began to tick off, “Again, not _really_ too busy to not feel lonely. I hadn’t realized how much I depended on the kids hanging all over me and having you and the rest of the girls around. Seriously touch-starved. I was separated from everyone I love and this jerkface has the power to authorize me getting reconnected. He’s not _entirely_ unfortunate looking. He’d be able to get me on bigger stages faster and more reliably than anyone I have access to… and it’s worked “great” for the other girls he’s ‘worked with.’ That’s why I was so pissed off in the club room.”  
  
“I was wondering why you were actually eating them. The chocolates. I thought that was some kind of acceptance thing,” Maki replied, suddenly feeling more than a little nauseous.  
  
“Yeah. You’re right. I was symbolically swallowing the bitter pill, there. I want to be up there on stage. After this guy zeroes in on you, I’ve found out that you traditionally get two choices. One gets you get access to the people and opportunities to keep your career shining. The other... backup dancing at best,” Nico sighed, picking at her toe.  
  
“Maybe I’m being naive here, but… what exactly does he want from you?”  
  
“You really want to know? If so, how graphic?” Nico asked, capping the half-empty container and setting it on the floor.  
  
“That says most of it… but I am morbidly curious…”  
  
“Exclusive access to fully ignore the contents of my contract, ignore any complaints I might make along the way, and ignore any boundaries I may have that wouldn’t also threaten exposure.”  
  
Maki set her tub aside as well, swallowing and replied, “You’re not still considering it, are you?”  
  
Incredulous, Nico glared, “Uh. _No_ . I’ve got Maki-chan. As far as I’m concerned, I’ve already won at life. Everything from here on out is consecutive victory laps. That guy’s gonna burn one way or another now. You… accepting me... is the final nail in his nasty nasty coffin.”  
  
Maki laughed, “Me accepting _you?_ ”  
  
“I don’t think I’ve really... _conveyed_ just how into you I am,” Nico deadpanned, crossing the distance to crawl onto Maki’s lap, “No one else is ever going to get to know.”  
  
“Exclusive content?” Maki grinned, liking where this was going.  
  
“Downright forbidden,” Nico smiled, “... and straight up embarrassing. I’ve got a goddamn notebook full of little umbrellas with our initials. I’ve written our names with each others surnames hundreds of times. I’ve hung emas practically every month praying that this, _us_ , would happen. I’ve spent hours watching recordings of our lives for the moments you pop up and I threatened Honoka with violence to get that initial recording of you singing Start Dash that I’ve _fucking sobbed_ at for more nights than I care to mention... because I _never_ thought that the beautiful girl with that beautiful voice would catch feelings for nasty, mean-tempered, flat-as-a-board me. _Especially_ after you’ve seen me for all that I really am.”  
  
Maki stared, wide-eyed and mind-blanked as Nico continued with a much lighter tone, “So yeah. The deal with that guy has less than zero chance of going down now that I know I’ve got you. You take your time, graduate, college it up, do your whole ‘I’m running a hospital and saving lives’ thing that you plan on doing… but just keep this in mind.”  
  
Nico reached up and placed a hand at each of Maki’s cheeks, her voice deep and smooth, “You, who were instrumental in making me believe in my dreams again… and then helping make them come true. You, who listened to my ugliest opinions, my rage, my unfairly judgmental thoughts and still somehow think me to be a good person. You, who accepted everything I offered, good _and_ bad, without ever trying to take more than I was comfortable with. You, an intelligent, gorgeous, hard-working woman that has the entire world available to her but still somehow set her sights on my fake-ass lower-middle-class self. You, one of the most attractive people I’ve ever _seen_ , looking at… this… and finds me desirable. You, who knows me, _really_ knows me, and _still_ somehow loves me _._ **_You_ ** , Nishikino Maki… are now _mine._ Now and _forever_ . Do you get that?”  
  
Maki nodded, mute and steaming hot, regardless of how much ice cream she had consumed.  
  
Nico continued, “ _No one_ aside of you knows just how important all of this is to me. Sure, I’ve worked and lived for this career. I’ve put everything I’ve got into this, and I’m not planning on stopping. I will run, and dance, and sing until this body gives out. I was one-hundred percent ready to abandon _everything_ else I’ve wanted for it.”  
  
She closed her eyes, leaned in, and touched her forehead to Maki’s, “It was an easy choice… because as impossible as “making it” in this business may be, it still seemed _way_ more realistic and attainable than _you._ You were the first thing that made me really question my dedication. The only other option I wanted. I can woo a crowd and charm my way through auditions… no problem. Finding someone as perfect as you that somehow, impossibly, likes _all_ of this? Past the act? No song, no frills, no filter? It’s like I hit the lottery four times over.”  
  
Nico pulled back and smirked, “Sure, I mean, you come with some problems of your own. The in-laws suck.”

Rediscovering her voice, Maki admitted, “That’s fair.”  
  
“You’re young enough that until you graduate we’re going to need to keep this on the **_super_ ** down low.”  
  
“Which you have to do anyways for your job.”  
  
“Until recently, you had the communication skills of geriatric walrus.”  
  
“That... makes zero sense.”  
  
“... and there’s a _really_ good chance that you’re going to grow out of your feelings for me once you get a better handle on your life, expand your interests, meet new people, and do the college thing.”  
  
“Not likely. Again, things are different for people who have lived like us.”  
  
“Celebrity relationships happen and fall apart all the time, Maki-chan.”  
  
“... What are you getting at?”  
  
Nico pulled off her shirt and spread her arms wide, “You see this? Here? Here? All of this? This isn’t just breaking rules, Maki-chan. This is practically sacrilegious… and I _asked_ you to do this. I _wanted_ you to do this… **_way_ ** before I would have even considered the idea that you’d get off on it.”  
  
Maki stared, transfixed. Nico smirked as she continued, “What I’m getting at is I’m returning your sentiment back at you. I’m **_invested_ ** in this. In you. In **_us._ ** You can take any of that ‘wanting me’ talk you can imagine and you can absolutely, 100% assume that I’m right there back at you. I like you, I love you, I want you and now that this cat is out of the closet I’m fully comfortable admitting, in private anyway, that I _need_ you.”  
  
Resuming forehead contact, Nico continued, “... and I am pretty sure that I need you more than you need me. What I’m getting at, is that I can’t have this fall apart, Maki-chan. We’re both oceans of passion now, but I can’t stand the thought of this dream ever ending, so I’m going to need you to never close back up. Remember how you feel _right now_ . Don’t get tired of me… never shut me out… I’ve always been the more open of the two of us and now that I’ve seen all that’s in here, I can’t go back. I couldn’t stand that. I didn’t want you to just chew on me just because it’s hot, I wanted _you_ to _mark_ me so you could get it to sink into your head that I’m _yours._ ”  
  
Maki gulped, nodded, and assured, “That’s… rather primal of you… and a little embarrassing. Just… keep giving me access to you and I’ll give you as much as you want. It’s a little weird hearing you be so needy.”  
  
“I’m needy because just like you kept expecting me to disappear, I keep expecting you to wake up and realize I don’t deserve you. Like I said, you’ve seen me for what I am.”  
  
“... Yeah, and? Where is all this coming from? You’re amazing. Your family is amazing. Everyone you let in comes to love you. I can’t believe you still have any doubts about this. You’re international, remember?”  
  
“Imposter syndrome is for real, baby. I had two years of people telling me I was the worst or straight up ignoring me before you showed up. It’ll be a while before I can fully shake that off… especially since my idol persona is so different from how I am in my personal life. Most of the girls in the office actually have the same problem.”  
  
Maki frowned, “That’s no good. You might have me fooled after all…”  
  
“... Wha?”  
  
Maki leaned back and grinned, “Here I thought you’d really pulled yourself together. Maybe this is just that submissive side of you holding you back… so… how about we make it mutual. If you’re so worried about me forgetting how I feel… how about you leave me a reminder?”  
  
Maki took Nico by the shoulders, rolled over top, and whispered, “How about _you_ mark _me_ ? Anywhere you like. As much as you want. Give _me_ something to show off to the girls...”  
  
Nico stared back, “Just when I thought I was done being surprised for the day… shit Maki-chan, if I wake up in the morning and this was all just a dream…”  
  
Maki interrupted with an unnecessarily firm poke to one of the larger marks from earlier, leaving Nico unable to do anything but wince and groan. In a firmer voice, Maki continued, “Not a dream. Don’t even kid about that. Now quit using that pretty mouth to talk,” before pulling off her own shirt.  
  
Wide eyed, Nico hurriedly agreed, “Jeez, yes ma’am~!”

 

**\------------**

 

**Author’s Notes:**

  
So… uhh…might seem an odd place to leave off but...

<3 ~Happy White Day everyone~ <3  
  
This was originally going to be the first and only chapter… and it had a hella different tone! Then I got extra and the first three chapters happened necessitating a full rewrite of this one. It turned out way better and less angsty this way. These two just refuse to be kept apart. This entire chapter was absolute me indulging those two for putting them through so much.  
  
Not sure if I’m going to return to this timeline. I’d love to get into some happily ever after content for after the girls were older. Maybe next year… As a general rule, I don’t write anything 18+ if the characters involved aren’t of age. However, as you’ve likely seen by now, I’m totally fine with suggesting what went down. Just not in detail.  
  
To be honest, I have no idea how that kind of content is taken around here. I know I read one of the most touching and sentimental love-making scenes I’ve ever seen here on Ao3 in arcanine’s critical rules for not-dating, but I’m fairly unaccustomed to the community and its take on the topic.  
  
That said, thanks for reading! If you’ve read this far I’m pretty impressed! I know this one may have dragged on a bit. Let me know if you want to see more of these two or if you’ve got any questions lingering. I’ve got no problems answering them in the comments.

  
Now then, back to Nishikino! This Maki and Nico’s lives and preferences may have some overlap with the pair in that story, but this is definitely a separate timeline you’ve finished looking at.  
  
Oh, but first, a little something that didn’t quite fit in but I still feel needed to be shared.

 

**\------------**

 

**March 15**

 

**9:15 AM**

 

  
“So, have you heard from Eli and Nozomi? I don’t know if those jerks have been ignoring me or if they got blocked too,” Nico asked lazily as Maki clumsily braided her hair.  
  
Absently, Maki replied, “Yeah, Eli got back in touch a few weeks ago. Apparently they lost their charger or something. They’re doing alright.”  
  
“Okay… I know I just blew your mind and all, but give me some more than _that_ . I’ve been cut off, remember?”  
  
“Sorry, this is just a lot trickier than I remember.”  
  
“How can someone so good with their hands, be bad at braiding?”  
  
“Lack of practice? Braiding and piano _are_ rather different…”  
  
“Who said I was talking about piano?”  
  
Maki yanked on the loose mess a bit harder than necessary and continued, “I’ve told you most everything I’m allowed to say already that they aren’t insisting they tell you on their own.”  
  
“ _Allowed to say!?_ What!? That’s not fair!”  
  
“Sorry, though I _am_ supposed to sneak you out to where they are at the earliest convenience.”  
  
“Are they in town!? Do they even know what’s been going on!?”  
  
“No, they’re pretty far away. Also, none of us knew exactly what was going on, remember? So, no. They just assumed you’d get things figured out and be back in touch in time.”  
  
“In time for what?”  
  
“The end of the world? I don’t know. They wanted to tell you themselves.”  
  
“Oh my god, they’re getting married. They’re probably in freaking New Zealand or something and they’re setting up some enormous cliff-side wedding.”  
  
Maki deadpanned, “They’re in Belgium and how am I supposed to know what they want to tell you?”  
  
“Still legal there! It’s a wedding!”  
  
“I can’t tell if you’re happy or pissed.”  
  
“That depends on what role they want me to play. Am I a bridesmaid? Best man? Do I get to walk Nozomi down the isle since her Dad’s a butt? Wait… what if it’s not a western style wedding!”  
  
“It’s like, one in the morning over there. We can call later.”  
  
“They _better_ not be asking me to just go as entertainment! That would _not_ be cool.”  
  
“I’m fairly certain they’re not going to ask for you to go all the way out to Belgium just to perform.”  
  
“So it **_IS_ ** a wedding!”  
  
“You know what? That’s it. I’m going to get my phone and you can call her yourself,” Maki groused, giving up on Nico’s hair and scooting off toward the side table.  
  
“It’s not like they’ll be sleeping. Nozomi’s just as much a night owl as you are.”  
  
Maki tossed her phone Nico’s way but followed it shortly after to curl into her lap… a decision she quickly regretted as Nico waited for the ringing to stop and immediately cheered, “ _Nico Nico Nii!!! I’ll Nico Nico Nii your heart! I’m Yazawa Nico-Nico and I’m here to put a smile in your heart!!!”_ _  
_ _  
_ It was all worth it though, hearing the excited screaming on the other end of the line.


End file.
